Violets in the Mountains
by PenelopeWeaving
Summary: "The violets in the mountains have broken the rocks." -Tennessee Williams. Katniss and Peeta in North Georgia. AU.
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

**Prologue – Ellijay, Georgia 1984**

Katniss clutched the baptismal dress in her hands as she walked into the Goodwill store. She looked around her. The thrift store was large, full of the cast-offs of an already down-trodden community, but she felt sure she could find something here to trade for Prim's birthday present. She made her way towards the children's section, rummaging through worn stuffed animals and tattered books of nursery rhymes. Most of the items seemed too young for her soon-to-be-nine-year-old sister. She was about to move on to the next aisle when she saw a large book beneath what looked like a collection of old McDonald's Happy Meal toys. She pulled it out and felt her heart begin to race as she saw the cover: it was an encyclopedia of animals with lots of photographs. Her heart leapt as she flipped through the pages. Perfect.

She turned the book over and saw the plain white sticker on the back cover where a wobbly hand had inscribed the price in pencil: $8. Katniss felt her nerves tangle inside her as she looked back at the dress in her hands. The fabric was only a plain and faded white cotton, but it was clean and free of stains. What set the small dress apart from any other baby's dress was the fine smocking stitched around the collar in small yellow flowers, a pattern repeated around each elastic cuff. Katniss had seen her mother smock only a few times in her life, so she knew how tedious and time-consuming it was. She also knew how valued it was because she had seen a smocked child's dress for sale in the Leevy's store a few months ago, and the dress had cost twenty-five dollars.

Surely the woman at the counter would recognize the value of the dress and agree to the trade.

Katniss made her way to the counter and stood waiting her turn, only half listening to the conversation in progress. A woman was arguing with the cashier about some items she was dropping off.

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but we only have certain days for large-item drop-off, and my manager isn't here right now."

"But when will she return? We're moving tomorrow, and I don't want to move these items." The woman's tone was brittle, and she sighed angrily as the cashier explained that the manager would return soon.

As her mind wandered, Katniss noticed a boy around the corner of the counter, standing quietly by the door. He was watching her. Katniss recognized the blonde hair framing the thin face and blue eyes. She stared back at him for a moment before looking away, connecting him with the woman standing in front of her now.

Suddenly an older woman's voice rang out from a side door that had just opened, and the cashier seemed relieved. "Mrs. Brand, a customer needs help with an immediate drop-off," she said. Mrs. Mellark moved away from the counter, beginning her assault on the manager before she had made it into the office.

The cashier looked wearily at Katniss, clearly relieved to be free of Mrs. Mellark. Katniss approached the counter and put down the book and the dress. The cashier checked the price on the book and punched in the numbers. Then she picked up the dress and began inspecting it closely. She looked up at Katniss and said, "Just a second," before taking the dress with her back to the office.

Katniss stood waiting until she heard a voice say quietly, "Hey, Katniss." The boy was at her elbow.

Katniss studied him a moment. He was wearing what looked like a brand-new Rugby shirt and Docksiders. "Hey, Peeta."

"What are you doing?"

"I'm trying to trade a dress for a book," she replied. "For my sister's birthday. What about you?"

"Mom's trying to sell some stuff."

Katniss suddenly realized what she had just heard his mother say. "You're moving? Where?"

"Back to Atlanta. Dad's bought a bakery in Decatur. Mom's never really liked it here."

Katniss nodded, not surprised. Peeta's family had moved to Ellijay when they were in kindergarten after Mr. Mellark's father had died, leaving him the family bakery off the main square on Church Street. In the intervening years, Mrs. Mellark had made few friends, in large part due to her vocal disdain for the small, North Georgia town.

Katniss felt a funny sinking in her stomach, but her attention was drawn to the cashier coming back to the counter. "Sorry that took so long," she said, "but I had to do a price check on the dress since it wasn't marked. Mrs. Brand says you can have it for ten-fifty."

"What?" Katniss croaked. "I'm not buying this dress. I'm here to trade it!" She could hear the tone of her voice rising.

"What's the problem?" Katniss looked to see Mrs. Brand and Mrs. Mellark returning from the side office.

"I brought this dress to trade," she said, trying to control her voice.

Mrs. Brand's eyes narrowed. "That's impossible. We got that dress in last week."

Mrs. Mellark crossed her arms over her chest, clearly interested in the drama unfolding in front of her.

Katniss felt her stomach plummet. "But it's mine!" she cried. "My mother made it for my baptism, and my sister wore it, too. I want to buy this book for my sister's birthday present."

Mrs. Mellark made a clucking noise in the back of her throat as Mrs. Brand straightened her shoulders and bore down on the small girl. "Quit that lyin', girl. Either buy the book or get out of my shop before I throw you out!"

Katniss flinched at the older woman's tone. She knew she was defeated, knew she couldn't fight the disdain of both of these women, but the fury that filled her small body radiated outward, anchored her in place a moment more as she shifted her gaze between the women.

When she felt her eyes begin to burn, she turned on her heel and ran. Peeta had returned to his place by the door, and he jumped to get out of her way.

* * *

Katniss made it onto her bike and out of the parking lot before the tears started to fall. She pushed her legs as hard as she could, her braid thumping against her back. She stayed on the shoulder of Route 52 for half a mile before turning left down a dirt road that wound its way into the woods. Here, she slowed, half-heartedly pumping, allowing her mind to process what had just happened. The wind had dried her tears, and now her anger seeped away, replaced instead by despondency. She hadn't actually wanted to trade away the dress. She knew her mother would not have approved, but she also knew that Prim's birthday would probably go unnoticed if she didn't do something herself, and it was the only thing she could think of.

Katniss had just turned twelve when her father had been hit by a drunk driver four months ago. Since then, her life had changed drastically. The family's meager savings had dwindled under the strain of hospital bills and then funeral costs. They had sold her father's car and then the television. Her mother began to work longer hours as an in-home hospice care-taker in order to make ends meet. She managed to cover their essential bills, but she was rarely at home. Katniss had begun to wonder if her mother's absences might be due to more than just financial reasons. When Mari Everdeen was at home, she was silent, disinterested in her girls, a physical presence only.

This change had been hardest on Primrose. At eight, the girl had lost her father to death and her mother to grief, and Katniss hadn't known what to do about it. She had tried filling in the gaps as much as possible, making sure her sister was fed and clothed, leaving the bills on her mother's pillow where she knew she would see them, hoping her mother would remember to pay them. Recently, Mari had begun staying away for days on end, and Katniss and Prim would come home to find groceries in the refrigerator but no other sign of her. She began leaving her mother notes: _Prim needs new shoes. _Or _Please leave money for school supplies. _Usually her mother would show back up a few days later.

Last week she had left a note about Prim's birthday. It had disappeared, so she knew her mother had found it, but her mother hadn't shown up or left any money.

Katniss did not know what to do. Resting where her bike had come to a stop, she leaned her head down on her handlebars, her heart racing and her stomach churning. She took gulping breaths but couldn't breathe. Her skin had a tingling feeling, and she was beginning to sweat. She still couldn't get a full breath of air. Dropping her bike, she lurched towards a nearby tree and leaned against it as her legs collapsed underneath her. She had begun to shake, and panic rolled through her in waves.

She sat, hunched and rocking, trying to catch her breath. She began to count backwards, trying to focus her mind on something benign. The tightness in her chest lessened a bit. She took a long, slow breath, trying to order her body and mind and regain control.

At last the world stilled around her. Her mind began to clear, and she slowly relaxed. The sun filtered through the trees. She became aware of the sounds in the in the branches around her, picking out the trill of the winter wren. She breathed. In the cool November air she could smell the sweet, loamy dirt beneath her. She breathed. She felt the chaos seep away like water into the ground. She turned slightly to run her hand on the bark of the pine tree at her back. She took another breath and closed her eyes.

* * *

Katniss woke to the sound of a squirrel barking close above her head. She sat up with a jerk, her neck aching from the uncomfortable position she'd slept in propped against the tree. The light of the woods had softened and the air was colder. It had gotten late. She hastened over to her bike, steering it back onto the path and heading for home. Prim was spending the day with their neighbors, the Hawthornes, and they expected her to join them for dinner.

When she turned onto her street, Katniss saw a bike lying in her front yard. She slowed down, hopping off her own in front of it and looking around. She didn't recognize it and didn't see anyone around. She cautiously walked her bike up the driveway and propped it up against the carport wall. Then she saw him sitting on the step to the kitchen door.

Peeta stood up as he saw her. He smiled a small smile and walked towards her. He was carrying a large, brown paper bag.

"Hey," he said.

She looked at him a moment before speaking. "What are you doing here?"

He blushed. "I brought you this."

She found herself holding the bag. Her nerves reignited as she looked down into it and saw the animal encyclopedia in the bottom of the bag. She looked up at him, wide-eyed, stunned into silence.

"I...I just...felt bad. About what happened. I wished I could have helped somehow."

Katniss swallowed. "How did you get this?"

"I rode my bike back down to the thrift store after I got home. Then I came here."

In the back of her mind, Katniss processed the distance between her house and his on the town square. She didn't know how many miles.

"I can't," she said, closing the bag and pushing it back toward him.

He stepped back, raising his hands and refusing to take the bag from her. "I can't take this!" she insisted. "I can't pay you for it!"

"Katniss, please! I don't want you to pay me! It was unfair what that woman did to you. I just wanted to help!"

Katniss' nerves were humming through her body, her stomach churning again. She didn't know what to do.

Her eyes began to fill, and she felt like she was about to break apart. He was watching her with a worried expression. "Hey," he said, stepping forward. Awkwardly, he put his arms around her. "It's OK. Really." She froze, holding her breath and trying keep herself together. His arms were stiff around her, but she thought if she could just hold on a minute more, she'd be all right. He was rambling, so she focused on his voice. "I swiped the money from my dad's wallet, but he won't notice. And if he does, he owes me for, like, three weeks' worth of allowance, so it won't matter." She remained silent, but she slowly exhaled. He stepped back, running his hands down her arms. "Think of it as a going away present."

She looked at him, seeing his lop-sided smile as he said this last bit. "But you're the one going away."

"Yeah," he said, suddenly serious. His blue eyes held hers before he looked away. "I'd better get going." He began backing up.

Katniss followed him slowly as he made his way back down the driveway towards his bike. She watched him pick up his bike and throw his leg over the bar. He stared at her.

"I don't know what to say," she whispered. "Thank you."

He reached out and briefly touched her face. His eyes darkened, and she couldn't read the expression on his face.

"I'll see you again," he said. And with that, he stood up on his pedal and rode away.

Katniss watched him go before reaching down into the bag to retrieve the book. She felt her hands brush something soft, and it was only then that she realized that he had not only brought her the book. Her smocked dress was folded carefully at the bottom of the bag.

* * *

**A/N** Thanks so much to LollerCakes and ZenLeigh (BohemianRider) who helped beta! I appreciate your feedback and support!


	2. Chapter 2: Ridgecrest

**Chapter 1 – Blue Ridge, Ga, 1992**

Peeta climbed the steps of the great, slate porch and looked around. In every direction, he saw mountains and woods. The crisp air was a welcome change from the oppression of the Atlanta humidity that in early June had already descended upon the city. He took a deep breath. It felt good to be back.

He turned and walked inside the dining hall where he found the registration table.

"Welcome to Camp Ridgecrest," said a disheveled man behind the table.

"Thanks, Mr. Abernathy. I'm Peeta Mellark. We met when I interviewed?"

The man squinted up at him. "Right. Call me Haymitch. Everyone does."

"Peeta!" said a voice. Peeta turned around to see a guy his age walking up to him and offering his hand. "Hey, man. I'm Finnick Odair. Welcome! I know your brother Ben from the Pike house! He told me you'd be here."

"Hey. Yeah, nice to meet you," said Peeta, not sure he really wanted this association with his brother.

"Isn't that how you knew about this camp?"

"Well, no. Not really. I mean, we lived near here when I was a kid."

"Oh yeah! Well, anyway, let's get you set up."

"You'll be in cabin B-9, rooming with Dalton," Haymitch supplied.

"He's a good guy," said Finnick. "Back down the porch stairs, take a left down the path, and you'll come to the boys' cabins. B-9 is the last one, just beyond the bridge. You've got just a little time to unpack before dinner at six."

"Thanks, man. Good to meet you," Peeta said. "See you later."

Peeta walked down the path looking at his surroundings. The line of boys' cabins ran adjacent to a large creek. He could hear but not see the waterfall that Ridgecrest was famous for as he spotted B-9 at the end of the row of cabins.

At dinner that night, Peeta couldn't help but laugh inwardly at Finnick. After joining him at his table, Peeta found himself surrounded by women – all of whom laughed and smiled and seemed more than eager to occupy Finnick's attention. And the good-natured man doled it out to them in turn, laughing and teasing, flirting with anyone who happened to turn his way, as well as some who didn't.

As the dining hall began to empty out, Peeta noticed a table in the corner filled with people he hadn't yet met. He felt his attention drawn to a woman laughing with her companions. The room around him seemed to fall away as his eyes lingered on her long, dark braid. When she turned and he saw her profile, he found his mouth dry. He tried to swallow.

He sat there for a moment before leaning over to Finnick. "Who's that?"

"Who?"

Peeta inclined his head toward the far table. "Is that girl named Katniss Everdeen, by any chance?"

Finnick turned back to Peeta with a surprised smile. "You know Kat?"

He was starting to sweat. His face felt frozen. "Long ago. When we were kids."

"Well, that calls for a reunion!" he said, too loud.

"No, Finnick, stop. I'm sure she doesn't remember me. I'll talk to her later." But Finnick was already standing up and Peeta could only follow.

Finnick slid onto the bench next to Katniss and snuck his arm around her waist. "The lovely Katniss. How did you make it through the winter without me?" Peeta watched her stiffen.

"It was a trial, for sure," she said, pushing him away and laughing darkly.

"Don't push me away, love," he said, inching closer. "You know this is our summer."

"No, no, Finn. Last summer was ours. You missed it."

He looked at her with wide eyes. "But I didn't know! Surely I get another chance!" He buried his face into her neck, but she pushed him off again. "Besides, I've brought with me an old friend of yours. Peeta! Get over here," he said, motioning him closer.

Peeta tried to keep a relaxed smile on his face as Katniss looked at him. He recognized her easily despite the lapse of almost seven years. He saw surprise and recognition flash in her gray eyes before her expression hardened, emotionless like a mask.

Finnick hadn't stopped talking as Katniss and Peeta took each other in. "You know Peeta will be the catch of the summer. Campers and counselors alike. I've already seen Glimmer and Clove both eyeing him. C'mon, Peeta! Hard to resist that beautiful girl, right? What's your bet, Katniss? How long until he has a fling with Glimmer?"

By this time, Katniss had turned back to Finnick, and she smirked at his final words. "A week," she said. "Tops." Finnick howled as Peeta shifted on his feet.

"I'll take that bet," Peeta said, looking back and forth between the two of them. He tried to keep his voice light. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to unpack my monk's robes and rosary beads since I'm about to have a lonely week." He smiled at them and turned to go. "Good to see you again, Katniss," he called over his shoulder as he made his way out of the dining hall.

He pushed through the screen door and walked quickly down the steps, ignoring the group that had gathered on the porch to play cards. His mind was a jumble of thoughts he couldn't see through.

Before coming to Ridgecrest, Peeta had toyed with the idea of trying to find her this summer. He thought that maybe on a free weekend, he would drive over to Ellijay. It was stupid, really. He didn't have a plan, but the moment was comfortably in the future. He had time to figure out how he would approach her. What he might possibly say. Or at least, that's what he'd thought.

He had wondered about her over the years. He had felt such confidence that day on his bike, riding away with the thought that the future would bring them back together. _Naive_, he thought. In time, of course, his mind drifted away from her as he met other girls and sank into the world of adolescent hormones. But after each girl, he couldn't help thinking back to her and turning the memories over in his mind. And he wondered if he ever would see her again.

_But it wasn't supposed to happen that way._

He had imagined it so many times, but never did he foresee the sarcasm in her voice, the flippant way she regarded him. He reached his cabin and sat down on his bed, baffled. He wasn't sure what to do next.

He was still sitting there when he heard a tentative knock. He looked up, hopeful, but was disappointed to see bright blonde hair surrounding pale skin outside the screen door. He stood up and opened the door.

"Hey Glimmer," he said, trying to sound more enthusiastic than he actually felt.

"Peeta! I saw you leaving the dining hall and wondered what you are up to tonight." She smiled, showing perfectly white teeth.

"Oh, you know. I'm pretty beat," he said. "I had an early morning. I think I'm just going to unpack and get settled in. Maybe write a letter home." _Yeah, right_.

"Some of us are going into town for pizza and beer. You should come!"

"Thanks so much, Glimmer. Not tonight."

She smiled her best smile at him before backing up. "Well, come looking for us if you get lonely. The first week of camp can be rough." She smiled again before turning away.

Peeta shut the door and sat back down on his bed. He needed a plan.

Beginning the next morning, Peeta sat through training sessions to prepare him for the summer ahead. He learned everything from CPR and basic first aid to canoeing and water safety to lanyard weaving and pine cone crafts. And in each session, he found no trace of Katniss. By the end of the day, when he hadn't seen her in the dining hall, either, he was beginning to wonder if he'd imagined the interlude.

He considered asking Finnick about her again, but he was slightly afraid of what might result if he did.

After dinner that night, Haymitch held a meeting for all counselors to discuss logistics. Peeta found himself on the big stone porch looking out at the mountains as he waited for the meeting to begin. It was a cool night for June, and he was glad he had put on long sleeves as the sun disappeared behind the mountain.

"Hey, everyone!" Haymitch called to get the counselors' attention. "Hope y'all had a good first day. I want to brief you a little on the week ahead."

There would be another day of training sessions tomorrow before everyone hiked up to the meadow on Wednesday for training on boundary hikes and overnight camping. Then the counselors would spend Thursday and Friday cleaning cabins and equipment in preparation for the first campers to arrive that weekend.

"Each week, you will be paired with a co-counselor, and your groups will do everything together for the week." Haymitch paused and looked around to make sure everyone was following him.

Seemed simple enough, and Peeta found his mind wandering as he looked around the porch trying to put names with a few faces: there was Thresh, Finnick's cabin-mate, and Madge, a quiet girl he didn't really have a sense of yet. His own cabin-mate, Dalton, was near him sitting with Glimmer and two other women he didn't know. Finnick sat on the bench next to Glimmer, smirking and flirting as Haymitch talked.

"You and your co-counselor will plan everything for the week you are paired, so you'll get to know each other really well." Peeta's eyes fell on Glimmer as Haymitch spoke these words, and she was looking at him intently. _Shit,_ he thought. Gotta watch out for that one.

"OK, so that's about it. Campers arrive each Sunday after lunch and depart on Friday. There's a counselors meeting each Saturday morning. From there you're free until Sunday lunch." He looked around. "Let me know if you have any questions!"

Peeta was relieved to see Glimmer get up and walk off the porch with some girls. He stayed where he was, enjoying the night and watching the others mill around.

"So how was the day? Starting to feel like you know the ropes?" Finnick asked, sitting down next to him.

"Good! Looking forward to the kids getting here."

"Yeah, this place changes pretty drastically once that happens."

"I can imagine." Peeta paused. "So, why haven't I seen Katniss around today?"

Finnick grinned at him. "I figured you were interested."

Peeta tried to play it down. "I really don't even know her. Haven't seen her in years. But yeah, I mean, I'd like to talk to her." He shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant. "Besides, sounds like this is 'your summer,' right?"

Finnick laughed. "Katniss has never given me the time of day, and not from a lack of trying, believe me. It's a joke more than anything. I come on strong and she pushes me away. It works. We're friends. But you won't see her around too much. She's not a counselor."

"What? What does she do here?"

"She lives here year-round. She got a sweet scholarship from the camp board of trustees. She's at Young Harris College doing something like environmental studies, and Camp Ridgecrest pays her tuition. She lives in a small cabin up by the meadow and acts as a kind of caretaker through the winter, helps with trail maintenance, whatever they need her to do." He scratched his chin. "It's a sweet set-up, but Young Harris is only a two-year college. I don't know what she's doing next year."

The next few days passed quickly for Peeta. The days were long and jam-packed with stuff to learn and remember. He got to know a few other counselors better. Dalton, though quiet, had a dry sense of humor. Madge, who was starting her third year as a counselor, seemed to hold the answer to every question he might have, and he found himself looking to her more than Finnick for guidance in navigating his surroundings. He met a girl named Clove who also seemed to know his brother Ben. She gave him a knowing look as she divulged this information. Peeta didn't want to know what stories were lurking there.

When the counselors camped out in the meadow, Finnick pointed out the path that led to Katniss' cabin. He stored the information away but did not comment.

Later, in a sleeping bag under the stars, Peeta felt more at ease than he could remember feeling. He'd had a particularly hard semester academically, and his parents had not wanted him to take this job. He'd worked at the family bakery practically all of his life, and he enjoyed it – he did. But he'd applied for this job on a whim, just looking for _something_ different. Neither of his brothers would be home this summer, either, and while his mother seemed to tolerate their decisions, she treated Peeta's decision to leave Atlanta for the summer as a family betrayal.

But that night under the stars, in the quiet darkness of June in North Georgia, Peeta exhaled the thoughts of home that had plagued him and consciously chose to live in that solitary moment.

And then, suddenly, she was there.

The next morning, he was helping to make pancakes over the open fire when he unexpectedly saw gray eyes, a dark braid in front of him with an empty plate asking for the next two.

And then she was there again, asking for two more.

When she returned a third time, he quirked an eyebrow at her. "Should I put more than two on your plate this time?"

She grinned, and his heart skipped a beat. "They're really good," she mumbled.

He slid three more onto her plate this time and watched her walk away.

After breakfast was over and cleared away, Haymitch called for everyone's attention. "Hope everyone had a good night's rest last night. It might be one of the last you get until after the kids have come and gone." Some of the counselors laughed at this. "This morning, a group will be heading off on the boundary hike. If you are new to Ridgecrest, this will be your chance to learn the route before you have to lead a group of kids on it next week, so I strongly suggest you go."

He looked around the group. "Where's Katniss?"

Peeta saw Katniss step forward from the back and give a short wave.

"Right," Haymitch said, nodding in her direction. "Katniss will lead the group. If you're a returning counselor and don't feel like you need a refresher, then you can start the hike back to camp. The order for the afternoon is to prepare your cabins. Get them scrubbed and cleaned and ready for the kids to dump all over them next week."

From his spot, Peeta watched as most of the counselors began packing up their stuff. He made his way over towards Katniss in time to hear her directions. "The boundary hike will end up back here, so y'all won't need to carry your packs with us. But bring your water bottles." She looked around the group. "So grab them, and we'll get going."

After packing up his stuff and refilling his bottle, Peeta made his way back over to the group forming around Katniss. He was surprised to see Madge among the others.

"I'd have thought you wouldn't need to go on this hike," he said to her.

She smiled sheepishly. "I have a _terrible_ sense of direction," she said. "I know that all you have to do is follow the double blue lines, but I've gotten lost on this hike three times in the two summers I've worked here. Believe me, you do not want to be lost in the woods during middle school week! So I always need a refresher."

"Madge," said Katniss, "I told you last summer I'd go with your group on the hike! Just let me know when you're going."

"Thanks. We'll see how it goes this year."

Katniss looked around. "I think we're all here." She put her hand on the tree next to her. "If you look up here, you'll see two blue blazes. These mark the boundary hike, so when you take your kids, you just follow them. Periodically on the hike, you'll see yellow and then black blazes merging and diverging with the trail, but you'll just keep following the blue."

She picked up a small pack at her feet and slung it over her shoulder. "Well, let's get going."

The path led out of the meadow and down a gravel road before turning off into the woods.

Katniss pointed to the blue blazes marking the turn. "Most people tend to watch their feet while they're hiking," she said, turning to face the group. "And while you certainly need to watch your footing, if you're only looking down you'll probably miss a trail marker."

"Like me," said Madge.

"Like Madge," said Katniss, smiling. "But beyond that, of course, you'll miss the scenery."

She turned around and continued walking. "The woods are really dense through most of the hike. I'll try to identify for you some of the different trees we'll see. Towards the end of the hike, we'll pass the third oldest tree in Georgia. You'll hear lots of birds. Your groups will scare away most of the wildlife as they walk, since the kids won't be too quiet walking through the woods."

Peeta hadn't had a lot of outdoor education, and he was fascinated listening to her talk. He'd found himself toward the back of the group, and he couldn't think of a polite way to elbow the rest of the group out of the way so he could join her at the front, so he contented himself with listening to her voice as he took in his surroundings.

And the views were stunning. Peeta could hear Whitman whispering in his ear with each step. _Why are there trees I never walk under but large and melodious thoughts descend upon me?_ The forest was thick but without much underbrush, and Peeta could make out the lay of the land. The sunlight only just permeated the thick foliage, and the patches of light filtered in like spotlights on the leaves.

After walking about forty five minutes, he could see the trees giving way up ahead. He began to see splashes of color, more with each step until he finally reached a horseshoe-shaped clearing lined with azaleas, deep orange cascading from every branch, as if the leaves were dripping their colors onto the ground.

Katniss waited by the side of the path while the group made its way into the clearing. "This is always a good place to stop, have snacks, and rest for a minute," she said following them in.

The group stood in the center of the horseshoe surrounded by the blooms and just gazed, turning circles, watching grass meet flowers meet sky.

Peeta saw Madge sitting on a log in the clearing and went to join her. He opened his water and took a long drink. Around them they could hear a loud, low hum, the buzzing of what seemed like hundreds of bees hovering over the flowers.

"I love this walk," Madge said next to him. "I think that's why I get lost. I'm so busy looking around me that I forget to look for the trail."

"It really is amazing," he agreed. "It feels kinda surreal that I get to work here this summer."

"Yes, that's the Ridgecrest version of beer goggles."

He looked at her quizzically. "What?"

"Oh, you know, the week before the campers get here, or after they're gone, or next winter in the middle of midterms, you'll think of this place with all its idyllic qualities and think it's the most perfect place on earth. And it is! But it's also exhausting. Being around kids all day every day wears on you." She smiled. "After the second week of camp, you'll feel like you've been here forever. By the third week, you'll feel like you've known these people all your life. Things tend to happen fast around here."

She shrugged. "It's hard to explain. You'll see"

As the group began to reassemble, Peeta maneuvered himself so that he was closer to the front of the group. He walked along behind Katniss for a few minutes before trying to bridge the gap.

"So, how long have you been working here?"

Katniss turned slightly as she walked. "Well, I started here when I was sixteen as one of the Grubs."

"Grubs?"

"Basically the maintenance personnel. It's the summer team in charge of upkeep of all the facilities."

"Why Grubs?"

"I have no idea. Because we have to do some less-than-desirable jobs? It's kinda a term of endearment." She shrugged. "So, I did that for a couple of years, and then when I was a senior, I applied for this scholarship." She looked at him as if to question whether he knew about that already or not.

"Yeah," he admitted. "Finnick mentioned something about that."

"Right," she said with a small smile. "So I've been living here now for the last two years."

They walked on in silence for awhile after that. The path had become more rugged as it began an ascent.

About half-way up she stopped and checked on the progress of the group. "This is the steepest climb of the trail. Not much farther now, and we'll be rewarded with a fantastic view at the top."

She began to climb again before stopping and turning around once more. "Your campers are going to want to use the smaller trees and undergrowth on the side of the path to pull themselves up the climb. Try to keep them from doing that, though. It will eventually widen the path, and we try really hard around here to abide by the 'leave no trace' philosophy."

Peeta was breathing heavily when he finally reached the top. As he walked out towards the ridge, he could feel the wind lift his hair from his head. He could taste the fresh air. From where he was standing, mountains filled the sky.

An hour later, after traversing a steep descent and then following a stream for about a half a mile, the group suddenly reemerged in the meadow where they had begun. They started packing up their stuff and preparing to hike back to camp.

Peeta was feeling that exhilarated kind of exhaustion that comes after a good hike, and he was glad the walk back to camp was downhill. He had begun to think about postponing cabin cleaning until tomorrow morning so he could grab a nap after lunch.

"Great job, everyone," Katniss said in parting. "Remember, if you're worried about anything, if you're paired with a co-counselor for the week who is also new and you're afraid you might get lost, just let me know. I'm happy to go along with you." She turned to go. "I'll see you around camp!"

Peeta picked up his pack and caught up with Katniss on her way out of the meadow. As they approached the turnoff that led to her cabin, he said, "By the way, we never discussed terms for the bet."

She stopped and looked at him, clearly a little startled. "Terms?"

"Sure. What am I going to get when I win?"

She smirked. "What about if I win?"

"You won't," he said. He could tell his confidence was making her a little uneasy.

"What are we talking about here?" she deflected. "Whether or not you'll hook up with Glimmer by Sunday?"

"Exactly," he said. "But let's extend it. Not by Sunday but by next Friday - the end of the first week of campers. That's essentially two weeks for Glimmer to work her wiley ways."

Katniss laughed. "OK. So if I lose this bet, I'll... I don't know. What do you want?"

He raised his eyebrows at her. "I hope you don't regularly negotiate bets like this," he said. "You're liable to get yourself in trouble."

"Hey! That's not what I meant! OK, let me think. Next weekend?" She thought for a moment. "Um, if I lose, I'll take you to lunch on that Saturday. How's that? Now, what about if I win?"

He leaned in close to her and put his lips next to her ear before saying softly, "You won't."

With that, he turned and continued down the path back to camp.

**A/N: **

Camp Ridgecrest is a fictional camp though it resembles the one I worked at in college – with a few key differences.

For most of its history, Young Harris was a two year college – as it was in 1992, the setting of this story. It earned its 4-year accreditation in 2008.

**Huge** thanks for ZenLeigh (BohemianRider) and LollerCakes for their Beta support!


	3. Chapter 3: Sae's House

Peeta and Dalton were sweeping out their cabin one last time when Peeta's first camper arrived. It had been a busy weekend of preparations. He had been glad when Madge was assigned as his co-counselor for the first week, which would be with middle schoolers. He wasn't nearly as nervous as he'd thought he'd be since they had spent the weekend planning. He felt prepared and ready to go.

He'd seen Katniss a couple of times since the hike but not for any length of time. He strove to be as casual as possible with her. He didn't know her well - not yet, he told himself - but he could sense that she was skittish. His grandmother would have said, "That girl has elbows." She seemed to keep people at a distance.

Peeta knew he needed to handle this situation just right. He was a little thrown off by how important it seemed.

But most of the time these thoughts were in the back of his mind as he made ready for the arrival of campers. And here was his first, walking in the door.

Peeta gave his most enthusiastic smile and said, "Hi! I'm Peeta! Welcome to Ridgecrest!"

The boy looked shyly at Peeta, holding his sleeping bag in his arms. "I'm Rand," he said. Just then the screen door opened and a man and woman walked in.

"I'm Peeta," he said, extending his hand.

The woman shook it and moved out of the way for the man to do the same. "Hi, we are Rand's parents."

"Nice to meet you! Where are y'all from?"

Rand's father began to reply but was interrupted by the slamming of the door. A boy with bright blonde hair had run in and was standing in the middle of the room.

"Hi there," Peeta said.

"I call a top bunk!"

"OK. That's fine." The boy threw his sleeping bag up on the nearest bunk, narrowly missing Rand's mother's head. "Careful there! What's your name?" Peeta asked, raising his eyebrows at Dalton, who tried not to laugh from across the cabin. The boy had scrambled up to the bunk and was getting ready to jump down.

"Cato? Cato!" A woman appeared at the screen door. "Cato? Are you in there?" She opened the door. "There you are. You ran off so fast, and I couldn't find you."

Peeta introduced himself to the woman and turned to see another family coming in the door. The summer had officially begun.

* * *

The afternoon was full of get-to-know-you games and activities designed to tire the kids out. Peeta and Madge's group bonded well, and by dinner time, the group was relaxed and happily chatting with each other.

Peeta was amazed by the change in the dining hall brought about by adding 80 ten-to-twelve-year-olds. The room was full of sticky, sweaty bodies, too many crammed into the small space, and the walkways between the tables were narrow. Peeta kept finding himself jostled from behind as people tried to make their way through the maze of tables.

More invasive than the press of bodies, though, was the press of noise. The conversation at their table, naturally, was boisterous and punctuated with the laughter and squeals of so many middle schoolers, and they were, of course, surrounded by tables made up of populations exactly the same. The dining hall during middle school week trembled under the strain of barely controlled chaos.

Walking out after dinner, Peeta smiled over at Madge. "I think I'm starting to realize what you meant when you said this was all-consuming."

"Yep!" she said brightly. "And this is only day one! Have you and Dalton divided up nights yet?"

"What do you mean?"

"Middle schoolers have lights out at 9, and someone has to stay in the cabin. But most cabin-mates swap out in the evenings so you can have a little free time. We hang out on the porch, play cards, or whatever."

"Good to know," he said. "I'll probably volunteer to take the first shift. I think I need to keep a close eye on Cato. His mom pulled me aside, and guess what? They decided to take him off his ADHD meds – starting yesterday." He shook his head.

Madge cackled. "Classic."

* * *

By mid-week, Peeta could not remember ever being so tired in his whole life. They had swum, canoed, and played more games than he could remember. They had stayed up late and gotten up early.

On Wednesday morning, Madge and Peeta led the group on a creek hike during which the entire group got soaking wet from the frigid mountain stream and a bit bruised from climbing over slick rocks. At the end of the hike, the kids splashed in the pool at the bottom of the waterfall while Madge and Peeta made sure the kids didn't get too close to the falls. Peeta intercepted Cato wielding a stick the size of a small tree. Before he knew what had happened, the boy had slipped on a rock and the branch connected with Peeta's thigh, leaving a bruise that would take weeks to clear up.

Peeta had barely seen Glimmer. The nights he was out of the cabin just happened to be the nights that she was in her own, and Peeta had been relieved by this seemly fortuitous turn of events – until he made a discovery one night. He'd been reading on his bunk when he heard Dalton returning to the cabin. And then he heard a high, tinkly voice. And then he heard nothing. And that's how he found out that Glimmer's first fling of the summer had actually been with Dalton.

Peeta couldn't help laughing to himself.

* * *

Peeta and Madge led their group up to the meadow on Thursday afternoon. As they got closer to the camping spot, he wondered if he'd see Katniss. He and Madge had discussed whether to enlist her help on the next morning's hike, but Madge wanted to do it without guidance.

"I'm sure between the two of us we can figure it out!"

As they cooked Hobo Dinners over the campfire, the kids ran around playing capture the flag. "The amount of energy they have is unbelievable," he said for what must have been the hundredth time that week.

"Hey, who's in charge of these unruly children?" He looked to see Katniss walking towards them. Her dark hair was wet and hanging down her back, and Peeta couldn't believe the way his heart suddenly constricted in his chest.

"Katniss!" said Madge. "What are you doing here?"

"Haymitch mentioned you'd be hiking tomorrow, so I thought I'd check in to see if you wanted some help."

_Yes, yes, yes, God yes_.

Madge stuck out her chest in a mock-show of bravado. "We will conquer the Blue Ridge Mountains alone," she intoned. "Or at least the boundary hike."

Katniss smiled. "Good. Well, I'll look for you at lunch and send out the dogs if you're not yet back."

Peeta turned back to the campfire. "Want to join us for dinner?" he asked.

"How can I refuse a Hobo Dinner?" she said solemnly.

"We have about five extra, so I think we can cover your appetite."

"Watch it, mister."

Peeta began pulling the foil-wrapped dinners off the fire as Madge rounded up the kids. Everyone inhaled their meals, Peeta noticed with satisfaction. He knew he was a good cook, but he also figured he could have served them all liver and onions with similar results because any meal cooked on an open fire at the end of a long day is unerringly delicious.

Peeta liked watching Katniss with the campers. She was as closed and reserved as always, but the kids loved her anyway, seemed to eat up her dry sarcasm as they tried to pry a laugh out of her.

After the obligatory roasting of marshmallows and the telling of ghost stories, they finally got the kids into their sleeping bags. Peeta, Katniss, and Madge sat around the dying fire, only occasionally having to bark at the campers to quiet down.

"Is Prim coming up this summer?" Madge asked Katniss.

"How is Prim?" Peeta asked, remembering the small, blonde girl from years ago.

"She's good. She's about to be a junior in high school." Katniss scrunched up her face. "It's hard to believe. Yeah, she'll be up during senior high week. She's excited. Rue's coming back, too. And Madge, they've requested to be in your cabin again this year."

"Awesome! I'll love having her again."

"So how's the first week been?" Katniss asked.

"Typical," Madge replied. "Exhausting. But we've survived. Peeta's naturally good with kids." She turned to Peeta. "Honestly, I don't know how you keep your patience."

Katniss looked at Peeta out of the side of her eyes as Peeta just shrugged. "I don't know. I like kids. I think they're funny."

"Well, it won't be so funny when they're waking us up at first light tomorrow morning. I need to get some sleep," Madge said.

Peeta agreed, and Katniss stood up to go.

"OK then. Good luck tomorrow, and I'll see you at lunch," Katniss said, looking over at Peeta but not quite meeting his gaze. She turned and walked away into the night.

Peeta watched her until he realized that Madge was watching him. "What?" he said.

She just raised her eyebrows at him with a smile and turned towards her sleeping bag.

* * *

Peeta and Madge were finishing up lunch with their campers when Katniss came wandering up to their table.

"So, you made it out alive, I see," she said.

"We did!" Madge said enthusiastically! "Peeta's a much better navigator than I."

"Well, I'm not colorblind, so, you know," he said. "By the way, have you heard the news?"

Both girls looked wide-eyed at him. "Guess who are hooking up?" he said.

"Who?" Madge practically squealed as Katniss' face grew guarded.

"Glimmer and Dalton," he said.

"No way!" Madge said. "They hooked up last summer! Wonder if it's something more than just a fling?"

As Madge turned over the implications of this news, Peeta watched Katniss. Her face had frozen into a blank expression he couldn't read. Peeta wasn't sure how to take this, but he figured she'd be better off on her own to process the news.

"Well, time to go get these guys packed up and ready for the parents," he said, getting up from the table. "See y'all later."

* * *

Peeta didn't see Katniss again that afternoon. He and Dalton spent some time cleaning up the mud and grime that had accumulated in the cabin over the course of the week, and then Peeta collapsed on his bunk.

He woke to Finnick banging on his door. "Get up, get up, young man. We're going out!"

Peeta groaned, rolling over, heavy with sleep.

"C'mon, man! I've barely seen you this week. I need an update!"

Peeta sat up and rubbed his head. "I need a shower."

"Well hurry up. We're going into town where there are approximately two places to eat. Of course, they're owned by the same person and the menus are identical, but I'll let you make the choice."

"OK, OK," Peeta said. "Give me ten minutes."

Twenty minutes later, Peeta found himself crammed into a booth surrounded by faces that were not the one he wanted to see. The bar speakers were blasting the Black Crows, and people were singing along with what all of North Georgia considered a hometown band.

He found himself sitting between Clove and Thresh, neither of whom he had spent any time with. "So Peeta," Clove shouted above the music, "I know your brother Ben."

It was almost too loud to have a conversation, and this conversation was definitely not one he wanted to have. "Yeah? Do you go to UGA, too?"

"Yeah! He's a great friend of mine!"

Peeta noticed Finnick making funny faces at him from the other end of the table. "Well, that's nice."

"Where do you go to school?"

"Emory."

"Do you like it?"

"Yeah. It's great."

"Too bad you're not in Athens," she shouted. "We could go out!"

Peeta took a long drink of his beer. "Mmm hmm."

"I'm sure I'll end up living in Atlanta once I graduate. I'm not going back to Conyers, that's for sure!"

"No one goes back to Conyers," said Thresh, looking bored.

The song playing ended, and after a pause, "Smells Like Teen Spirit" cranked through the speaker behind their booth. Clove squealed and began talking about all the flannel she had bought the previous winter. "I wish I had some with me now! It's kinda chilly tonight!" she said earnestly. Peeta tried not to roll his eyes.

Suddenly Finnick was yelling across the restaurant. "Jo! Hey! Jo!" Peeta looked up to see a slender girl with what could only be called punk rock hair walking towards the table. "When did you get here?"

"Finn," she said in a low voice. "Good to see you man."

Only then did Peeta see Katniss and Madge following behind the girl. They congregated around Finnick.

"Who's that?" Peeta asked Clove.

"Johanna Mason," she replied. "She was a Grub here for several years, but she's doing something else this summer."

Peeta watched as the four laughed at something before Johanna said, "All right then, Finn, we'll hang out tomorrow afternoon. I'll be at Kat's place." With that, the women made their way over to another table.

Peeta enjoyed talking with Thresh, with whom he found he had much in common. Thresh had grown up working in his family's restaurant and had come to Camp Ridgecrest with similar motives. By the end of the night, Peeta found the beer had only made him tired, and then Clove began smoking, which had made the girl even more irritating. So when Thresh mentioned he was heading back, Peeta decided to bum a ride.

He got up and made his way around the table, saying his goodbyes. As he walked to the door with Thresh, he looked over to see Katniss and Madge watching him. He waved as he ducked out the door.

He'd taken just a few steps outside on the sidewalk when he heard Katniss calling his name. He turned around and tried not to smile too broadly. "Hello."

"Hey," she said, shoving her hands down into the pockets of her jeans. "Having a good night?"

"Mmm hmm. You?"

"Yeah." She paused. "So, I guess I lost the bet."

"No surprise there."

"Yeah. OK, so I owe you lunch. Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow works for me. You? I know your friend is in town." He really hoped she would not postpone.

"No, it's OK. Johanna will be occupied with Finnick tomorrow. I can get away. For a bit," she hedged.

"Sounds good. Where and when?"

"I guess, meet me in front of the dining hall at, say, eleven. Does that work?"

"You do know that taking me to lunch in the dining hall does not count, right?"

She grinned. _Finally,_ he thought. "I have a plan," she said, backing up and heading back to the restaurant. "See you tomorrow!"

This time Peeta did not bother to stifle his smile.

* * *

She was sitting on the porch steps waiting for him as he walked up the next morning. She pointed to his t-shirt. "You like the Ramones?"

He looked down at his shirt. "Yeah." She was squinting up at him. "What?"

"Trying to imagine you at a punk show, with your blonde curls and your neatly pressed jeans."

"Wow. Insults already."

She smiled and stood up. "Come on. My car's this way.

"What is this car?" Peeta asked incredulously as they walked up to the small, olive green hatchback in front of him.

"Hey, don't make fun of my car!"

"I'm not! I just don't know what it is."

"It's a '79 Volkswagen Dasher," she said, unlocking her door and leaning through to unlock his. "I think they only made them for, like, three years or something."

"Uh huh," he said, looking around the interior. "Not quite as sporty as the Cabriolet nor as practical as the station wagon. I can see why they discontinued it."

"You don't have to ride in it, you know," she fussed, starting the engine. An initial thunderous roar subsided into a soft but consistent putter as a cloud of smoke erupted from the tail pipe.

"Is this diesel?" he asked, incredulous again. "The environmentalist drives a diesel?"

"It was 1979! The oil crisis! My parents thought it was a good idea to buy diesel!" She looked exasperated, but she was smiling. Peeta made a mental note. _Responds well to teasing._

"So, what do you drive? Let me guess. A Saab. No, some kind of convertible."

"An '86 Suburban," he said. "We use it for bakery deliveries."

"Sure," she said.

Peeta let out a sound of frustration before saying, "You know, you are difficult."

That smile again.

"So where are we going?"

"You'll see."

As Katniss pulled the car onto Route 2, Peeta noticed the small box propped between the dash and the gear shift. He picked it up. "What is this?"

"The sound system."

"Nice. This must be the oldest tape player I have ever seen."

"Yeah, I think it's technically a recorder, like what reporters use. But it's better than nothing since the radio doesn't work."

Peeta had popped open the cassette case and was holding up the homemade tape inside.

"And this is...?"

She squinted at it. "Just a mix. There are some more tapes scattered about."

He began pulling tapes from the foot well of the car. Most were mix tapes, though some were labeled with album titles. He discarded the Pixies and the Replacements. "Here we go," he said, popping a tape in and hitting rewind.

"What is it?"

"You'll see." The rewind clicked off, and Peeta pressed play. The opening chords of "How Soon Is Now" filtered out of the tiny speaker.

"You like the Smiths? Seems a little depressing for you."

"I am large, I contain multitudes," he said solemnly.

"You're quoting Whitman to me? Seriously?"

"I know. What a douche. No, I just took a poetry class last semester, and that line stuck with me."

"Are you an English major?"

Peeta barked out a laugh. "No. Business. Family thing."

For a while the road was four lanes, but soon enough, it dwindled to two with a passing lane periodically. Katniss pointed out different landmarks or points of interest while she drove. The road began to climb into the steep mountains with sharp twists and turns causing her to downshift repeatedly.

"This isn't an easy road to drive," Peeta observed.

"I do it all the time. This is the way I go to school."

"So you really are not going to tell me where we are going?"

She smiled. "Have you heard of Brasstown Bald?"

"Uh. Heard of it, I think. I'm not sure what it is."

"It's the highest point in Georgia. There's a monument there and a lookout."

"And they serve lunch?"

"Well, no. A friend of mine owns a restaurant nearby. We'll eat lunch there, and then if you want to see the Bald, we can go after." She glanced over at him. "Hope that's OK."

"Sounds great. What kind of food is it?"

"Southern. She only makes one meal each day, and it's served family-style. So you end up eating with whoever else happens to be there at these big tables. The vegetables are incredible."

The road had grown steep, and the car strained under the grade of the road. Katniss grimaced as the noise of the engine increased. "Don't worry," she said. "We'll make it. I've done it before."

"I wasn't going to say a thing," he said, taking in the lush green mountains out the window.

Soon Katniss was slowing down and pulling off the road. Nestled back in the woods, Peeta could see a large, white house with a wrap-around porch. A sign in the yard read, 'Sae's House.'

Katniss pulled the car into a spot and got out. She looked over at him nervously. Peeta wasn't sure why the mood between them had shifted, but he followed her up the porch steps and held the door for her as she walked inside.

"Hey Katniss!" said a girl standing in the foyer of the house. "So good to see you! I'll let Sae know you're here." She disappeared down a hallway.

Peeta was looking around the foyer when he heard Sae coming down the hall.

"Hey, Sae," said Katniss, walking to meet the older woman.

Sae enveloped Katniss in a big hug, saying, "Baby girl." She kissed her cheek and then took a step back from Katniss, still holding her. "Happy birthday."

Katniss blushed a deep red as Peeta's eyes widened, staring at her.

"Thanks, Sae," she said softly. She cleared her throat. "I want you to meet Peeta Mellark. He's working at Ridgecrest this summer."

Sae gave Peeta her hand while looking at him closely. "You're not by chance related to the Mellark family who used to own a bakery in Ellijay, are you?"

"Yes ma'am," Peeta said. "It was my grandfather's, and then my father ran it for a few years after he died. But he sold it when I was thirteen, and we moved back to Atlanta."

Sae smiled. "I'm so glad to meet you. Katniss never brings friends with her."

Peeta stole a quick glance at Katniss, who was blushing again.

"It's really nice to meet you, too. And I've heard such good things about your cooking. Can't wait for dinner."

"Well, y'all just make your way into the dining room there. Find some empty seats. We've got pork tenderloin today with asparagus, sweet potatoes, and summer squash."

"Sounds delicious," Peeta said, following Katniss towards the dining room.

They sat at a table with a family of five who had just arrived. The waitress made her way over to them to get their drink orders. "Sweet tea?" Peeta asked as the waitress nodded.

"Careful," Katniss mumbled after ordering water. "Sae's sweet tea is really sweet."

"Only way to drink it," he said.

In some ways, Peeta was glad for the distraction of small talk with the other diners. Katniss hadn't yet recovered from her embarrassment earlier, and the dynamic between them was no longer easy.

The waitress soon began bringing huge plates of food to the table. As they passed the plates around, Sae emerged from the kitchen with a large basket of bread. She approached Peeta.

"Peeta, your grandfather gave me my first job. He taught me everything I know about baking. In fact, this cornbread recipe is his," she said, placing a golden yellow triangle on his plate.

"You're kidding!" Peeta said. "I can't believe it." Peeta took a bite of the delicate bread. "That's his recipe, all right. Doesn't even need butter. Delicious, Sae."

"Once you finish your meal, why don't y'all join me for coffee in my study? And we can talk more."

"I'd like that," Peeta said as Sae moved off around the table. He turned to Katniss. "How do you know Sae?"

"She's one of my father's cousins," Katniss said. "We didn't really know her when we were little, but about a year after my dad died, she moved back to Ellijay. She helped take care of us after that."

"Where was your mom?"

She shrugged. "She was still there. Sort of. When my dad died, my mom just kinda checked out. She was gone at work or elsewhere most of the time. We didn't really see her much."

Peeta couldn't believe what he was hearing. "But you were only, what, twelve? Thirteen? How did you get by before Sae showed up?"

"I don't know. We just did. But then Sae came home and things changed. I don't think we'd have made it without her."

Peeta looked at Katniss a moment. "She seems really great."

"Yeah. She is."

* * *

They spent nearly an hour in Sae's study as she told him stories of his grandparents. It was like a locked door suddenly opening in a house he'd lived in all his life. The older woman knew things about his own family that he'd never heard. How his grandparents came to Ellijay from Asheville when his father was just a little boy. How his grandmother's mother had emigrated from Ireland. But mostly she had stories from the bakery, so familiar in some ways but entirely new.

"I don't think your father ever really wanted to leave Ellijay," she said, putting down her empty coffee cup. "But your grandparents insisted he go to college, and so he left, and I guess he met your mama in Atlanta, and that was that for him. When did y'all move back up here?"

"In 1977, right after my grandfather died."

"Mmm hmm," she said, thinking. "And when did your grandmother pass?"

"A few years later. I have some great memories of her." He ran his hand through his hair. Katniss was watching him, and he smiled at her. "Dad says I look like my grandfather, but we don't have too many pictures."

Sae smiled at him. "Yes. The curl of your hair is his, but there's something else, too. The set of your face, I guess. The easiness to it. Wait a second," she said, interrupting her own train of thought. She got up and went over to her desk in the corner of the room. She pulled out a wooden box and began rifling through it. Peeta glanced over at Katniss, who was watching him.

Finding what she was looking for, Sae walked back to Peeta and handed him a small photograph.

"That's your grandparents standing in front of the bakery. Must have been 1946 or thereabouts. Soon after they came down from Asheville."

He was struck by seeing his grandparents so young. They couldn't have been much older than Peeta himself. Peeta recognized his grandmother a little bit from a picture he'd seen on his father's desk, but his grandfather's youthful face smiling back at him was new. He had never seen it before. He could just see the resemblance Sae had spoken of. The sign for Mellark's Bakery hung just above their heads. His grandfather's arm was wrapped about his grandmother's waist, and she was looking up at him. They looked happy.

Peeta began to hand the picture back to Sae, but she said, "No, no child. You keep that. It's yours."

He felt his chest tighten. "Thank you. This means so much to me."

* * *

Peeta was deep in thought as they walked back out to her car. The time with Sae made him feel a connection to his family that he had never really felt before.

Katniss broke the silence by giving options. "We can head on back to camp, or we could go just a little ways up the road. From the Brasstown Bald parking lot, the path is about a thirty minute climb. Steep but not too bad."

"Definitely the Bald. I'm still so full. A hike will do me good."

So he found himself back in the car as it strained its way up the remainder of the road. Once they parked, Peeta followed Katniss to the path. She was right: the hike was steep and left little room for conversation as they walked.

Reaching the summit, Katniss steered him towards a stone wall below the observation tower. He watched her stand on a bench and hoist herself up on the wall with her feet dangling below. Peeta followed suit and was rewarded with a breathtaking view of mountains and lakes stretched out before him. The wind cooled the sweat on his neck. "Wow."

"We're facing North Carolina right now," she said. "I always like to sit here, but we can go up to the tower, too. Up there you can see Georgia, Tennessee, and both Carolinas."

"It's such a relief to see this," he said. "Living in Atlanta, you begin to think the world is just one big strip mall."

"My dad used to bring us up here sometimes," she said. The wind cutting through the valley picked up strands of her hair. "He used to say that to figure out your problems, you have to see all of your surroundings."

"And what problems are you trying to figure out today?"

She gave him a small smile but changed the subject instead. "So you're at Emory, right?" As he nodded, she continued, "Do you like it there?"

"I do," he said, but he was aware his tone wasn't very convincing.

"But..."

"But...I think I would like it more if the circumstances were different," he confessed. "It honestly hasn't been the great life change that I always thought college would be."

"Why not?"

"Well, it's kinda complicated." He paused to gather his thoughts. "You see, neither one of my brothers tried very hard in school. They both wanted to go to UGA, and you pretty much just need a pulse to get in, so they really wasted a lot of time in both high school and now also in college."

He shrugged as he glanced at her. "It was different for me. I always liked school, and studying was easier for me, I guess. Anyway, I got some scholarship money from Emory, and for my mom..." He swallowed. "Well, she likes being able to say that she has a son at Emory. But even with the scholarship, the only way we could afford it was for me to live at home.

"So for the last two years, I've been living pretty much like I did in high school. Still at home, working in the bakery, just driving to Emory for class instead of driving to high school."

"Sucks."

"Well, no, it doesn't. I mean, I love my classes. I know I'm getting a great education. But I just get these glimpses of what I might have had if I'd gotten the true college experience. That's really why I'm here this summer. Just so I could experience something different, you know?"

"Yeah. It must feel like you're in thirteenth grade or something."

"That's it exactly," he nodded. "Exactly right."

They sat for awhile before he broke the silence again. "So what about you? Young Harris is only a two-year school, right? What are you going to do this fall?"

"Well, I've gotten an internship with the Fernbank Science Center starting in August."

"In Atlanta?" He kept his tone neutral.

"Yeah."

"What about school?"

"That's the question. I got into Georgia Tech, but I'm still scrounging for scholarship money. I may have to get there and work a little while and see what kind of money I can make."

"You're going to be in Atlanta. I'm not sure I can picture you on a city street."

"It'll be a change, that's for sure." She pulled her feet up and pivoted so she could jump down off of the wall. "Let's head up to the tower."

* * *

They were mostly quiet on the way back down the path. As they approached the parking lot, Peeta said, "This has been an incredible day."

He was rewarded with another small smile.

In her silence, Peeta had to ask. "Did you know that Sae knew my grandparents?"

"Yes."

"Is that why you brought me here?"

They reached the driver's side of the car and stopped by her door. She smiled and looked away. "Yeah."

"Katniss. Thank you."

When she looked back up at him, he stepped forward, putting his arms around her to hug her gently. He felt her shoulders give a little, her body soften slightly, but her arms remained at her sides.

"Happy birthday," he murmured, letting her go.

Back in the car, the conversation returned to the safe haven of music as they made their way back down the mountain to camp.

* * *

**A/N** Before anyone gets offended... In the 80's and 90's, practically anyone could gain acceptance to the University of Georgia – thus explaining Peeta's comment. The school had not yet shaken the stain of scandal when Jan Kemp sued the school for demoting her after she complained that school officials had enabled football players to pass a course that they had originally failed. In 1993, however, when the lottery began funding the HOPE Scholarship, admission standards slowly increased, and now it is more difficult to get in as an undergraduate.

I've fudged a bit the description of the Brasstown Bald parking area, in case anyone out there has been and realizes it.

Thanks to everyone who has reviewed or followed this story or begun following me on tumblr. I hope you're enjoying it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.

And finally, my grateful, heartfelt thanks go to ZenLeigh (BohemianRider) and LollerCakes for their feedback and support.


	4. Chapter 4: Walking Away

By the time Katniss turned the car down the long driveway leading to Camp Ridgecrest, she had convinced herself that she was ready to walk away from Peeta Mellark. It was a relief, really, to have repaid the debt from so long ago.

It had been a great afternoon, she could concede that, and she liked him. But it was clear that he wanted more, and she knew she couldn't give him that. As she parked the car and got out, she steeled herself, preparing to give him the brush-off.

They started down the path that led towards the cabins. He was talking about something, but she was only marginally following the conversation. When they reached the bridge that led to the meadow and her cabin, she turned to him, ready to make her intentions clear.

He gave her a big smile and reached for her hand. "I can't thank you enough for this day," he said, squeezing her fingers gently.

_This is it_, she thought, but before she could speak, he continued, "Happy birthday. Hope you have fun with Johanna." He dropped her hand and began to walk away.

"Thanks," she called.

He turned around, still walking, "I'll see you."

Katniss stood for a moment watching him walk away before crossing the bridge. She wasn't sure what had just happened.

Had she misjudged the situation? Misjudged him? She felt sure he was interested in her, could tell by the way he looked at her. Or at least, she thought she could. She had fully expected him to try to kiss her. She had thought he would try to make plans to see her again. But he hadn't done either.

As she walked into her cabin, she had to admit that Peeta had thrown her, but regardless, she was done with him. He had made it easy on her, really.

"Hello?" she called, putting her keys down the table.

"Back here!" she heard Johanna reply.

She walked back to her small bedroom to find Jo and Madge sitting on her bed with their backs propped up against the wall. "Where's Finnick?"

"He was here. He had dinner plans, but he may come back later."

Katniss sat down in her desk chair and looked at them. She knew what was coming.

"So?" asked Madge. "Spill it. What happened?"

"There's really not much to tell," she said. "We drove up to Sae's House for lunch and then went up to Brasstown Bald. And then came home."

"Did you kiss him?"

"No."

"Katniss! Why not!" Madge was looking exasperated. "You _like_ him!"

"Madge, I didn't kiss him because I don't want to date him! I don't want to date anyone! You know this already!"

"But you _want_ to kiss him."

Jo cocked an eyebrow. "Hell, even I want to suck face with him, and he is totally not my type." Katniss and Madge looked at Jo. "What?" she said, shrugging.

Katniss sighed. "It doesn't matter anyway. He didn't even try to kiss me."

"What?" said Madge. "I can't believe that. I know he likes you."

"Well, whatever. It's over. I have no plans to see him again. It was a nice afternoon, but now it's over. Can we please just celebrate my birthday?"

Jo reached over the side of the bed, rummaged in her backpack, and pulled out a bottle of tequila. "Will this do?"

Madge started laughing as Katniss sighed and said, "Perfect."

* * *

"Who's getting hungry?" Madge asked several hours later. The night had progressed and the bottle had dwindled, so none of them were in a position to drive anywhere.

"Where is Finnick?" Jo complained. "I need him!"

"Wouldn't be the first time," muttered Katniss.

"Honey, just because I am not repressed like you..."

"Let's go find Peeta!"

Katniss and Jo both looked at Madge.

"No!"

"Great idea. Which cabin is his?"

"No!" Katniss said again.

"B-9," Madge supplied.

"Y'all," Katniss whined, "he's probably not even there. It's Saturday night! He'll be out for sure."

"Nope, we're going." Jo said. "And you're coming too. If he's not there, we'll find someone to take us somewhere."

Madge and Jo laughed their way down the path while Katniss skulked along. She felt way too sober for this venture. As they approached Peeta's cabin, she saw the cabin lights were on. _Please let it be Dalton, please let it be Dalton._ Hell, she would've been happy for it to have been Dalton and Glimmer. She had never in her whole life wanted so much to interrupt a couple having sex. She held back as they walked up to the door, but Madge grabbed her arm to pull her forward as Johanna began to bellow.

"Peeta? Peee-tahhh! Hellooo, Peeee-tahhh!" She was so intent on yelling that she didn't notice when he appeared behind the screen door.

"Yeah, right here." He looked them over. "What are you, the Triumvirate?"

Madge began to giggle again as Jo opened the door. "I'm Jo! Nice to meet ya. Are you interested in taking us somewhere so we can get something to eat?"

"Absolutely not," he replied, scoffing at this suggestion. Katniss, already embarrassed, wanted to die right there on the ground.

"Please, Peeta," Madge complained. "We're starving! You don't want us driving out like this, do you?"

"No, but I also don't want to chauffeur three drunk girls for the rest of the night." He looked at Katniss. "Do you have a kitchen in your cabin?"

"Yeah."

"Anything I can cook?"

"Um, probably."

Madge squealed and clapped her hands. "Cook for us, Peeta!"

"That, I'll do."

* * *

Back at her cabin, Katniss led the way into the kitchen as Madge and Jo began pouring another round. Poking through the refrigerator, Peeta found eggs and bacon. "Can I use these?" he asked.

"Sure."

"Any bread?"

"If it's not moldy, it's in the pantry."

"Hmm. And cinnamon?"

"Not sure. You can look."

"How do you not know if you have cinnamon?" He disappeared into the pantry. "It's one of the most basic spices."

"Excuse me, Betty Crocker."

"That's a tired joke." He returned with a loaf of bread, cinnamon, sugar, and vanilla. "OK, I will use this bread, but I will deny it if you ever mention it to anyone. And the next time I go home, I'm bringing you some actual good bread. Now, I need a cookie sheet and a frying pan."

"The only pans I have are in that cabinet there," she said, pointing.

He blew his bangs out of his eyes in frustration. "Well, I'm thinking French toast, if that's OK? Wait a minute, I'm doing this for you, so yeah, I think it's OK!"

She laughed as he pulled out a cookie sheet from the cabinet. "Foil?"

"Second drawer." She watched as he began arranging bacon on the cookie sheet.

"So this is a surprising way to spend your birthday. I mean, most people go out for their twenty-first birthday. Big night out and all that."

"Uh, this is only twenty for me."

"Wow. Young-un. I'll be twenty-one in October."

"I know. I've always been the youngest of the group."

"The youngest and the most inhibited," Jo announced, coming in with their shot glasses. "Peeta, you'll need to grab another glass from the cabinet so you can join us!"

"Tequila and French toast?" he said with a grimace.

"C'mon, no room for connoisseurs," Jo said, reaching across him to the cabinet and pulling a glass.

"OK, but then everyone out of the kitchen. There's barely room for one in here."

Jo shoved a glass in Peeta's hand and then raised her own. "To our little kitty-kat on her birthday. May this be the year you finally break out and enjoy life a little."

"Indeed!" Madge seconded.

* * *

Peeta appeared some time later with a huge stack of French toast and enough bacon to feed a cabin full of middle schoolers.

"Peeta, you are the best," sighed Madge, giving him an impromptu hug.

"Yeah, well, it takes a special man to make French toast."

"You mean one confident in his sexuality?" Jo smirked.

"Exactly."

Katniss couldn't help sneaking looks around the table as they ate. How did this happen? She was supposed to cut ties with Peeta, and yet here he was, crammed underneath her small kitchen table hanging out with two of her best friends – who clearly both liked him.

"We got dishes," Madge said once they finished, pulling Jo up with her.

Katniss watched them disappear into the kitchen and then looked over at Peeta. "I have to check out your albums," he said. Her stereo sat on top of a milk crate next to another milk crate full of albums. As he stepped over to flip through her records, she stood up to carry the syrup back to the kitchen.

"Get back in there. What are you doing?" whispered Madge.

"Nothing! He's looking at my music."

Jo took her by the shoulders and turned her back around, saying loudly, "Oh no, the birthday girl doesn't get to help clean the kitchen!" She gave her a gentle push and whispered, "You can do this, Katniss."

Peeta was now sitting on the floor looking at _Reckoning. "_I'm stuck," he said, turning it over. "I gotta say. I love CDs. Love them. They're so convenient. But there's nothing like seeing the artwork on an album."

"Totally," she said, sitting down in the chair closest to him. "I can't bring myself to make the jump to CDs. The record player was my father's, and I feel like, I don't know, he would like that I'm still using it."

He was looking at her as she spoke. "I'm sure he would," he said. They were quiet a moment, and Katniss realized she'd been staring at him for too long. She cleared her throat. "Pick out something for us to listen to."

He looked back down at the stack, grinning. "Do you have _anything_ from our current decade?"

"I've had trouble moving on from 80's alternative," she said with an apologetic smile. "I mean, I like Nirvana as much as the next girl, but," she pointed to the album in his hands, "REM was doing the same thing five years ago. I don't know why everyone thinks it's so new."

"Yeah, but the 90's have totally sucked for them. If I hear "Shiny Happy People" one more time I may go postal." Peeta flipped for a minute more before finding one and unsheathing the album. He put it on the turn table and counted out the grooves to play the song he wanted. "What Is Life" began playing.

"That was one of my father's albums. He loved George Harrison," she said, smiling.

"I love this song. I always thought he got overlooked."

They listened for awhile until she yawned. She tried to stifle it.

"I should go," he said.

"I'm fine. Don't let me run you off."

"You won't," he said easily, standing up, "but I need to go just the same. Junior high week starts tomorrow, and I've got to track down Clove in the morning so we can do some planning."

"Have fun with that," she said. She stuck her head around the corner into the kitchen. "Peeta's leaving."

"Bye, Peeta," came Madge and Jo's voices in unison.

"See y'all later," he called, walking to the door.

"Thanks for cooking for us. I'm sorry we bothered you. I, uh, I tried to stop them."

He stopped and turned towards her. She wanted to flinch. She wanted to look away, but she forced herself to meet his gaze. She could feel her face begin to color. He looked at her with a small smile. "I'm glad you bothered me. See you soon?"

She nodded as he opened the door and walked out. She watched him through the screen until he had disappeared into the darkness.

* * *

On Wednesday morning, Haymitch found her underneath one of the girls' cabins.

"Mornin' sweetheart," he said.

"Hey, Haymitch, glad you're here." She pulled herself out from under the building. "This cabin's going to need work on its foundation at the end of the summer." He followed as she walked around the side of it. "Some kudzu had grown up to the cabin in the spring, right here. We cut it back, but I guess we didn't get it all. There's more now growing underneath the floor."

"I'll make a note of it."

"It's just that I'm leaving as soon as camp ends, so I won't be here to take care of it."

"Katniss," he said, putting his hand on her shoulder, "we are going to miss you. Believe me. But you can leave us, you know. We'll survive."

"I know. I just feel bad that I'm leaving you short staffed. I can't believe you didn't have any applicants for this scholarship."

"Well, not everyone's happy to live in the middle of nowhere like you are. Now, when do classes start for you?"

"Uh, well, not until September, but I think I'm going to end up taking the semester off."

"And why is that?"

"What do you think? Money. I've only got about half of my tuition covered, and that's not including books or fees or anything like that. I'll probably end up having to find a second job."

"What about housing?"

"Johanna's got room in her house. Her roommate is moving out mid-July, so I think I can afford that."

"Have you deferred to Tech yet?"

"No. I won't have to until the last minute."

"Huh. Well, I came to find you for a reason. Clove is sick, and Peeta's got to take the group camping tonight. Can you fill in?"

* * *

Katniss got up to the meadow early. She had originally been nervous about the task ahead of her, but really, this was her area of expertise. Camping and hiking – this was her comfort zone. And what kind of professional was she if she allowed the presence of a single individual to unnerve her?

By the time Peeta appeared at the edge of the meadow with his group, Katniss had started the fire. He walked up to her, pulling the huge, rolling cooler that contained the food for the night.

"Hey," he said. "Thanks so much for helping me out."

"No problem. It's one of my unofficial duties."

"Yeah, I can't imagine what your job description must look like."

"Ever expanding."

The campers had put their gear down and were milling around. "All right everyone," Peeta yelled to get their attention. "First we need to gather firewood. Grab a partner and go scrounge around. Once that's done, we'll play some games."

Peeta and Katniss worked companionably, getting the hobo dinners put together and ready for the fire. Each foil packet received a hamburger patty, some sliced carrots and potatoes, and a dash of salt and pepper.

As the campers began emerging from the tree line, Katniss organized the stacks of firewood. Two boys trudged back into the meadow pulling a log large enough to keep the fire burning for days. She waited for them to reach her, watching them struggle under the weight of the fallen tree.

"Hey boys. So where did you find this monster?"

They looked proud and puffed put their chests. "Next to the creek," one of them replied.

"This is a huge find. It could keep this fire going for a long time. But there's something I want you to think about next time: this is really more than we need. Now, it's not a big deal 'cause we'll leave it here for the group coming tomorrow night." She paused and smiled at them. "But I want you to think about how we treat the woods. There are certainly things we need from it, but we want to have as little impact as possible. Does that make sense?"

The boys nodded and looked sheepish. "Really," she emphasized. "It's OK." The boys walked away, and she turned around to see Peeta smiling at her. She shrugged and said, "I'll get the games going if you want to finish up here?"

The evening was fun. It was a Ridgecrest tradition during junior high week for campers and counselors alike to stand up and give some sort of performance around the campfire. Peeta's group had a number of dominant personalities that kept everyone entertained. Two girls gave their rendition of the sword fight scene from _The Princess Bride_, acting it out with the entire crowd singing out the line, _"I am not left handed!"_

The boys who had hauled in the log, who Katniss had learned were Jason and Jonathan, performed "Jeremy" for the crowd.

Margaret, a girl Katniss had bonded with earlier over their mutual love of dandelions, rose quietly and looked around.

"One of my favorite poets is Mary Oliver," she said, "and this is her poem called, "Sleeping in the Forest." I hope you like it. I learned it especially for tonight since we're, like, you know, sleeping in the forest."

_I thought the earth remembered me, _

_she took me back so tenderly, _

_arranging her dark skirts, her pockets _

_full of lichens and seeds. _

_I slept as never before, a stone on the river bed, _

_nothing between me and the white fire of the stars _

_but my thoughts, and they flowed light as moths _

_among the branches of the perfect trees. _

_All night I heard the small kingdoms _

_breathing around me, the insects, _

_and the birds who do their work in the darkness. _

_All night I rose and fell, as if in water, _

_grappling with a luminous doom. By morning _

_I had vanished at least a dozen times _

_into something better. _

The girls sitting around Margaret clapped and cheered loudly as she sat down.

Next, a boy named Patrick, who had remained quiet throughout most of the trip, stood and said simply, _"I gave her my heart, and she gave me a pen."_

"Ugh," cried Peeta, rolling on the ground. "The worst! Stomp on my heart right now!" The kids laughed. "No really. How can you not love that scene?" he said.

"You _are_ Lloyd Dobler, Peeta," Margaret said to him, her eyes shining as she gazed at him.

Katniss could see for herself that Peeta was a natural with kids. He treated them like peers, but he was somehow able to maintain his role of authority – a feat, really, to accomplish with thirteen and fourteen year olds.

From the relative privacy of darkness, Katniss found herself watching him as the evening wore on, firelight flashing in his eyes and casting flickering shadows in his golden hair.

"OK Peeta," said Ben, a boy who had attended the camp for five years in a row. "Your turn. What do you have for us?"

"I fear I have no talents adequate for this show," he said. "I bake. I cook. I can even paint you a picture, but as for entertainment, I'm afraid all I have is my strength." He looked around and sighed. "But I might be able to do something. I think I'm going to need a volunteer for this one."

Margaret instantly shot up her hand, along with half of the other girls in the group. Peeta turned around the circle, taking inventory. "Hmm. Mmm hmm. Well, let's see. Katniss, do you think you're up to it?"

Katniss felt her heart and stomach drop. Her arms and legs felt limp, and she looked up at him, begging him with her eyes to let her be. But he crooked his finger at her and said, "Nope. If I'm going to fulfill my duties here, I'm going to need you to assist me."

She stood and warily walked over to him. "We're going to need some spotters." Instantly there were campers standing up around them. "Ben, Jonathan, Robert, I want the three of you to stay underneath her. One on each side, and one directly in front. If she falls, I'll catch her, but you'll be my back-up, OK?"

Katniss felt her eyes go wide, but he gave her a reassuring look as he turned to the campers. "I'm going to bench press Katniss."

"Are you kidding me?" Katniss asked with clear disdain.

"C'mon, Kat," shouted Margaret.

She sighed and said, "OK. What do I do?"

"I'm going to support your back and legs, but you'll need to completely straighten your body. Stay as stiff as you can." She looked at him incredulously. "It takes strong abs. Think you're up to it?"

She was annoyed at the implication. "Yes," she said.

Standing next to her, he reached down and scooped her up in his arms. "It's OK," he said to her quietly. "Trust me." And she was surprised to find that, really, she did trust him.

He maneuvered his hands and began lifting her. She lay back, contracting her stomach to hold herself rigid. She could feel one of his hands at her lower thighs while the other one was splayed across her back.

"Boys," said Peeta, "stay close!" He looked at her. "You're OK, Katniss. I've got you, and I'm not going to let you fall."

And then he was lifting her in the air. The descent was quick, and then she was rising back up again. She tried to keep as still as possible as he raised her again and again with seeming ease. The kids cheered and counted his reps. When they got to fifteen, she heard him say, "Last one," before lifting her up again.

Only this time, she was rising in the air with more speed. She realized he had let go of her and she was suspended in air a split second before she felt him catch her securely in his arms.

Her head was against Peeta's chest, and Katniss thought she could feel every ounce of blood coursing through her veins. She closed her eyes and stayed in the moment as pandemonium broke out around them, the campers cheering raucously.

And then he released her. She felt his hand press her back to steady her as she tried to regain her balance. "Wow," she said. "I've never flown before." The kids laughed around her. "That can't be one of your wrestling moves."

"I may have some cheerleading in my background," he said. The kids dissolved at this information but he just smiled at her.

"Cheerleading?"

"Yep. I am large..."

"I know. You contain multitudes," she finished for him as she began to make her way back to her previous seat.

"Wait, Katniss," Jason called. "What about you? What's your entertainment for us?"

"You mean being tossed into the air wasn't enough?" she asked with an incredulous tone.

"No!" came the chorus around her.

"Give us a song, Katniss," said Ben, who'd heard her sing in summers past.

The rest picked up the call, turning it into a chant. "Katniss! Katniss! Katniss!"

Katniss blushed profusely as she faced them. "All right, all right," she said, quieting them down and looking around as the kids sat back down at her feet. She took a deep breath. "So, this is a song my father used to sing to me when I was little. And… Well, here goes."

She looked around again, her eyes resting on Peeta. He was staring at her so intently, she felt her stomach drop and her nerves flare out of nowhere. She cleared her throat and tried to reorder her thoughts.

"It's called, 'Down in the Valley.'"

_Down in the valley, valley so low_

_Hang your head over, hear the wind blow_

_Hear the wind blow, dear, hear the wind blow;_

_Hang your head over, hear the wind blow._

_Roses love sunshine, violets love dew,_

_Angels in Heaven know I love you,_

_Know I love you, dear, know I love you,_

_Angels in Heaven know I love you._

_Down in the valley, valley so low_

_Hang your head over, hear the wind blow_

_Hear the wind blow, dear, hear the wind blow;_

_Hang your head over, hear the wind blow._

The campers cheered as she finished. She bowed low for them before sitting back down. She waited until the group had quieted and the kids were no longer looking at her before daring to look over at Peeta. She found Peeta looking at her and smiling, miming a clapping motion. She smiled but looked away.

Later that night, Katniss lay in her sleeping bag on the girls' side of the meadow wishing she could somehow banish the thoughts in the back of her mind that plagued her whenever he was around. When she was faced with a task or was busy focusing on something, she could relax around him, but whenever her head took over, her inhibitions crept in and her anxiety increased ten-fold.

She didn't want to be like this, but she also didn't know how else to be. She took a deep breath. She adjusted her sleeping bag so she could see the moon more easily. She breathed another slow, deep breath and allowed the call of the cicadas to lull her to sleep.

* * *

Katniss had always had the uncanny ability to sleep long and deeply outside. Regardless of rocks or roots under her sleeping bag, even when waking up soaked through with dew or rain, the sounds of the woods, the smell of a campfire, the dark sky above her head managed to soothe her worries and allow her absorbing sleep.

And so she woke up refreshed and happy the next morning despite her troubled thoughts of the night before. She bantered easily with the kids as they fixed breakfast, and the mood around the campfire was in turn lighthearted.

The kids made for great hiking. Despite a mixture of seasoned backpackers and complete novices, the group worked in unison, sharing information, encouraging, and choosing to stay in a single group instead of splitting up according to ability.

They had just begun a game of movie quotes when they reached the clearing. "OK," said Jason, "now we're doing movie quotes that have anything to do with being lost. Who's first?"

_"Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore!"_ shouted a girl who had collapsed in some shade.

_"It's a glow-in-the-dark compass ring. So you don't get lost,"_ came a shout from the azaleas.

The kids had settled in the clearing, some picking flowers while others rested under the sun. Katniss made her way over to the bank of azaleas. She dug around in her pack, pulled out her hiker's loop, and began turning over the leaves carefully.

"What are you doing?" Peeta was behind her.

"Looking for mites," she said. "They're hard to see unless there's an infestation, but I've been checking about once a week. We've had such dry weather that the conditions are ripe for them."

"Katniss Everdeen, fighting mites, protecting innocent flowers."

"Yeah, yeah. You can laugh."

"I will laugh," he said easily and smiling at her. "You were a good sport last night. Thanks. I have no other recognizable talents."

"I doubt that," she said. "But no problem. Though I may understand now why Clove was too sick to go camping with you."

He laughed at that and then said, "I am really glad we've become friends."

Katniss stiffened just a bit and looked at him. She studied his face, looking for signs of…of…She didn't know what. Subterfuge? Sarcasm? But all she found was genuine warmth, a warmth she felt spread through her. The same warmth she had felt last night securely in his arms. She smiled back at him. "Yeah," she said. "Me, too."

* * *

**A/N **Grateful, grateful thanks to the glorious ZenLeigh (BohemianRider) - best beta in the business.


	5. Chapter 5: Friends

When Katniss returned to her cabin after the hike, she felt good. Really good. _Strange_, she thought to herself. Just the knowledge that Peeta was her friend had brought her such relief. She liked spending time with him. He made her laugh, and she liked talking to him, but until today, she hadn't been able to shake the worry in the back of her mind that he wanted, maybe expected, more. But he had said so himself. He wanted to be her friend, and the anxiety she had felt was gone.

Before dinner Katniss left her cabin to call Prim for their twice-weekly phone date. Except for in the main office, there was only one phone on the entire Ridgecrest campus – a pay phone located underneath the dining hall in the room called "Below Stairs." There was a concession stand and a ping pong table there along with a giant stone fire place.

Katniss made her way through the clumps of campers to the pay phone. She pulled her phone card out of her pocket, spent a few minutes punching in all the numbers, and then heard the phone ringing.

"Hello?"

"Hey little duck," Katniss said smiling. "How are you?"

"Katniss! Hey! I'm good. Drowning in summer reading."

"APs?"

"Yeah. They're killing me."

Katniss swallowed. "How's mom?"

"Fine. She's been working a lot in the garden this summer. We've got so many tomatoes, she's gonna have to start selling them." Katniss didn't really have anything to say to this. After a moment of silence, Prim continued. "How are you? I can't wait for you to come home next week!"

"I know. Me too."

"Any update on Tech?"

"No news. I'll have to go down to Atlanta at some point next week. I think I'm going to rent a room in Johanna's house, so I need to check it out and probably put down a deposit. But otherwise, I have no plans."

"What's happened to you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You asked about mom, you're not stressing about Tech, and your voice sounds lighter. You don't sound like you're scowling. Are you scowling?"

"Well I am now."

"You're making a joke? Tell me now. What's happened? Did you meet someone?"

"No!"

"Katniss!"

Katniss looked around her. The room was full of kids in it killing time until dinner but no adults. "I, uh, made a new friend."

"A friend? What's his name?"

Katniss stretched the cord of the phone as far into the corner as she could go and tried to keep her voice down. "Do you remember Peeta Mellark?"

"As in Mellark's Bakery where Sae used to work?"

"Do you remember when they lived in Ellijay?"

"No. Don't think so."

"He's a counselor here. But we're just friends, Prim, nothing more."

"Were y'all friends before? I mean when they lived here?"

"No. Well kinda. He helped me out once right before they moved away, but I didn't really know him." She could see kids leaving Below Stairs. She checked her watch.

"I need to go. It's time for dinner."

"Katniss, listen to me. If he's your friend, you've gotta give him a chance. Don't get stuck in your head about this."

"Prim, we're just friends. Nothing to worry about."

"I love you, Kat."

"You, too, little duck. See you next week."

Katniss made her way into the dining hall and decided to track down Madge. She filled her tray and scanned the room until she found her group near the back.

"Hey, Madge. Mind if I sit with y'all tonight?"

"Of course not," Madge replied, sliding down the bench to make room for her.

"The lovely Katniss," said a voice low in her ear. "I never see you." Two arms encircled her, squeezing, as she felt a body pressed up close behind her.

She put her tray down before turning and breaking Finnick's embrace. "Hey, Finn. You do know that one of these days, I'm going to haul off and hit you, right?"

"Looking forward to it," he said, moving to sit across from her. "So how was the big birthday weekend? Madge says y'all got silly."

"It was good," she said.

"When's Jo coming back?"

"I don't know. I'm going to see her over the break next week."

"Break!" Finnick said. "It's only been three weeks, but I can hardly wait! We just have to get through mini-camp next week." He looked at the boy sitting next to him. "Yeah, that's right. You heard me. I'm ready for a break from you adolescents!"

Madge and Katniss laughed, but Finnick's attention had narrowed on the boy – who was sitting close to the girl next to him. They had been whispering to themselves. "You know Matt," Finnick said to the boy, "you'll be able to eat much more efficiently with both hands on the table."

The girl blushed a deep crimson as Matt muttered, "We were just holding hands."

"Ah, young love," said Finnick sarcastically.

"Has he been like this all week?" Katniss asked Madge.

"Worse. I think someone had a bad date last weekend and is taking it out on everyone else. But especially Matt and Jennifer here."

Katniss leaned across the table to the girl. "Just ignore him. We all do."

"Wounded. I am absolutely wounded," Finnick said, but Katniss could see that his eyes were guarded, and she wondered if he wasn't too far from the truth.

The campers finished eating and wandered outside to enjoy the nightly free time as the adults in the room clustered together in groups in the dining hall. Finnick got up to socialize, leaving Madge and Katniss alone.

"So you're looking good. Relaxed. Your forehead isn't scrunchy like it always is."

Katniss put her hand to her face self consciously.

"How are things with Peeta?"

"Good. Really good, actually. We decided to be friends."

"Wait, what? Why is that good?"

"Because," Katniss sighed. "It just makes me feel so much better. I don't have to worry. No what ifs or weird thoughts. I can just…like you said. Relax." She shrugged.

"Y'all are looking very serious."

Katniss and Madge both looked up to see Peeta in front of them. "Hey," Katniss said, feeling startled and worried that somehow he might know that she was just talking about him. She felt her forehead wrinkle and silently cursed Madge. "How's Clove feeling?" she asked, grasping for something to say.

"She's better. I think it was just a 24 hour thing. Hey Madge, are you in or out of the cabin tonight?"

"Out! You?"

"Yeah, me too. So I'll see you. Katniss, you should come hang out tonight."

"We'll see," she said.

"So mysterious. Well, if you can't find something better to do…" he said, walking away. She watched him all the way out the door.

Katniss felt Madge's hand on her arm, pulling Katniss to face her. "Katniss, listen to me. I know there's something there for you. You can't just ignore it."

"But you just said yourself! I'm looking good right now! Relaxed, remember? That's healthy, right?"

"Yeah, but there are times in life that you just can't stay in the comfort zone, and I think this is one of them for you."

Katniss looked away. "I don't want to be scared," she said quietly.

"It's only scary at first," Madge said. "And then it's wonderful."

* * *

Katniss found herself on the big, stone porch later that night in a cut-throat game of Hearts with Madge, Peeta, and Finnick. She had managed to avoid the queen of spades for the entire game, but in the last round, she found it in her hand with no opportunity yet to pass it off.

She was surprised by how serious the other three were about this game. They'd chatted between hands, but once the cards were dealt, they focused and played to win. For the first time, Katniss wondered why in four years she had never wandered onto the porch at night. She'd been missing out.

Finnick had taken the previous trick, and it was his turn to lead. He sat staring at the two cards left in his hand. "Anyone know if the ace of hearts is out yet?"

"No talking around the table," growled Peeta.

"Hmmm." Finnick pulled one of the cards and put it down deliberately on the table - the king of hearts. This was all Katniss needed. She watched Madge play the ten of hearts and Peeta throw away a club. With a flourish, she put down the queen of spades.

"The bitch? You're giving ME the bitch? Katniss, after all we've been through?" Finnick gave his best hurt puppy look.

"You know you have no effect on me whatsoever. Don't even try."

"Argh," Finnick grumbled, gathering up the trick and playing his final card, the ace of spades.

"See," Katniss said. "You would have gotten it anyway."

"I'm done with y'all," Finnick said, gathering up the cards and giving one last shuffle. "I'm taking my cards and going home!" He stood up in mock anger.

"Finnick, don't go," Madge said. "Tell us what's wrong with you."

Finnick just gave his head a small shake. "Nothing. I'm fine. See y'all tomorrow when we'll get rid of another fine week full of campers."

"G'night," Madge called as he walked off the porch. "I'm done, too. Anyone around this weekend?"

"Yeah, I am," Peeta said.

"I am, but Gale's coming into town," Katniss said.

"Gale?" Madge said, her face brightening.

"Yes," Katniss said, laughing. "We'll come find you."

Madge smiled her sweetest smile. "Katniss, you're too good to me. 'Night," she said, heading off towards the row of girls' cabins.

"Who is Gale?" Peeta asked, looking off the porch into the darkness.

"An old friend," she replied. "A neighbor, actually. He just graduated from West Point."

They sat in silence for a moment before Katniss said, "Well, I guess I should head home, too." She stood up.

"Yep," Peeta said, following her down the porch steps.

"I'm glad you came out tonight," he said as they walked. "Why haven't you come out before?"

"I don't know," she said. "There's always been a bit of a separation between the counselors and the Grubs. We've always just kept to ourselves."

"Did Johanna keep to herself?"

Katniss laughed. "Johanna doesn't keep anything to herself. But she's different. Still, it seems silly now. I don't know. It always just seemed easier to hang on my own."

"Do you always do what's easiest?"

She was quiet. She didn't know how to answer him. Her life had been so hard in some ways that she was always looking to make things easier. But this question seemed different, like he was asking her about more than just making ends meet.

"I'm sorry," he said, eventually. "I shouldn't have said that." They continued walking in silence until it was time for her to cross the bridge that would take her up towards her cabin.

"Don't apologize," she said, turning towards him. "Yes, I think I do tend to look for the easiest path. After my father died, my whole life became figuring out how to make things easier for my sister – and for me, too. It's hard to explain, and hard for someone else to understand. I've just always tried to protect us in every way I could."

She met his eyes levelly as he processed what she had said. And then, finally, he said, "I'm sorry you've had to shoulder that responsibility. It wasn't fair."

"I wouldn't change anything," she said severely. She could feel her face tighten.

"I know you wouldn't. And I know Prim must love you just as fiercely as you love her. I just wish…things weren't always so hard for you. It seems like you had to grow up too fast. That's all."

She could feel her eyes filling, and she looked up and away from him, willing her tears not to fall. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see him move towards her, and his arms came around her. She felt his warmth, the comfort of his body, so solid against her. Her hands moved to his back as she lightly rested her head on his chest.

"You know I'm your friend. I'm always here to help you. With whatever."

She didn't want to move. The comfort she felt was so physical, it pulled at her to stay right there, but her head was taking over. The voice was telling her to be wary, not trust this feeling that was slowly consuming her body. She let out a ragged breath and stepped away from him. "Thank you," she said, straining to make eye contact. "I need to go."

"Yeah. I'll see you?"

"Yeah."

* * *

Katniss spent early Saturday morning straightening her cabin and getting ready for Gale. She couldn't believe how quickly the summer was passing. They would have mini-camp this week, a short, two-night experience for elementary school kids, and then she'd have five days off. When they returned from the break, they'd have only two weeks left. She couldn't help but wonder what the end of camp would bring. So many parts of her life were up in the air at the moment. She couldn't visualize what would come next, but she felt surprisingly at peace about it all.

The thought that nagged her most was about Peeta. She wondered if she would see him once she moved to Atlanta. The feel of him flashed in her mind, and she felt her body flood with warmth. When he had hugged her the other night, without thinking, her hands had run up his back. She could still feel the movement of his muscles under her hands as he wrapped his arms around her. She blushed as she caught herself in this moment. Surely she would see him. They were friends.

She was brought out of her thoughts by the knock on her door. "Gale!" she said, hurrying to the door and opening it for him.

"Catnip," he said, enveloping her in a hug. She hugged him tightly.

"Hey graduate," she said. He released her, and she looked him over. His hair was closely cropped. He was in loose pants and a t-shirt, but she could see the lean, strong muscles of his body. "It's strange to see you out of uniform." She stepped out of the doorway so that he could come in. "I wish I could have come to your graduation. Hazelle said she's never been so proud."

He smiled at her and put down his pack. "It was something. It's hard to believe it's over." He sat down on the futon and put his head back. "I start Officer Leadership Training next week at Fort Benning. I'd like to think I could see you more often now, but I kinda doubt we're going to have any free time. It's only four weeks, and then hopefully I'll be off to Arizona."

"What's in Arizona?" she asked, sitting down and pulling her legs up under herself as she turned to face him.

"Fort Huachuca. Since I'm specializing in Military Intelligence, the second part of my Leadership Training will be there." He raised his eyebrows. "And from there, who knows?"

"I can't even fathom the kinds of things you'll be doing."

He nodded. "How's the summer treating you?"

"Good. Really good. Seems like it's flying by. I'm going to be sad to leave this place."

"Any news on Tech?" She shook her head. "So what's the plan?"

She told him her plans as tentative as they were and shrugged. "We'll see what happens."

He nodded at her, his eyes lingering on her face. "You look good, Catnip. You don't seem worried."

"I guess there's nothing I can do at this point."

"That's a very un-Everdeen way of looking at things. But good! I'm not complaining." He smiled at her. "You know, when I was home, I went by your house. Your mom and Prim seem to be doing well."

"You mean my mother was actually home? Shocking."

"Catnip, that's not fair. You know it's not like that anymore."

"Really convenient of her to hang around now that we are grown and don't need really her."

"Prim needs her, Kat. And you do, too."

"No I don't, Gale," she interrupted. "I needed her when I was twelve, but she chose to leave us alone. So I had to figure out life without her." Her eyebrows furrowed and she looked away from him. "I don't want to talk about this."

"We don't have to talk about it," he said, putting his arm around her. "But you have to know that she didn't just make a _choice_. You know it wasn't that simple, and she's trying now. You should give her another chance. And that's all I'll say about it." He paused. "So what's on tap for today?"

"Hiking. I haven't been on the yellow trail all summer, and I'd really like to spend some time on it. I've packed us a lunch."

"Let's get to it," Gale said, standing.

There was a short rap on the door. "Katniss?" Haymitch was standing outside the screen door. "Mind if I come in?"

"Hey, Haymitch. Of course, come on in. You remember my friend Gale?"

"Hey," Haymitch said, offering his hand to Gale. "Yeah, I think we might've met once or twice over the years. Good to see you." He turned to Katniss. "Listen, sweetheart, I'm glad to find you. Where are you going to be later this afternoon?"

"We were going hiking. Why?"

"A couple of members of the Ridgecrest Board of Trustees are making their annual visit to camp this weekend. I'd like them to meet you."

"Why?"

"Well, I was talking to Corin Snow about your position. You remember him? He's Chairman of the Board. You know we haven't found anyone to take over your internship and thus your scholarship. I've talked to them about extending your scholarship to cover your last years of school. He was interested. He was especially interested when I told him about your position at Fernbank. I think he's wondering if there can be any kind of collaboration between Fernbank and camp, and he's thinking you might be the one to spearhead that."

He let her take in this information. "Anyway, they'll be here soon. They'll tour camp until lunch, but I was hoping to introduce you to them this afternoon and maybe let them ask you some questions."

"Haymitch, I don't know what to say. Of course I'll talk to them." She moved to him and hugged him. "Thank you. You've been looking out for me for years. I don't know what I'd do without you."

He grimaced. "Well, don't get your hopes up yet, sweetheart. Nothing's settled."

She turned to Gale. "I guess this changes our plans."

"Not a problem," he said. "I can hang. Whatever."

"You should track down Madge."

He lifted his eyebrows. "I might just do that."

* * *

Haymitch's office was in the bottom floor of an old, Victorian house near the Ridgecrest entrance. Gale walked with Katniss across camp. They spoke little. She had changed into black pants and a cotton sweater. Her feet were crammed into black flats for the first time all summer, and they felt cramped and sweaty as she walked. She had pulled her hair back from her face with a simple barrette, and her hair was sticky on her neck. She felt weird and not herself. She took a deep breath as they approached the house.

Gale stopped walking and turned to her. "You got this, Kat. You are an impressive individual. Be yourself in there, and they will see you are worth their consideration."

"I've never been good at talking to strangers."

"But that's something you'll have to do over and over again. It's a life skill. And you're underestimating yourself. Let them see your passion for this place. They're going to want to keep you in whatever capacity they can." He leaned down and kissed her cheek. "You're going to be great."

"We'll see," she said as she turned from him and walked up the steps to the porch. "I'll find you when it's over."

Katniss opened the front door and found Haymitch waiting for her in the foyer. "Hey," she said.

"You ready for this, sweetheart?"

"I guess."

"They're nice enough men, but you need to show them why they need to invest in you. You need to make an impression. Do you think you can do that?"

"I'll do my best."

"All you can do. They're already in my office. Come on this way."

Katniss followed him in and the two men sitting there both stood at her arrival. "Katniss," Haymitch said. "You've met our Chairman, Corin Snow, before, but I'm not sure you've had the chance to meet Jackson Boggs, who also sits on the Board."

"Good to see you again, Mr. Snow," Katniss said. She shook his hand and then moved on to Boggs. "Nice to meet you."

"Have a seat, my dear," he said. Katniss felt her back straighten at the condescending tone he used with her. She sat in the empty chair.

"So Katniss," Boggs began, "tell us about yourself."

"Well, I'm from Ellijay. I've lived in this area all of my life. I started working as a Grub here at Ridgecrest the summer I turned sixteen. And then I moved here when I earned the Ridgecrest Scholarship. I've lived here for the last two years as I attended Young Harris." She took a deep breath, trying to organize her thoughts. "And now, it's almost time for me to leave. This place has been such a big part of my life for four years. It's hard to imagine my life anywhere else."

"But your life is about to change," Snow interrupted. "You are leaving us for Atlanta? Tell us about your plans there."

"I've gotten an internship at the Fernbank Science Center." She looked at them to see if there was any recognition, but both men's faces remained passive, so she continued. "Fernbank is actually a part of the DeKalb County school system. It has a small museum, a planetarium, several labs, and large outdoor spaces. It provides professional development for DeKalb County teachers as well as extracurricular courses for students, but everything they do centers around hands-on learning. I'll just be an intern there, so I imagine I'll be doing whatever they tell me to do, but I believe I'll be working on developing curriculum and assisting in the classroom and in the field."

"And do you want to be a teacher?" Boggs asked.

"I don't know," Katniss said. "I know that I'm better when I'm working with my hands, so wherever I end up, I'll need to be active. I can't imagine spending my days at a desk – or even in a laboratory."

"I see." Snow was looking at her closely. "What kind of benefit do you think Ridgecrest could gain from your work with Fernbank?"

Katniss wasn't sure how to answer this question. She didn't know enough about her internship and what she'd be doing, what she could offer Fernbank in the first place, to adequately answer this question. But she plunged in anyway.

"Fernbank is on the cutting edge of the environmental movement. Environmental sustainability will have to be part of the conversation as Ridgecrest faces the future. There are many practices around here that could be, really should be, updated. We don't compost. We recycle some but not all that we could. A lot of the trails that lie within our borders need substantial maintenance – more than just one person can do by hand. Some of the cabins are getting beyond the point of repair and will need rebuilding it the next few years. How we go about updating the camp should be approached through the perspective of sustainability."

"That's going to cost a lot of money," Snow said.

"Yes, but hopefully any investment we make now to fix things in the right way will only pay off down the road." She looked at them but couldn't read their faces. "Any connection the camp could have with Fernbank could only aid us to that end. It could expose us to the newest trends in everything from ecology to conservation. Furthermore, the work I want to do at Georgia Tech supplements this vision in every way."

The room was silent as she finished. She looked down and then back up at them. Had she overstepped? She wasn't sure. Gale had told her to show her passion, and she had, but perhaps it was more than they wanted. More than they were ready to hear.

"You have many ideas, my dear." His tone told her he was not impressed.

"I care a lot about this camp," she said. "I want it to be here for generations to come, so that it can have the profound and lasting influence on others that it has had on me."

"Well, Katniss," said Boggs, standing up and offering her his hand again. "Thank you for taking the time to meet with us."

Katniss stood and shook hands all around. "Thank you, sir."

"I'll walk you out," Haymitch said, opening his office door for her.

Katniss walked back into the foyer and out the front door. She stopped and waited for Haymitch on the porch, turning to him as he joined her. "I screwed that up so much. I don't know what I was thinking."

"No, no. Don't worry. I mean, I'm not sure they were ready to hear all of what you just said, but all of it is also true. You care about this place, and they saw that. That's important."

She took a deep breath. He put his hands on her shoulders and said, "Nothing to do now but wait and see."

"Yeah. Thanks, Haymitch. For everything." She started down the steps. "I'll see you later."

Walking back through camp, she could hear Madge's laugh and followed it to the grassy lawn outside of the dining hall. Madge, Gale, Peeta, and Finnick were playing Frisbee, and she walked up in time to see Finnick grab Madge from behind in order to keep her from making a catch.

"I didn't realize this was a full-contact sport," Gale huffed, looking down at the tangle of bodies on the grass.

Peeta saw Katniss first as she approached them and called to her. Madge and Finnick stood up and Gale walked towards her meeting her half-way across the field. "Hey," he said. "How was it?"

"I don't know. I don't think it went well," she said as they joined the others. "It was weird. Mr. Snow is so condescending. He clearly just wants whatever he can get out of Fernbank. I'm not sure he realized before now their emphasis on environmentalism. Anyway, I ended up going off on all the changes the camp needs to make. Don't know what I was thinking. It probably just sounded like a rant, like I was just criticizing this place. I don't know. I don't think it went well."

Gale put his arm around her as Madge said, "I'm sure it's not as bad as you think."

"What you need is a drink," Finnick said.

"You know, Finnick," Katniss said. "I think you might be right."

* * *

After a night of cheap pizza and cheaper beer, Katniss was feeling better. It was nice to just spend time with the people she trusted – all in the same place at the same time. They had piled into Peeta's Suburban, and he was the only one taking it easy with the beer. Gale was clearly using his time off to cut loose, and Madge had a huge smile on her face each time she gazed at him. Even Finnick seemed to have broken free of whatever had bothered him lately.

They had settled the tab and Katniss had just poured the last of the pitcher into her own glass when Finnick stood up. "Folks," he said, "I think the time has come. Tonight is the night for our annual swim in the falls."

Peeta looked around. "I didn't think we were supposed to swim in the falls."

"The campers are not allowed to," Finnick said, "but no one ever said anything about the counselors. It's safe. The hardest part is withstanding the freezing water.

Katniss gulped the remainder of her glass and stood up. "I'm in," she said.

"Katniss! Breaking out!" laughed Madge.

"What have I got to lose?" she said, though she could feel herself swaying a little.

Peeta put his hand on her back to steady her. "I'm not sure this is the best idea," she heard him murmur to Finnick as they made their way out.

"Don't worry," Finnick said. "The water will sober everyone up."

* * *

The thunderous Gap Creek Falls were accessed most easily by following the creek from the edge of the boys' row of cabins. Katniss was aware of Peeta close beside her as they walked along the edge of the creek, avoiding the most slippery places. She could tell her legs were sluggish, and she was glad to have his arm to grab occasionally as she made her way over rocks.

When they were forced into the stream by the rocks on the bank, Madge squealed at the cold water. "I'm rethinking this idea already," she said.

Katniss had some force pushing her on, and soon she had reached the pool at the bottom of the falls. In her inebriated haze, she surged forward as the water grew deeper and the pool widened. The roar of the falls drowned out the voices around her. Once in waist-deep water, she plunged in and ducked under the surface. The icy water made her hair stand out from every pore, and her breath seemed to freeze inside her lungs.

She felt a hand on her arm pulling her up, and there was Peeta, worry in his eyes, holding her up by the elbows. "Careful!" he yelled over the thunder of the water. His hair was wet and tossed back from his face, and his eyes were bright in the darkness.

She found her feet, standing more steadily now, and grabbed his hand as she led him towards the edge of the pool, getting closer to the falls. Along the side, the water coming down wasn't as strong. She turned back to Peeta and shouted, "Follow me!" He held back, but she smiled up at him and motioned for him to come on. Holding tightly to his hand and pulling him along with her, she ducked under the curtain of water. It crashed on her head for only a moment before she was on the other side. She could feel Peeta's reluctance, but she pulled him through, and then he was beside her.

He looked around wide-eyed. "Oh, wow!" It was a small cavern beneath the falls with a rock ledge perfect for sitting. "How did you know this was here?"

"Johanna showed me my first year as a Grub," she said. She sat down on the ledge and scooted over to make room for him. The wall of water in front of them was dark and alive though the noise was more muted in here.

"It must be incredible in here during the day when you can see daylight though the water," he said. He put his hand out and let the water crash on his fingers.

"Yeah. I imagine. I've only ever been here at night." She shivered and leaned against him. She kept thinking about the warmth that had pulsed through her in his arms the other night. She wanted that feeling again. She turned to him, moving closer and sneaking her arm around his waist. He put his arm around her lightly, and her head was heavy against his chest, but now that she was sitting still, she could feel herself starting to spin. She closed her eyes tightly and tried to slow the motion. After a moment, she leaned away from him and said, "I need to stand up."

"Are you OK?"

"Spinning."

Her teeth had begun to chatter, and she worked to clench her jaw, but he looked down at her with concern. "I think we need to get you dry and warm."

She allowed him to lead her back to the entrance of the cavern. He held her hand tightly and ducked back under the falls, pulling her through after him and catching her on the other side.

She looked around at the empty pool. "Where did everyone go?" she asked.

"Uh, I saw Gale and Madge head off together," he said. "I think she has the cabin to herself this weekend, and…" He lifted his eyebrows, not finishing his sentence. "Don't know about Finnick."

He led the way back down the creek until they reached the bank where they could crawl up. Her shoes squished with every step, and her clothes felt heavy. He held her arm as they walked, and when they reached the bridge he turned and said, "I don't really want to leave you alone tonight. You've had a lot to drink."

Her smile felt big on her face. "I'm fine." She was fixated on his hair and reached out to brush it away from his forehead.

His face was guarded, and she wasn't sure why. "Probably. Still, I'll feel better if you're not alone. I don't mind crashing on your couch. Can you wait just a minute while I throw on some dry clothes?"

Peeta was in and out of his cabin in just a few minutes, and they continued up the path in silence. Katniss was suddenly exhausted. She didn't like the space that had somehow grown between them. She wasn't sure what had happened to change the easy way he usually looked at her.

When they reached her cabin, she walked in and held the door for him. He stepped in awkwardly and stayed by the door. She turned. "Can I get you something? Some tea?"

"Katniss, you're shivering. You need to get changed and then to bed."

She nodded and disappeared into the bedroom. She peeled the wet clothes from her body and put on the long t-shirt she slept in before heading into her bathroom. She put her hands on the sink to steady herself. She was spinning again. As she finished brushing her teeth, she accidentally knocked the soap dish off the sink and onto the tile floor with a crash.

"Katniss? You OK?"

"Fine, fine," she called out. "Just knocked something over." She emerged from the bathroom. He had found the extra blanket on the back of the chair and had already laid out the futon. When he saw her, his eyes dropped from her face, taking in the t-shirt and her bare legs beneath as she walked towards him. She felt her blood thrumming through her body. She stared up at him, and his eyes returned to her face. He blushed slightly. She held his eyes and just wanted to stay there, held aloft in deep blue. Why had she had such trouble looking him in the eye before, she briefly wondered. She felt her breath catch in her chest as she reached up and lightly cupped his cheek with her hand, running her thumb along the planes of his face. He closed his eyes and seemed to stop breathing.

Katniss had never wanted a kiss before in her life like she did right then. He was here and so handsome and she couldn't remember why she had tried to keep him away.

She brought her other hand up to his face, and he opened his eyes. She pulled him down to her and his lips met hers. Her body trembled as his arms wrapped tightly around her waist. She could feel herself rising up to him, every inch of her body reaching for him. She parted her lips slightly.

Suddenly he broke the kiss and pulled back. "We shouldn't do this. We _can't_ do this." His voice was slightly hoarse, and he seemed out of breath. Katniss opened her eyes to find him in distress.

She tried to move closer to him but he held her firmly away. "What's the matter?" She knew her face was red, and suddenly she felt panic creeping in.

He wasn't looking at her. "I... can't do this Katniss. Not like this. You've been drinking too much. I know you. If you even remember this in the morning, you'll be mortified." He pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed his eyes. "This can't happen. Not like this."

Katniss knew her face had frozen into a scowl. When he looked at her again, his face was stricken to see it. "No," he whispered. "Please. Don't look like that." He sat down on the futon, pulling her down beside him. He ran his hands down her arms. "Katniss, don't you see? If there's something between us, we have to be very careful with it. We can't do this the wrong way."

But Katniss had stiffened and her head was talking louder than his whispers could penetrate. She was embarrassed and confused and just wanted to escape.

"I think I'll go to bed," she said, rising. "You don't have to stay. I'm fine."

He held on to her hand a moment more. "I am staying. I'll be here if you need anything."

"I won't."

* * *

Katniss felt like someone had bolted her head to the bed when she woke the next morning. It was heavy and throbbing. Her mouth felt both dry and sticky, and if she hadn't had to pee, she would never have gotten up.

Somewhere between pulling her head off the pillow and making her way to the bathroom, the memory of the night before flashed before her eyes. _Oh god._ She crept as quietly as possible and locked the bathroom door. Was he still out there? _Bound to be_. She rested her head on the cool porcelain of the bathroom sink and wished she could disappear down the drain. What had she been thinking? Getting so drunk and throwing herself at him. _Ridiculous_. But worse was his rejection. It was clear to her that she had no ability when it came to reading people because she had been so sure that he liked her. _Wrong_. And now she was going to have to go out there and face him?

Perhaps she could just sneak back to bed.

When she finished, she opened the bathroom door with every intention of returning to bed, but he had heard her and was calling her name softly from the other room. She pulled on some shorts before walking warily into the den.

"Hey," he said when he saw her. He had made coffee and was reading one of her books in her recliner. "How are you feeling?"

"I've been better. I just took some Tylenol." She looked at him and didn't know what to say. _Leave_, she thought. _Just go_.

"Can I get you some coffee?" She looked away and tried not to gag. She shook her head. "Do you, uh, do you have any memory of last night?"

_No_, she wanted to say. _No no no_. She really wanted to lie, but she knew from the extreme heat she felt flushing her cheeks that her face had given her away. She didn't answer him.

"Come sit down," he said gently. She stayed where she was, feeling idiotic and frozen in place. "Katniss," he said. "Please?"

She made her way over to the futon and carefully sat down. She couldn't look at him – didn't want to see the pity she knew would be in his eyes.

He moved to sit next to her. She could feel him staring at her but she couldn't bear to look at him.

"You kissed me last night." _Oh god. This is excruciating. _ "Do you understand why I stopped it? I mean, you could barely stand up. I didn't want to take advantage of you."

Katniss wasn't really listening. The voice in her head was screaming. She really needed him to leave.

"Katniss, look at me."

She couldn't. She couldn't. She barely turned her head and slid her eyes in his direction.

"Katniss, don't be embarrassed." She huffed. "No, really. Listen, it's OK. You're being silly. This kind of thing happens all the time.

_No it doesn't. Not to me. Please just leave._

"Listen, I know we've got the break coming up. But maybe once we get back to camp, we can go out some time? I mean, just the two of us?"

Katniss didn't think that was a good idea at all. If she could just get him out the door, she didn't really want to see him ever again. But she saw her way to get him out.

"Yeah, maybe," she said quietly.

He sighed. "I guess I'll take that." He was still looking at her. "Can I make you some breakfast?"

"Ugh," she moaned. She leaned back on the couch and curled up away from him.

"OK, OK. I'm gonna get going. Can I get you anything before I leave?"

"I'm fine."

He stood up. "I'll see you later? Maybe at lunch?"

She made what she hoped sounded like affirmative noises. He sighed and made his way to the door. When he reached the door, she heard him say, "Bye, Katniss."

He walked out the door being careful to keep the screen door from slamming behind him.

* * *

**A/N** Thanks to everyone who has reviewed or alerted or favorited! I'm so happy that people seem to be enjoying this story.

So many thanks to the lovely bohemian, ZenLeigh for her beta skills and overwhelming support. I don't think she could hold my hand more securely if she were sitting right here with me.


	6. Chapter 6: Decatur

Chapter 5 - Decatur

Peeta had not slept that night. Lying on her futon and staring at the ceiling, he berated himself for what had just happened – what he had allowed to happen. He had been so good, so patient with her. He had treated the situation exactly right. He had continually given her space, and each time she had rewarded him by taking a small step towards him.

He had handled it all just right until that kiss. The feel of her hands on his face, her body rising to his. He relived that moment in his head. His lips on hers. _It was wrong._ He had clutched her in such a possessive way. He knew better but he was so surprised and the feel of her body against his had erased rational thought for just a moment. A dangerous moment. _Wrong. Wrong way to do it._

Restless through the night, he hadn't even been able to enjoy the memory. When he'd finally gotten up, he'd fixed coffee and waited for her to wake. The longer she'd slept, the more anxious he became. The look on her face when he had stopped her haunted him. She was too drunk to understand, so he had to make her understand.

But she hadn't understood, clearly. He left her cabin on the brink of despondency, realizing that all he had worked for had unraveled in one drunken night.

* * *

Peeta wandered up to the dining hall for lunch. It was a small crowd in there as it usually was on Sundays since the new group of campers had not yet arrived. He doubted Katniss would make it in – she had looked pretty rough, and he figured she was nursing a massive hangover. He didn't really want to talk to anyone. He set his tray down at an empty table.

He had almost finished his lunch when he realized someone was talking to him.

"Don't leave yet, man. Wait on me!" Finnick was making his way to the line. Peeta sighed. He really didn't feel up for Finnick, but when he returned to the table with his lunch, Peeta found him strangely subdued.

"You look about as good as I feel," Finnick said to him.

"Yeah. Wasn't the best night."

Finnick looked like he was about to ask but thought better of it. "Sorry man."

"So what's up with you? Why are you out of sorts?" And as Peeta said the words, he realized just how miserable Finnick looked. The gleam in his eyes was gone leaving instead worry and doubt. "What happened?"

"Uhhhh," Finnick groaned. He swallowed. "I don't want to talk about it." He pushed some green beans around his plate while Peeta waited.

Finally, Finnick put down his fork and covered his eyes with the heels of his palms. "I met a girl," he said.

"And that's bad?"

"The Girl. I think I met The Girl. But I didn't realize it, and I treated her like any other girl. And I think," he took a deep breath, exhaling his next words, "I think now it's too late."

"It can't be too late. There's always something you can do, right?" The words felt false on his tongue as Peeta said them. He knew what it felt like to be facing a dead end.

"I don't know, man. I really don't." He stood suddenly and picked up his tray. "I'm not hungry. I'll see you."

Peeta watched him go before dropping off his own tray and heading back to his cabin.

* * *

Peeta did his best to revive his energy and enthusiasm for his campers. He tried to remind himself that this was the reason he was here in the first place. After the afternoon round of games, his group made their way to the dining hall porch to wait for dinner. As he was standing and trying to account for all of his campers, he felt two arms embrace him from behind.

"How are you?" Madge asked quietly in his ear.

He dropped his head, and she moved around to face him. "I heard what happened."

He let out a long breath. "I've been better. How is she?"

"A mess."

"I keep trying to figure out what I should have done, what I could have done to have kept all of this from happening."

"Oh Peeta, this isn't your fault."

"I know. I know I did the right thing. I'm just pissed about the whole thing, really." And then Peeta realized he _was_pissed. He had done everything right, and she had ruined it. He sighed in frustration.

"Give her time, Peeta."

"I don't think there's anything else I can do."

"No. There's not."

* * *

He was in bed reading with a flashlight when he heard the light tap at his door. He looked over at Dalton, sure it was Glimmer for him, but Dalton was unmoving, already asleep. He got up and went to the door but stopped short when he saw Katniss standing in the darkness. He stared at her without saying anything.

"Hey," she said.

Her voice was higher than usual and she cleared her throat. She was nervous. _Good_.

"Hey."

"Can we talk? A minute? I know you're not supposed to be out of your cabin this late, but . . . "

He was in pajama pants and a white t-shirt, but it was late and no one was around. He opened the door quietly and walked down the path. When he got to the bridge, he leaned back against the railing and waited for her to start.

She fidgeted with the hem of her shirt for a moment before looking up at him. She looked so desperate, so fragile, and all he wanted to do was gather her to him and tell her everything was OK. But he steeled himself, determined that she would lead this conversation. He had tried already to make amends. It was her turn.

"Um, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. For everything. The drunkenness. Uh, throwing myself at you. And then this morning." She wasn't looking at him. "I didn't handle any of it very well."

Well there was an understatement.

He let out a breath of frustration. "Katniss, what do you want from me?"

She took a deep breath. He was pretty sure she was looking just over his shoulder, not at him. "Friendship," she said with what seemed like too much force. "I want your friendship."

He had to figure out what he wanted from her. Was she important enough to him to continue down this path? To take the necessary steps backward so that he might eventually take another step forward?

Ultimately, he didn't really have to ask himself that question.

He sighed. "You have it."

He was running to stand still.

* * *

Mini-camp seemed to be over before it had even begun. Because the kids were so much younger, they had virtually no free time, so Peeta's days were completely full. He had hoped Katniss might make an effort to see him, but she didn't.

On Tuesday afternoon as his last camper left with his parents, Peeta wrestled with what to do. He really wanted to see her again before he left for home, but he wasn't going to go looking for her.

He packed slowly, piling all of his laundry into a large duffle bag to take home and wash. He grabbed a few books and a handful of CDs. By the time he was ready to go, he decided the best thing to do was just go. Leave her alone. Give her space. But the idea filled him with a sense of dread. He had to keep telling himself that it would be fine. He would see her again. Trust the process. Leave her alone and let her come to him.

The tenuous plan seemed destined to fail.

He threw his stuff into the back seat of the Suburban and, looking around the parking lot, got into his car. Her car was still there. He took a deep breath and with resolve he didn't really feel turned his car down the long drive leading out to the highway.

* * *

"It's really not that hard, Dell. But you have to let the cheese come to room temperature before you start incorporating it into the dough. Otherwise, it separates."

"I did, Peeta, but they still flopped. I just don't have the magic touch. But you've always been good with your hands, if you know what I mean," she smirked.

Peeta smiled, looking up from the tray of cookies he was glazing. Delly was his next-door-neighbor, and they had been friends since his parents had moved back to Atlanta in the seventh grade. She had been his first girlfriend, his first kiss . . . well, his first of several things. But they had only dated briefly during tenth grade.

Their couplings had been less about chemistry and more about curiosity.

Peeta had always been able to remain friends with ex-girlfriends, and he credited Delly with teaching him how to do it.

They didn't see each other as much anymore since she had gone to UNC, but their friendship had remained strong nonetheless. In fact, it had been her idea to work at the bakery that summer while he was away. "I need a job," she had said, "and your parents will need some extra help."

Peeta was grateful. It had at least solved the problem of the bakery being short-handed while he was gone, and his parents had always liked Delly. He hadn't been surprised at how efficiently she was running things in the front of the store – Delly had always had a practicality in everything she did – but he hadn't expected her to have taken such an interest in the baking side of the business. His father had been teaching her some of the recipes, and the batch of maple cookies he was working on right now were hers. They were delicious.

He heard one of the timers going off in the kitchen and turned towards the door, but Delly stopped him. "I'll get them," she said. "You're busy." She disappeared through the swinging door.

Peeta was glad to be back in the bakery. He had missed simply being in the kitchen and having a creative outlet every day. That said, working at Camp Ridgecrest might be the best decision he'd ever made. He'd needed to get away – from his parents and his life – so he could think through what he wanted from the rest of his college years.

His thoughts occupied his mind as his body moved by rote, squeezing just enough of the velvety glaze onto each cookie so that it spread across the top but did not spill over the sides.

He was concentrating so intently that the bell at the door of the bakery startled him. He quickly wiped away the overflow of icing he had inadvertently spilled before turning to the customers.

His chest tightened and he grinned in spite of himself as he recognized the women walking through the door.

"Yo, Peeta!" Johanna said. "I have been to this neighborhood a dozen times and never even noticed this place!"

"Hey! Yeah, it's kinda a hole-in-the-wall," he said. He looked over at Katniss and tried to make eye contact, but she was standing there looking everywhere but at him. "What brings you here?"

"We had to check out Mellark's now that we know it's here!"

"I'm glad you did," he said. As they peered in the cases, he reached behind the counter and got two small paper plates they usually used for samples. "Why don't y'all sit?" He motioned to the small cafe table in the corner. "Let me bring you a sample."

The girls sat and Peeta put two of the freshly glazed cookies on a plate and walked over to join them. "I just put the glaze on these, so they'll be a little messy," he said.

He sat down in a chair facing them as Katniss looked directly at him for the first time. She gave him a small smile as she bit into the cookie. "Oh my god," she said, closing her eyes. "This is so good."

It really was ridiculous how the way to her heart seemed to be through her stomach.

"Peeta," Johanna said, "we parked just out front on the curb. That OK?"

"Oh, actually, no. You'll get a ticket. The parking is in back. There's an alley between the buildings that leads to it."

"I told you, Jo," Katniss said, standing up with her keys in her hand, and Peeta gave her an apologetic smile. "OK. Be right back," she said.

Once they were alone, Johanna turned to Peeta with a serious look on her face. "We only have a few minutes," she said. "We gotta be quick."

Peeta looked at her quizzically. "What?"

"You like her, don't you?"

Peeta sat stunned for a minute, unsure of what to say.

"I think you do, and so does Madge. You've been treating this just right. Kat is easily scared, and the drunken night could have been a disaster. But Madge worked recon on it, and Katniss seems to have come out on the other side. You're gonna have to be patient with her. I can tell she likes you, but she's still trying to deny it."

"You came here today to give me a pep talk?"

She smirked at him. "Yeah, so don't blow it!"

He rubbed his eyes with one hand. "I'm doing my best," he admitted. "She's . . . well, she's tough."

"You wouldn't like her half as much if she weren't."

"Yeah, you're right."

The kitchen door swung open, and Delly emerged with a large tray of zucchini muffins. When she saw Peeta sitting with Johanna, she carefully set the tray on the counter.

"Delly," Peeta said, standing up. "Come out and meet a friend of mine from camp. Delly Cartwright, this is Johanna Mason."

Delly walked around the side of the counter wiping her hands on her apron before offering a hand to Jo. "Hi there," she said. "Nice to meet you."

Jo took her hand. "Hi," Jo said, looking at her strangely. "How do I know you?"

Delly looked confused. "I don't think you do," she said.

The bell at the door rang, and Katniss returned to the shop. Jo straightened up and said, "Looks like time for us to get going."

"So soon?" Peeta questioned. "What are y'all up to today?"

"I'm meeting Jo's landlord to sign a lease and put down a deposit."

"Are you heading back to Ellijay today?"

"I was planning to..."

"You could stay the night with me, Kat," Jo interrupted. "Drive home in the morning."

Peeta looked back at Katniss. "I'm working until four, but if you come back, there's somewhere I want to take you."

Katniss looked at him guardedly, but he just smiled at her. "Uh, I guess," she said.

"That's Katniss-speak for, 'Thanks. I'd love to,'" Jo said. "Sorry. Sometimes I have to translate."

* * *

Peeta was cleaning some pans when his mother came in through the back door. "Is Delly in front?" she asked.

"Yes. She'll be here tonight until close." He kept scrubbing, waiting for her reaction.

"Delly is closing? You've been gone all summer, and in your few days here, you can't put in a full day?"

"I was here this morning at five. I'd say an eleven hour day is a full day."

"Since when do you talk to your mother that way?"

"I'm sorry. All I meant was that I'm not slacking off."

"You're getting soft, Peeta. After playing in the woods all summer, you can't take a full day in the bakery anymore. I knew this was a bad idea. Nothing good will come of it."

Peeta turned away from the sink to face his mother. He grabbed a towel to dry his hands. "Mother, it's fine. I've missed working in the bakery, and I'm glad to be back for a few days. Really. And there's only a few more weeks of camp before everything goes back to usual." Peeta couldn't help but feel the disappointment radiating off of her as she turned and walked into the small office in the back.

Delly came in from the front and put an arm around her friend. "Don't worry," she murmured quietly. "She's just . . . well, you know."

"Yeah, I know." He smiled at her.

"So," she said. She raised her eyebrows. "What do you know about that girl Johanna?"

"I really don't know much about her. She used to work at camp but isn't this year. She came up a few weeks ago for Katniss' birthday, and that's the only time I've met her."

"And Katniss?"

Peeta let the question and its implication hang in the air. He walked back through the door to the front of the bakery, and Delly followed him. Away from the office and the presence of his mother, he let out a sigh.

Delly put her hands on his shoulders and faced him, looking carefully into his face.

"Wow," she said.

"Yeah, it's bad."

"What are you going to do?"

Peeta just smiled and nodded towards the front window where Katniss was walking on the sidewalk towards the bakery entrance. The bell rang as she opened the door, and Peeta began untying his apron.

He knew he was going to have to work hard to make her comfortable. As she stood just inside the doorway looking awkward and barely making eye contact, he knew that the stain of the previous weekend hadn't yet worn off.

"Hey," he said casually. "Did you get the lease taken care of?"

"Yeah. No problems."

"Where will you be living?" Delly asked.

"Johanna has a house near Tech, between 10th and 14th streets."

"Katniss, just give me a second to wash up, and I'll be ready to go. Do you want something to eat while you wait?" Her eyebrows shot up and he smiled. "Delly, would you give her one of those cookies you made?"

He walked through the swinging door towards the kitchen. After washing his hands and face, he stuck his head in the office. "Mother, I'm heading out."

"Where are you going?"

"Just out with a friend."

"Who?"

"A friend from camp. Would you like to meet her?"

She frowned at him. "I don't want to meet your camp friends. Can't you see I'm busy here?"

"OK. Well, I'll see you later." He walked back to the front where Delly had just finished saying something, and Katniss was covering a laugh with the palm of her hand. Peeta looked at both women. "What?"

"Oh nothing," Delly said with a big smile. "Katniss and I are just comparing interests."

Katniss had recovered by then and smiled benignly.

"OK." Peeta felt suspicious. "I'm ready. Katniss, are you ready?"

"I'm here," she said.

"Well then, let's go. See you tomorrow, Delly."

"Nice meeting you, Katniss!"

Peeta and Katniss walked out onto the sidewalk. The heat of the day radiated up from the asphalt. "So, do you want me to drive?" she asked.

"For our first stop, we don't need a car," he said, leading her to the street corner. The light changed, and he put his hand lightly on her back to guide her into the intersection. They crossed the street to what looked like an old shopping center. "This way," he said.

"What part of Atlanta is this?" she asked.

"Decatur," he said. He led her down the sidewalk in front of several different stores: a bike shop, an organic grocery store. Several windows showed vacancies. He stopped in front of one store.

"You are going to love this place. It's called Wuxtry, and it's my favorite record shop in Atlanta. They have some new stuff, CDs and tapes, but almost all of it is used records."

Her eyes grew wide as he spoke, and she grinned. "Oh my god, I'm so excited," she said.

He opened the door for her, and she walked in but stopped just inside the entrance. Wuxtry was, Peeta knew, impressive – especially for anyone coming in for the first time. The place was filled wall-to-wall with crates of albums. Hand-written labels directed customers to different sections: Rock, Blues, Jazz, Folk, World. Concert posters and memorabilia filled the walls. It was an overwhelming sensory experience. There was a small rack of CDs and another of cassette tapes, but clearly theimpetus for the shop was albums.

Elvis Costello was singing to them through the speakers. Peeta looked over at the guy behind the register. "Hey, man," he said.

"Peeta! Dude, I haven't seen you in forever."

"Yeah, I've been working at a summer camp."

"That's cool. I have a bootleg back here you might be interested in."

"Awesome. I'll come see it in a minute," Peeta said, turning back to Katniss, who was turning slowly, taking in everything around her.

"So, uh, the Rock is over here," Peeta said, pushing past her and leading her down a narrow path through the bins. "They specialize in Jazz, but there's a huge collection of Rock, too. You can find just about anything here."

He backed away. She smiled at him and ran her hands along a stack of albums.

Peeta returned to the register. "So Kenny, what do you have to show me?"

* * *

Almost ninety minutes later, Katniss and Peeta made their way back out of the store. Katniss was clutching an album in her hands, and he didn't think he'd ever seen her so animated before. He knew he'd never heard her speak with such abandon**.**

"I didn't even know 10,000 Maniacs put out concert albums," she said. "I mean, I guess, technically, they don't. They are at the top of my list to see play. Maybe I'll get to now that I'll be here. Though I don't know how much tickets cost. How expensive are shows?"

"It depends. At Variety Playhouse or smaller places like that, you can see a band for less than ten dollars. But the Maniacs are headlining these days, so it would probably be more like twenty. Maybe more, depending on where. I saw them open for Squeeze at the Fox back in 1987? I think? Maybe '88? It was when _In My Tribe_had just come out."

She was staring at him. "I am so jealous."

"Yeah, it was good. I had never heard of them before, but I bought the tape afterwards 'cause the show had been so good." They had reached the corner again, and Peeta began scanning traffic in order to cross the street. "I might have a crush on Natalie Merchant!"

She smiled again. "That might be the best thing about living in Atlanta – just getting to see live music! On a regular basis!" She gave him a look. "About the only live music we ever get is when Haymitch's country cover-band plays at Merv's"

He laughed. "Yikes."

"I know."

They crossed the street back to the bakery. "This was great," she said.

"Are you hungry?" He smiled at her.

She smiled. "I could eat," she said nonchalantly.

"Great." He headed back towards the bakery and held the door for her. "Give me just a second, OK?"

He walked into the kitchen. Delly was still there. "Hey," he said as he opened the industrial-sized refrigerator and pulled out a large basket.

"I was wondering what that was for," she said.

"Is Mom still around?" he asked.

"No. Left a little while ago."

Peeta walked back to the door and pushed it open. "Hey, my car's in back. Why don't you come through here, and we can go out the back door."

Katniss followed him back through the kitchen.

"Wuxtry?" Delly asked, seeing the bag Katniss was holding. "Fun."

"Yeah, it was," Katniss replied.

"We'll see you later," Peeta said, opening the back door.

Katniss walked into the back parking lot and spied the Suburban. "This yours?" she asked.

"Yeah. It's a tank, but I love it." He opened the door for her. "Don't ask about the mileage it gets." He walked to the driver's side, deposited the basket behind the front seat, and got in.

"So where are we going?"

"Well." He paused. "I thought I'd take you to Lullwater Park. It's really close by, right outside Emory. But it's this great park in the middle of the city, and when you're there, you almost forget that you're in Atlanta."

He glanced over at her as he pulled the car out of the parking lot. "I thought that, well, you might like to know about it. It's got lots of trees and grass and a small lake. I mean, I know you're going to miss the woods when you move here. And it's not like _the woods_, but, I don't know. For Atlanta, it's pretty nice."

She had been watching him as he spoke to her. He looked over at her quickly once more. As he finished his explanation, she turned to face out her window. "Sounds great," she said.

Peeta ended up finding a parking spot on a side street. He reached in the back for the basket and also grabbed a blanket that was there. He pointed out some of the buildings that made up the outer reaches of the Emory campus as they walked. Soon they reached a large, wrought iron archway over a paved road. "This way," he said, turning.

They walked mostly in silence for awhile as the road narrowed and turned. Finally they rounded a corner and saw a lake surrounded by grass and trees.

The breeze had picked up, and the wind coming off the water cooled their faces. The sun would soon be hidden behind the woods in the distance, and the air was already cooling off.

"It's beautiful," she said as they neared the lake. She picked up a rock and skipped it towards a patch of lily pads. "You can barely hear the traffic."

"Well, if we keep walking, there's a spot on the far side that's covered on one side by the trees. Over there, you won't hear the traffic at all."

It took them ten more minutes to get to the far side of the lake. Peeta left the path where the tree line swerved towards the water. Katniss followed him into the woods for a few minutes until they emerged back onto the grass with a clear view of the lake.

"Wow. Secret spot," she said.

"Nah," he said. "If we stay here past dark, we'll be overrun by teenagers coming to make out. This was _the_ spot to come in high school." He smiled at her. "But don't worry. Your virtue is safe with me." He didn't mean to allude to the previous weekend, but it was out of his mouth before he could pull it back in. _Careless, _he thought to himself.

Peeta spread out the blanket and stood up. Katniss was standing with her arms crossed over her chest looking off towards the lake. He walked over to her, lifted his hand, and with his thumb attempted to smooth the wrinkles that had developed on her forehead and between her eyes.

"What's this about?"

Katniss visibly swallowed and looked away. He could see her working to rid her face of whatever emotion was running through her.

"Let's eat," he said softly and went to open the picnic basket. He began pulling out more food than the two of them could eat - sandwiches wrapped in butcher paper, grapes and oranges, cans of Coke and Diet Coke, and a bakery box.

Katniss sat down, and he tossed her a sandwich. She began opening it. "What is this?" she asked.

"Brie and smoked turkey on sourdough. And note the difference good bread makes."

She was already biting into it. "Mmm hmm," she said through a mouthful. She chewed for a minute. "What else is in here? Something crunchy and delicious."

"Granny smith apples," he said. "Can I just say that I'm really glad you're not a picky eater." She smiled at him as she chewed, and he was relieved that the tense moment from before seemed to have passed.

"How's Prim?" he asked after a pause. "Did you go home before coming here?"

"Yeah, I was there a couple of nights. She's good."

"And she'll be at camp for senior high week, right?"

"Yes," she said somewhat deliberately and then paused. She reached for the grapes and pulled a handful off the stems. "I can't believe she's gotten so much older," she said, eating a grape. "She's just always seemed so much younger than me, but she's really not anymore. She's practically a peer."

The way she said that last remark made Peeta ask, "Is that good or bad?"

"I don't know," she said with some wonder in her voice. "No, I mean, of course it's good. But things are just really different between us now."

"She still needs you."

Katniss looked at him a long moment. "Sometimes I wonder if she does," she said. "She seems to understand things better than I do most of the time. And she's got a boyfriend! I don't know what to do with that piece of information."

Peeta began peeling an orange. "Is he a good guy? Do you know him?"

"I actually know him really well. It's Gale's younger brother, Rory. They've been friends for years."

"That's good, right?" He offered her a few sections of orange.

She took the orange slices and popped one into her mouth. "Yes," she said hesitantly. "I don't know. I'd have thought it'd be like dating her brother. At least, that's what it was like when Gale and I tried to date."

"You dated Gale?" Peeta thought he succeeded in keeping his voice neutral though inside he felt his heart slow down.

She gave him a sideways glance. "We went out, like, twice. At the end of the second date, I couldn't bear for him to kiss me. It was just too weird. I started laughing, and then he did, too, and that was the end of us."

"Hmm. Maybe it will be the same for Prim."

"Nope. Caught him kissing her twice, and, uh, it wasn't very brotherly."

"How old is she now? Sixteen? Seventeen? It's not like she's too young."

"That's the problem. In my head, she will always be too young. But then she says things to me that make me realize that she's got her life together, more than I did at that age, for sure. Maybe even more than I do now."

"I know that it's an adjustment, but isn't it good to get to a place where the two of you can be equals? I've always thought it would be great to have a sibling that you're close to."

"Your brothers aren't that much older, are they?"

"No. Not that much, but we just have nothing in common." He put the last piece of orange in his mouth. "I guess none of us is making an effort anymore. But when I was Prim's age, I could have used a brother who gave a shit about what I was doing."

"What were you doing?"

"Just treading water. Not making my own decisions. Not questioning anything that was fed to me. Just trying to appease my mother." He looked up at her and smiled. "But I can't complain too much. I eventually started thinking for myself."

"Well, Prim definitely does that."

"She had to have learned that from you." They had finished the sandwiches. "Do you have room for dessert?" he asked.

She raised her eyebrows as he began opening the bakery box. "Always. What's that?"

He passed her a small round pastry on a napkin. "It's called a Caramel Apple Granny," he said. He licked some caramel off of his thumb. "It's basically a miniature apple tart."

"Do you see how I'm showing restraint," she said, taking a dainty bite. "It's delicious, but no cracks about my eating."

"I love that you eat," he said. "It's one of the many things I like about you." He could see her freeze mid-bite. "Now, don't do that," he said. "I see you tensing up over there. Don't. Tell me about your major, because honestly, I'm not sure I know what environmental studies is. Or is it are? Studies are? Studies is?"

She laughed and started talking, carrying the conversation through dessert and answering his questions as they packed up the basket. He had realized that he essentially needed to bully her away from the silences, the moods when she clammed up inside her own head. He wasn't sure what was going on at these moments, but he was figuring out how to negotiate them.

As they exited the park and returned to his car, they had fallen into silence once again, only this time it was comfortable.

"Isn't Fernbank around here?" she asked as they drove back in the direction of the bakery.

"Yeah, it's practically just down the street. You'll be over this way a lot this year, I guess. Do you know what your hours will be?"

"Not yet. They had said they could work around my class schedule – if I have a class schedule."

Peeta pulled into a parking spot and turned off the ignition. "What did Haymitch say about your meeting with the Trustees?"

"He didn't know anything when I left." She reached for the door handle and got out of the car. "Maybe he'll know something when I get back."

Peeta met her on her side. "When will you get back? What's your plan for the rest of the week?"

"I'll be home, and then Prim and I both will head back to camp on Saturday." Peeta looked down at her as she spoke. It was getting dark, and her skin looked soft in the dim light. "What about you?" she asked, looking up at him. He knew he was looking at her intently, knew he needed to relax his face, but he couldn't seem to. Her eyes widened a bit as she saw his expression.

He waited for her to look away. When she didn't, he lifted his hand to her neck. He dropped his eyes to follow his hand on her skin as he ran his fingertips over her collarbone, brushed the back of his hand up her throat, ran his thumb across her cheek.

He looked at her again, and she was staring at him. Her eyes weren't guarded but he could tell she was nervous. He could feel her shiver under his fingertips.

God, he was trembling, too. He slowly lowered his lips to hers. He could feel her barely stiffen as he lightly kissed her. He took a quick breath and kissed her again, pulling on her lower lip, trying to coax her to him. He felt her arms slide up his back as she opened her mouth slightly. His hands were cupping her face now, and he could feel his whole body shudder, reacting to her. He broke the kiss gently and rested his forehead on hers. His breath was shaky. She was silent beneath him.

"Are you OK?" he asked, pulling back to look at her.

"I think so," she said in a small voice, her hands still holding his waist.

He had an overwhelming urge to tell her everything, let her know how long he had wanted this, how much he thought of her. How much he wanted to help her and protect her. How much she inspired him. How much he admired her strength and resilience. How beautiful she was. How he didn't want to let her go. Ever.

But he knew - he knew that would lead to disaster. So instead, he said, "One more cookie for the road?" Laughter bubbled up from inside her, and he kissed her, quickly, once more.

She followed him back into the bakery. He put the picnic basket down by the sink and retrieved the box from inside. He went to her then as she stood by the island workspace. Reaching to her waist, he lifted her onto the counter. With her face just above his now, he reached up and kissed her again before handing her a cookie.

"Sit here while I pull some stuff together."

He put some apple tarts into a small bag. Then he disappeared into the front of the store, returning with a loaf of bread and a flattened larger bag. He shook it open and put the loaf and the tarts in and set it down beside her on the counter.

"What's your favorite flavor? Like for cakes or cookies or something."

"Uh, lemon. Sae makes these really crisp lemon cookies..."

"With a lemon glaze?"

"Yes."

"Yes, we make those, though we don't have any right now. Hold on." He disappeared to the front again and came back a minute later with another small bag. "Lemon pound cake," he said, holding up the bag. You'll have to tell me what you think."

He returned to her perch and put the cake in the bag. Then he turned to her. "Make sure you save some for Prim," he said, kissing her. He could feel her smile into his kiss. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him.

Her response was stronger this time. He stepped between her legs, and he felt them tighten at his waist. Her hands were in his hair. She opened her mouth to him, and he tentatively probed with his tongue, lightly touching hers and tasting the sweetness of the cookie she had eaten.

It was there, again. He wanted to tell her, had to tell her. Almost more than wanting to kiss her he wanted her to _know._When she pulled away, panting a little, he pulled her down off the counter and held her close.

"When you drive away, are you going to freak out and start ignoring me again?"

Feeling her stiffen in his arms, he pulled away and tilted her chin up to him so she could see the teasing in his face. "'Cause I'm going to be harder to get rid of this time."

"I'll do my best," she said. She smiled at him, and he thought it might be the most glorious sight he had seen. He was absolutely breaking apart, just barely holding himself together.

She reached up with her hands and pulled him into a quick kiss before saying, "I should go. So when are you coming back to camp?"

"Saturday night," he said, holding her hand as he walked to the door. "We close at four on Saturdays, and I'll head up after that."

She hesitated. "So, um, do you want to come over Saturday when you get back? I could fix some dinner. I mean, if you want?"

His chest tightened as he saw her uncertainty. "Yes," he said. "I'd love to."

* * *

**A/N** So Peeta clearly shows his love with food since he can't really tell her just yet. Hope this chapter didn't make you too hungry.

Elvis Costello is for Jeeno2. Sorry, Jeeno, that it's such a paltry mention. He almost ended up on the cutting room floor.

I've been updating weekly up until this point, but the next chapter will probably be two weeks from now. I have a huge RL deadline in a week, and I also want to put together a prompt or two for Prompts in Panem. (If you don't know what this is, go over to .com. It's gonna be awesome!)

As always, I am so grateful to the lovely Bohemian, BohemianRider for her beta skills and general support! You should head over to her profile page to see an example of her artwork - and look for more after the next round of PiP!


	7. Chapter 7: The Fish Bowl

In the car on the way back to Blue Ridge, Peeta couldn't help but think of Katniss. He'd been busy in the bakery the past few days, and he'd tried not to dwell on her too much. And anyway, he'd had another surprising development to think about: Delly.

The day after he took Katniss to the park, Delly had quizzed him about every detail, good naturedly teasing him when he blushed and grinned like a fool. She'd wanted to know how it had happened with Katniss, how he'd known.

"It's hard to explain," he'd said. "I knew her distantly when we were little, and I always wondered about her. I didn't really understand it at the time, I guess. And I remember when we moved, I wasn't even really that sad. It was like, I just knew I'd see her again."

He looked at her sheepishly. "I know it sounds melodramatic, but when I saw her again at the beginning of the summer, it was this feeling of clarity. I knew I had to know her again."

Delly was silent. "So it wasn't like love at first sight."

"No, not really."

Delly was quiet as they worked. "What's on your mind?" he asked, finally.

She didn't answer right away. Peeta picked up the towel next to him and wiped his hands clean before hoisting himself up onto the counter to wait.

"Peeta," she said, finally. "There's something I want to tell you. But I don't really know how."

"You know you can tell me anything."

"Well, it's like this. I think I'm gay. Well, no that's not right. I know I'm gay." She looked at him steadily for the first time since starting this conversation. "I'm gay," she said again.

Peeta slid off the counter and pulled her into his arms. "Why were you worried about telling me?" he asked.

She hugged him tightly and her voice squeaked out over his shoulder. "I don't know! I've wanted to tell you for awhile now, but no one here knows. It's like I've got these two separate lives, who I am at school and who I am at home, but I don't know how to join them. And I just didn't know how you'd react. I was afraid you'd be mad that I've been hiding something from you."

"Delly, Delly," he said, interrupting her and breaking the embrace so he could face her. "I will always love you, no matter what. You were my first friend, the first person who ever really cared about me. That will never change."

She pulled him closer into another hug. "I know. It's just felt hard."

"Nothing with me should ever stress you out." He held her a few moments before saying, "But now, you have to tell me details."

Peeta smiled at the memory. Delly's face had lit up like he'd rarely seen it as she'd recounted her experiences in college – how she had finally embraced the woman she wanted to be. But the biggest surprise of the conversation had come last when she had asked again about Johanna.

He really didn't know if Johanna was gay. It seemed like she was hooking up with Finnick, and he'd told Delly as much. Maybe Katniss would know.

* * *

The two hour drive to Blue Ridge dragged, but he finally made it back to camp. He stopped by his cabin to drop off his stuff before heading up to hers. He was giddy, and he knew he needed to calm down because he wasn't sure what kind of state he'd find her in.

He really, really hoped Katniss was not freaking out, but he wouldn't be too surprised to find her that way. He felt like he was starting to understand her tendencies – not really the reason for those tendencies – but the tendencies nonetheless.

When he knocked on the door, he could hear a guitar and then a male voice he didn't recognize telling him to come on in.

In her small den, most of the futon was taken up by a large boy with dark hair cascading into his eyes. He was picking a nondescript tune on a very weathered guitar. He looked up when Peeta walked in, flicking his long bangs out of his eyes, and nodded his head in Peeta's direction.

"You must be Peeta!"

Peeta turned towards the voice and saw a tall, blonde girl walking towards him from the kitchen.

"And you must be Prim," he said. He extended his hand and she took it gently in her own, giving a soft squeeze as she smiled up at him. She was delicately beautiful. He could see the resemblance to Katniss in her high cheek bones and the thin curve of her lips.

"I am so glad to meet you," she said. "I'm looking forward to getting to know you because Katniss has barely told me anything."

"That doesn't surprise me, I guess," he said with a wry grin. "I vaguely remember you. You were young when we left Ellijay."

"Let me introduce you to Rory," she said, moving across the room and pulling the boy up off the couch.

Rory stood, moving the guitar to his hip so he could extend his hand.

"Nice to meet you. You're Gale's brother, right?" Peeta said.

"Yeah, you've met him?"

"Yeah, a few weeks ago."

"Katniss is in the kitchen," Prim said with a knowing smile, "if you want to go in."

"Thanks," said Peeta, turning and taking the few steps across the den to the kitchen. He stopped inside the doorway and looked at her. She was at the counter chopping tomatoes and looking like she was concentrating intently.

"Hey," he said.

She turned to him briefly and smiled and said, "Hi," so quietly he could barely hear her over the sound of water simmering briskly on the stove.

She looked uncomfortable. She looked embarrassed.

He walked to stand beside her and put his hand on her shoulder, briefly rubbing her neck.

"How are you?" he asked.

"Good," she said, not looking up.

"Can I do anything to help?"

"Give the penne a stir? Make sure it's not sticking?"

"Sure," he said, moving to the stove. "Looks fine. I'm going to turn down the heat a little." He turned back to her. "Thanks for cooking."

"It's nothing special. In fact, that pasta should be about done. Can you strain it? And then put it back into the pot?"

There was a colander in the sink, so he dumped it in and shook it out before returning it to the large Dutch oven. Katniss met him at the stove, turning the heat completely off before drizzling the penne with olive oil. Then she tossed in the tomatoes, chopped fresh basil, and salt.

"This smells fantastic," he said.

"My mother sent us back with the surplus from her garden," she said, wiping her hands on a towel. "Can you let them know we're ready to eat?"

"Mmm hmm," he said, taking her face in his hands. She looked up at him, her gray eyes nervous. He leaned down and softly kissed her lips, gently tugging on the bottom one as he pulled away.

"Hi," he said. He smiled as her face flushed deeply.

"Hey," she whispered. He left her to call the others.

* * *

Peeta and Prim carried most of the conversation over dinner, with Katniss contributing periodically and Rory only speaking when directly spoken to, but Peeta was glad to get a chance to talk with Prim and gain a better understanding of Katniss through her. He could see in their interaction the strong bond between them. Katniss was clearly overprotective and Prim indulged her patiently.

It was like Katniss had said: in some ways, Prim was more self-aware than Katniss was.

"Are you excited about your week, Prim?" he asked her.

"Can't wait! I've been waiting to be a senior high camper ever since I started coming here. It's going to be awesome! And Madge is going to be my counselor again, and my friend Rue is coming back, too. It'll be epic."

"Madge is my co-counselor this week, so we'll be in the same group."

"Really? So cool!

"Rory, are you staying for camp?"

The boy peered out from under his hair and shook his head. "No," he said. "I gotta work."

"Yeah? Where?"

"Just at the limestone plant in Ellijay."

"And are you in a band?"

"Sorta."

Peeta waited a moment before realizing Rory wasn't going to say anything else. "Cool," he said, looking over at Katniss and raising his eyebrows a bit.

She smiled at him.

* * *

When dinner was over, Rory and Prim did dishes while Peeta and Katniss sat at the table and talked. Soon enough the two were done and heading for the door.

"We're going to go for a walk before Rory heads home," Prim announced.

"OK," Katniss said, watching them walk out the door. "Hey," she said suddenly turning to Peeta. "I have something new to play for you."

"New? As in the last five years?"

"As in just came out." She knelt by the stereo. "Prim gave me a birthday present while I was home. Have you heard the Jayhawks before?" A jangly guitar arose from the speakers as she stood up. "I like it a lot. It's really different."

"Never heard of them," he said, rising to meet her in the middle of the room. He reached out for her hips, pulling her to him. "I'm glad to see you."

She blushed again, and Peeta thought he'd never seen anything quite so alluring as that blush. She raised her hands to his arms, sliding them up to his shoulders. "Me, too," she said.

And then she reached for him, and Peeta thrilled at the feeling of her hands pulling his face down to her. He let her lead this time, holding back as she tentatively directed the kiss. He could feel her rising to meet him and this time he could respond, could give in to the urge to pull her in tight. His arms grabbed her up to him, pulling her almost off her feet as she licked at his lips and tongue.

"Do you want to sit?" Her question came to him through a haze.

"Mmm hmm."

She backed her way to the futon, not letting go of him as they fell across it. He caught himself on his elbows, one foot still on the floor, trying hard not to put too much weight on her, but her arms pulled him down fully.

"You smell like the bakery," she said, sighing into his mouth. Peeta felt like he was losing consciousness. Her body was soft beneath him as she pulled him to her, and he felt the danger of giving in too fully ring in the back of his mind.

He drew back and buried his head in her neck, inhaling deeply. Her hands ran down his back, squeezing him until they returned to his head and raked their way through his hair.

He shifted so he was on his side lying next to her, his head propped up on his hand. He let his other hand rest gently on her hip, skimming below the hemline of her t-shirt.

"I was worried," he said.

"About what?"

"You. I didn't know if you'd regret the other night or something." He looked down at her. "I wasn't sure what to expect."

She didn't answer him for a moment. "I don't regret anything."

He waited for her to say more, but when she didn't, he said, "I've wanted to kiss you for a long time." She pulled him closer and turned into his chest, hiding from him. "Does that make you uncomfortable?"

"No. Well, maybe."

"Why?"

"I just don't know what to say. How do I respond to that?"

"You don't have to say anything."

She hesitated a beat before saying, "What do you expect from me?"

He was a little thrown by her question. What did he expect? "I don't have a set of expectations, Katniss," he said finally. "I just want to be near you."

She seemed to relax at this, nodding imperceptibly before seeking him again. He felt her shift so that one of his thighs wedged between hers. He felt every impulse in his body seeking her, urging him toward her. He gave in and pushed against her, his thigh buried between her legs. She gasped into his mouth just as his hand clasped the back of her head, his fingers twining in her hair. He broke the kiss, running his lips along her chin, neck, collar bone. He sucked on the bone just there, and she arched to meet him.

His senses were blown. He could only focus on each point of contact with her, the sensation of his lips on her skin, the feel of her body as she pressed against him, her smooth calves wrapped around his.

"Ahem."

His head fell to her chest a split second before he looked up. And then Katniss was pushing him off of her and sitting up. Prim stood in the doorway, looking wickedly amused.

"Rory had to start for home," she said, walking into the room and looking down at them. "And I guess I should go to bed since we'll be up late all week!" She looked meaningfully down at the futon that they were sitting on.

Katniss stood and walked to the table to take a gulp from her water glass.

"Well, I guess I should leave you to your night," Peeta said.

Prim took the hint. "I'm gonna go wash up," she said, disappearing towards the bathroom.

Katniss looked at him from across the room. He could see the difference in her that Prim's presence had brought about, but he knew now how to calm her down.

"C'mere," he said, standing. He reached for her, threading his fingers in her belt loops and pulling her towards him. She came easily, pliable in his hands. He shuddered at her open way of allowing her body to react to his.

He kissed her mouth with a heat that he hoped showed her everything he was feeling. Showed her how much he wanted her. Not just her body but all of her. He ran his tongue over her lips once and then nipped at them. A giggle bubbled up from inside her and he smiled. He loved that he could make this serious woman giggle. He kissed her again, kissed her cheek, and finally pulled her against him so that he could feel all of her flattened against him. He rested his cheek on her hair.

"I don't think I've ever heard you giggle," he said.

"I don't giggle very often."

"I'll accept that as a challenge," he said. He pulled back, ran his thumb over her cheek and kissed her there one more time before letting go of her. "I'll see you tomorrow," he said.

"Yes," she said, but she tugged on his hand, pulling him back for one last kiss. He breathed deeply from her mouth, breathing in every bit of her one last time. He opened his eyes and saw Prim hovering in the hallway.

He sighed. "See you," he said quietly and turned to the door.

* * *

Peeta was putting his clothes away and generally straightening up the cabin the next morning when Finnick rapped on his doorway and then let himself in.

"Hey man," he said, sitting down on one of the empty bunks. "What's up? How was Atlanta?"

"Good! Yeah, good. It was great to be home for a little bit. You?"

"Good."

"What's the latest on that girl?"

Finnick's green eyes contracted just a bit as he lounged on the bed. "Ahh. Well, I did see her again. But there's no way I'll ever get anywhere with her. She's not at all in to me."

"Her loss then, man. What's her name?"

"Annie." The man sat quiet in thought before shaking it off and saying, "What about you? Any progress with our resident conservationist?"

Peeta knew he was grinning again, so he turned his back, putting the last of his clothes in the trunk under his bed. "Yep."

"Yeah? Yes, as in, yes you made progress?"

"Yep."

"Dude! How far did you get with the ice queen?"

"Finnick."

"Not telling?"

"Nope."

"Mmm hmm. I guess I'm not surprised. OK, but promise me the story soon, right?" He got up from the bunk and started for the door.

"Yeah, we'll see," said Peeta. "And Finnick, what are you going to do about Annie?"

"I don't know."

"But you're gonna do something, right?"

"Yeah."

"Good."

* * *

"Hey y'all!"

Peeta and Katniss were leaving the dining hall after eating lunch. Very few people had been there, but camp was clearly back to life as they walked out onto the green. The parking lot was half-filled, and everywhere he could see counselors going in and out of cabins. They turned to see Madge calling to them from across the yard.

"Hey," Peeta said, giving her a hug. "How was your break?"

"Excellent," she said, turning to Katniss and embracing her friend. "Kat, I saw Gale. We need to compare notes."

Katniss looked surprised. "Definitely!"

Madge smiled brightly before asking, "Is Prim here?"

"Yeah, but she's still asleep. I need to go up and wake her so she's ready when registration starts."

"Tell her hey for me. Can't wait to see her." She turned to Peeta. "Hey, instead of games, why don't we do the creek hike this afternoon?"

"Sounds good. Can I swing by your cabin in a bit so we can finish planning the week?"

"Perfect," she said, heading up the stairs to the dining hall. "See you later."

They walked down the path towards their cabins. There weren't many people around, but Peeta lowered his voice as he said, "Hey, tell me about Johanna."

"What do you want to know?"

"Well, is she gay? Or bi? Not that I care, but my friend Delly was wondering."

Katniss looked at him with wide eyes. "Oh! Well, yeah, she's bi. Did she come on to Delly?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. Maybe? But Delly is definitely interested."

"How do you know Delly?"

"I live next door to her. Ever since we moved back to Atlanta, we've been friends. And, well, we dated in high school, but it didn't last too long."

"I guess not."

"Ha. Yeah."

They had begun to cross the bridge when he pulled on her hand to stop her. "Do you mind if I don't walk you back up? I have a lot to do to get ready for this afternoon."

Her brow furrowed. "Of course," she said. "I don't need to you walk me up."

Her tone threw him off. "I know you don't need me to. I just want to. But I can't."

"Peeta, whatever."

She was prickly, and all of her defenses were up. He leaned in to kiss her, and she froze.

She was looking over his shoulder. Ahh, that was it. He turned to see Glimmer, who had just come out of his cabin, watching them with obvious interest.

"I'm gonna go," she said, turning. "See you later."

Peeta sighed in frustration.

* * *

"So was it good to get back to Atlanta?" Peeta and Madge had finished their planning, and he was getting ready to go.

"Yeah! It was. Being away from the bakery has made me appreciate it more."

"So, is that all you did?" Her tone seemed to imply something.

"What are you asking?" he said.

"Oh nothing. Just wondering if, ah, you got to see anyone?"

"So you don't know?"

"No! Is there something to know?"

Peeta couldn't help but smile, but his happiness was tempered by the awkward moment on the bridge an hour before.

"Well, yeah, I think so. But do you think you should let Katniss tell you? I mean, she's so private. I'm not sure what she wants me to say."

"Peeta! Something has happened! Just answer yes or no questions, OK? I'll get the details from her. Uh, so you saw her in Atlanta?"

"Yes."

"Did you spend time alone?"

"Yes."

"Was it a date?"

"Um, yes? I think so. Maybe not originally, but it turned into one."

"So did you kiss her?"

"Yes."

Madge fell back on her bed and squealed. Peeta knew he was blushing but was happy all the same. She looked up at him and sat up.

"OK, I'm walking you out because I can't wait any longer to get the details from her."

"You'll have to let me know what she says. I'm wondering how much she would want me to tell."

"Sounds like y'all need to talk."

"Yeah, we do."

* * *

Senior high week was going to be interesting, Peeta could tell from the very first day. He'd been with younger kids all summer, but the senior high kids really weren't that much younger than he – some only two years below him.

The boys in his cabin seemed OK, but the vibes he was getting from Madge's girls were palpable. He felt his guard go up.

Prim, especially, was taking liberties, treating him like an old friend from the start and running right through any boundaries he was trying to set. As they ended the creek hike at the falls, the girls all headed for the bank of the pool, stripping off their t-shirts to reveal skimpy bathing suits. As they sunned and giggled, alternately flirting with the boys and ignoring them, Peeta found himself looking away.

The afternoon air was hot and sticky, and Peeta waded out into the water a bit to cool off. He ducked his head under the cold water and then stood back up, tossing his hair out of his eyes and sending droplets spraying out around him. Rivulets of water ran under the collar of his t-shirt, cooling him off as it trickled down his back.

Madge had followed him out, and he turned to her. "This is a very different dynamic," he said, motioning towards the bank where the kids were flaunting their hormones.

"I know. When I first started working here as a counselor, I had just graduated high school. So I had campers who were literally the same age as me. It was hard not to flirt."

"Well, I don't think I'll have that problem, but fending off the flirting is a different story."

"Yes. You'll need to perfect the art of being aloof."

"I guess." He ran his hands through his hair, shaking out the excess water. "So, uh, did you talk to Katniss?"

He was practicing being aloof, but Madge laughed at him.

"Yes! Sounds like you, sir, planned the perfect date! I congratulate you."

He was blushing again and smiling at the memory. "I feel like I'm starting to understand her better, but she's still really hard to read at times."

"Like what?"

"Well," he hesitated. He knew he needed help but he struggled because Madge was Katniss' friend first. He didn't want to put her in the middle.

"Peeta," she said carefully, "I really want to help. I really want this to happen for both of you."

He turned and put his arm around her. "Thanks."

She squeezed him back and pulled away, smiling. "Now tell me."

"Did she tell you that she, uh, kinda freaked out this afternoon?"

"Go on."

"Well, I don't know. Things were fine, and then I asked her if it was OK if I didn't walk her up to her cabin." He huffed out a sigh of frustration. "And she got all defensive, saying she didn't _need_ me to walk her up there. And then when I tried to kiss her, she totally froze. I guess because Glimmer was right there?" He grimaced. "I should have thought ahead of time that she'd be uncomfortable with PDA."

"Oh, I'm sure it's going to be a long time before she's comfortable with that. This place is a fishbowl, Peeta! She's going to have trouble with everyone knowing her business!" He rolled his eyes at this though he knew she was right.

"But Peeta, you also have to remember that she's been doing everything for herself for forever. She didn't have anyone to help her for so long that, it's like, she doesn't know how to accept help from anyone. So you suggesting she needed you to walk her home . . . "

"I wasn't saying she needed me to walk her home!" he barked.

"I know that, but this is Katniss we're talking about! Just because you've had these amazing make-out sessions doesn't mean that she's suddenly a different person!"

"Yeah, yeah, you're right. I know you're right." He paused a moment. "So she said the make-out sessions were amazing?" He couldn't contain his smile.

Madge turned and shoved him backwards into the water. "Now don't get cocky on me, Mellark." But she was smiling as she turned away to the kids and yelled, "OK, now who's ready to make a human dam?"

* * *

During senior high week, the counselors were not allowed free time out of the cabins at night because the campers didn't go to bed until after 11. But Peeta had not seen Katniss since the bridge, and he was still feeling antsy about it, so after they turned out the cabin lights, he told Dalton he'd be back soon and slipped out the door.

He jogged lightly up the path to her cabin and then stood outside it for a moment to catch his breath. The moon was bright that night, almost full, and he could see clearly the steps to her door. The light in the living room was off, but through the screen door, he could see a light on in the back, and he felt sure she was still awake.

He knocked tentatively. After a few minutes with no sound, he knocked again, louder, and soon heard movements from inside.

He saw her come through the kitchen and into the living room wearing a thin white t-shirt and boxers. When she saw him, she stopped.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey." She moved closer and pushed open the screen door. "You're not supposed to be out of your . . . "

He cut her off with his lips, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her roughly to him. A gasp of air escaped her lips as he held her tightly. Her hands found his face, and she grasped him there, her thumbs stroking his cheekbones, before burying her hands in his hair. His body came alive under her touch. He ran a hand up her side, grazing the side of her breast before continuing up to her shoulder blade. And then his hand was tangled in her hair, gently pulling her head in tandem with his own.

They came up gasping a moment later, and he felt elated to feel her pressing her breasts against his chest as she hugged him to her.

Finally he pulled back slightly so he could trace his hand along her jaw. "Hi." He gently nipped her neck.

"Hi," she said, breathless.

"I needed to see you."

"I'm glad you did."

"I can't stay."

"I know."

"When will I see you again?"

She was breathing heavily, and it took her a moment to respond.

"I don't know. The campout?"

He groaned. The all-camp campout was Tuesday night. "I don't want to wait until then," he said. "Come eat with us in the dining hall."

"If I can make it to meals, I'll look for you," she said.

"Hmm . . ." he hummed into her neck. "I guess that's the best I can hope for."

She reached for his head, lifting it to her face. She kissed him again, gently, grazing his top lip with her tongue. His hands found the edge of her t-shirt, and he slowly ran his hands up her back, reveling in the feel of her skin.

He groaned again. "I really have to go." He took a deep breath and kissed her once more.

"Good night," he said softly, turning back down the path and into the darkness.


	8. Chapter 8: Dancing

Katniss felt like a swirling jumble of nerves and dread and excitement and anxiety. She had been avoiding the dining hall because she just couldn't figure out how to behave around Peeta in front of other people. So Monday had gone by with her successfully eluding him – though she wondered if she should consider this a success. He was constantly surrounded by people. She had never really thought about how popular he seemed to be. Her forehead wrinkled as she tried to sift through what was happening.

She couldn't stop her mind from wandering to him in the quiet moments of her day. How had this happened? She had never wanted a boyfriend, especially not here at camp when all the counselors hooked up with each other, changing partners every week or two like square dancers making their way around the square. She didn't want that and certainly didn't want to be associated with that.

As she ate some leftover pasta on her futon that night, she wondered if he would come by. She hoped so, but she also realized how hypocritical that was when she'd purposely avoided him all day. The evening grew late as she tried to read her book. He wouldn't be there – if he came at all – until after 11. She flipped through her albums, choosing music she wanted him to hear. She hand-washed some clothes and set them over the shower curtain rod to dry. She got out her paperwork for Georgia Tech and read through the course descriptions of classes she wanted to sign up for.

She waited.

At midnight, she finally gave up. He would have been here by now if he was going to come. She turned off the lights, brushed her teeth, and got in bed. The night was hot and still, the humidity weighing down on her like a guilty conscience. No wind came through the screens of her windows.

She flopped over in the bed, annoyed with herself. She realized she was being a hypocrite but couldn't help it.

Maybe she'd go to breakfast in the morning.

* * *

The camp awoke Tuesday morning to a steady drizzle. Katniss groaned, mentally going through her list of things to do and figuring out which ones she would have to postpone because of the rain.

She resolved to go to breakfast in the dining hall. In her avoidance of Peeta, she'd ended up avoiding Prim, as well, and she really wanted to see her sister. That's what she told herself. So she nervously made her way through the rain to the dining hall.

In the breakfast line, she heard counselors conferring about the possibility of the campout that night. Spotting Peeta and Madge's table, Katniss walked over and put her tray down next to Prim and across from Peeta.

"Morning," she said, giving a half-hug to Prim and glancing quickly at Peeta before looking away. She could feel her face burning as she struggled to control her facial expressions. Ugh. Her stomach flip-flopped when she saw the expression on his face. It was embarrassing to have all these feelings crashing down on her. She felt like every emotion she was having was written across her face, and it irked her.

After most had gotten their meals and were seated, Haymitch gave a loud whistle to get everyone's attention.

"Looks like we're going to have to postpone the all-camp campout tonight," he said. The room erupted in conversations, and there were audible cries of disappointment. Haymitch held up his hands to quiet everyone before continuing. "Now hold on, hold on, here's what we're gonna do. The forecast calls for rain all day today but clearing tonight. With any luck, the sun tomorrow will dry up the meadow enough so that by Thursday we can camp up there."

He waited a moment until the kids quieted down once more. "So we'll swap nights for the campout and the dance." A loud cheer erupted, but Haymitch pushed on. "We'll dance tonight and camp on Thursday!"

He had to shout to be heard over the din at the end, but no one was listening anyway. Prim and Rue were whispering and giggling. Madge rolled her eyes.

"This might be a good thing," Madge said. "They haven't had much time to get to know each other yet, so maybe there won't be too much grinding at the dance tonight."

"Yes," Peeta replied, "but by Thursday night, they _will_ know each other, and they'll be sneaking off into the woods."

Katniss met his eyes as she felt movement under the table. Peeta's legs enveloped one of hers in a tight squeeze.

As campers finished breakfast, the dining hall emptied slowly since the kids had nowhere to go. "What's the plan?" Katniss asked. "How will y'all dispose of this rainy day?"

"As long as there's no thunder, we'll still go swimming this afternoon," Madge supplied. "But we'll probably cut it short and play games in the field house."

"We're lucky we have crafts this morning," Peeta said. "So that doesn't have to change."

They stood to take their trays to the counter, and after doing so, Peeta grabbed her hand and pulled her back through the door to the kitchen as everyone else exited the dining hall.

"Hi," he said, squeezing her fingertips before moving his hands to her hips.

She looked around and, confident they couldn't be seen, leaned in to kiss him, a quick, chaste peck. "Hi."

"I missed you yesterday."

She squirmed under his gaze, not sure what to say to him. Instead, she leaned into him again, kissing him deeper this time, and feeling her anxiety ebb as his hands traveled up from her hips and pulled her in closer.

"Will you come to the dance tonight?"

"Oh, uh, I don't know," she said, her face buried in his neck. "I've never been to one of the dances before."

"So come."

"Well, I don't really dance, so . . ."

"So come to see me."

She knew she was blushing. The mere thought of spending time at the dance with him and all the others around, well, it made her almost queasy. No way was she going to dance with him.

He pulled back and looked at her again with that look, that half smile, where one side of his lips almost disappeared into his cheek and the other opened up, exposing the slightest hint of teeth. The smile that said he had a secret, and she was the only one he wanted to tell it to. Her stomach flipped again.

"OK."

* * *

Katniss spent most of the afternoon crawling around on the roof of B-1 trying to find the leak that was bringing water into the cabin right above one of the bunks.

Arriving back at her cabin wet and cold, she took a long, hot shower before shrugging into her robe and pouring herself a bowl of cereal for dinner. She nervously paced around her cabin with the bowl in her hand. She really, really didn't want to go to the dance.

What would Peeta expect of her? Was he expecting a big reveal moment? Look everyone, Peeta managed to bag Katniss! She flushed thinking of it. She could just imagine the look on Glimmer's face. Or Haymitch! What would he say?

In the back of her mind, she knew she was making a big deal out of nothing. She remembered what he'd said to her on Saturday night. _I don't have a set of expectations. I just want to be near you._

Sitting back down on the futon, Katniss set the barely-eaten cereal on the side table and leaned back. She allowed her mind to think back to that moment in this very spot, when the weight of him on top of her had stilled the voices in her head and allowed her to simply feel.

Would he want her to dance with him?

Katniss sat still for a moment and imagined a slow dance with Peeta. If only they could be alone. She just couldn't imagine sharing such an intimate moment with the whole camp.

* * *

Dances were held in 'the Barn' - a large, wooden structure built above the line of girls' cabins. In reality, it was not a barn at all but more of a covered porch. Three of the four walls had oversized, window-like openings that brought in the night air. The rain had finally stopped, and the music rang out into the night, echoing and bouncing off the ridgeline just beyond the camp boundary.

As Katniss approached the barn that night, her nerves seemed to be inciting a rebellion in her stomach. She had put on a sundress - the first time she had worn a dress in she didn't know when - and her newer pair of Birkenstocks. She felt awkward and several times stopped, hovering on the idea of going back to her cabin. Her stomach was in a knot at the thought of seeing Peeta, and she was mad at herself about all of it. Why was she nervous? Why did she care so much how other people might look at them?

She had no answers, only knew that she did care, and it made her nauseous to even think about it.

Katniss stood in the filtered light at the bottom of the barn steps. The music was loud and the kids' voices buzzed in a cacophonous hum. She wondered if she could avoid seeing him.

But if she didn't want to see him, what was she doing here in the first place?

"Evenin', sweetheart." Haymitch's voice startled her. As he emerged from the shadows, she saw him take in her appearance.

"You wearin' that for any particular reason?" he chuckled. "In four years, I don't think I've ever seen you in a dress."

She blushed. "Shut up, Haymitch," she mumbled, climbing the steps if for no other reason than to get away from his appraisal and assumptions.

The Barn was mostly dark with lights flashing on the bodies of dancers. She was standing next to a speaker, and some hip-hop tune she didn't know was blasting, causing her eardrums to vibrate. All along the walls, counselors and campers perched on the ledges or stood watching the dancing crowd and shouting at each other to be heard over the music.

Katniss scanned the crowd and soon saw Madge sitting on the window ledge on the far wall with Peeta standing next to her and Thresh and Clove nearby. They hadn't seen her yet, and she looked away, unsure of what to do.

She felt an arm slide around her waist and turned to see Finnick. He smiled at her and began walking. "Come on!" he yelled. When she realized he was heading towards Peeta, she faltered.

He looked at her, and his expression made her think that somehow he understood. He kissed her cheek but tightened his arm around her as he continued walking.

And so she found herself face to face with Peeta. He took her in as she approached – the halter neckline, the shift that skimmed her body, the hemline stopping just above her knees, and her bare legs below – before his eyes swept back up and held hers. She felt her entire body grow warm as he smiled at her.

Finnick's arm left her waist as he moved away from her and Peeta came forward to take his place. She was glad for the darkness because she knew her face and chest were flushed, and she suddenly felt hot and crowded by the number of bodies surrounding her.

The song ended then, and in the brief quiet between songs, he lifted his hand and pushed her hair behind her left ear. "Hi," he said.

She pulled back slightly, looking around to see who was watching them. Kids danced nearby, Madge and Finnick were talking, but no one seemed to be paying attention.

She gave him a half smile as the next song started. She moved to the window ledge and hoisted herself up onto it, kicking off her sandals. Madge immediately wrapped her arm around her and smiled brightly.

Katniss scanned the crowd for Prim. She found her soon enough, dancing with Rue and a boy she didn't recognize. She watched them for a moment before looking back down at Peeta. He had come to stand next to her, but he was staring out at the crowd, too.

He seemed to feel her gaze. He turned and smiled up at her, and as he did, she felt his hand inch up her leg that dangled next to him. She was momentarily glad she had for once taken the time to shave. She discreetly shifted so that her leg pressed into his side, half hidden by his body, and she moved her foot to nestle into his hip.

* * *

The night proved uneventful and she didn't know why she had been so nervous. Peeta didn't press her to dance – of course he didn't – and so they hung out watching the kids and laughing at them as they buzzed around each other, hormones heavy in the air. The girls in Madge's group kept pulling Madge onto the dance floor, and Katniss admired her abandon, her ability to just have fun in whatever situation. Peeta got pulled out a few times, too, and she couldn't help but smirk while watching him. He was a terrible dancer, but that didn't stop him.

Katniss had never in her life been able to let go like that. She was embarrassed even thinking about going out there.

The night was drawing to close when Katniss realized she hadn't seen Peeta in awhile, and looking out over the crowd of dark, bouncing bodies, she didn't see him anywhere.

As she scanned the crowd a second time, he suddenly appeared at her side. She looked down at him with a question on her lips when he reached for her hand and gently tugged her down off the ledge before walking towards the door.

The rain of the day had provided them with a cool night, and fireflies seemed to dance in conjunction with the sound of the cicadas. Katniss followed Peeta around to the back of the barn just beyond the reach of the lights. The music was muted back here, but her ears were still buzzing.

Just as he was stopping and turning to face her, the opening piano chords of "Perfect Circle" began playing inside.

"I love this song," she murmured.

He smiled, pleased. "I thought it was a good choice," he said. Reaching for her hip, he pulled her into his arms, clasping one arm tightly around her waist and twisting their clasped hands to his chest.

As the song slightly picked up its tempo, they swayed together in silence, her face turned upwards to his so that his cheek rested on her temple. His body was warm against her, and when she ran her hand over his arm and up to his shoulder, she could feel the tight muscles flexed under his t-shirt. She shivered slightly, and he pulled her in closer.

"I can't wait until this weekend when I can have you all to myself," he murmured.

"Me, too," she said, imagining them back in her cabin. Alone. Away from the rest of the world.

She felt him pull back, so she opened her eyes to him.

They stared at each other for a moment before moving together, lips meeting gently in a long, soft kiss. As they broke to breathe, Katniss felt a heat spreading through her, and she moved both hands to his face to pull him to her again. A small groan escape him as his arms pulled her up and off her feet. He walked three steps, putting her down by the wall and pinning her to it.

She pulled her hands away from his face so she could snake her arms around his waist, her hands finding the smooth skin under his t-shirt. She ran her hands up his back and over his shoulder blades, pulling him to her and trying to flatten herself against him.

His lips moved to her bare shoulder, and she leaned her head against the wall behind her as his hands skimmed gently up her sides, pausing to squeeze her high up on her ribcage. His thumbs lightly grazed the sides of her breasts as his mouth sucked on her neck.

She heard herself whimper and was distantly embarrassed by her own sounds, but he responded in kind, and she found that his noises thrilled her. She felt his leg pushing against her skirt, and her body reacted instinctively, pushing back, feeling his thigh come between hers. She was beginning to ache, and she pulled on him again, needing to feel his body at every juncture of hers.

She pushed him back slightly, bringing his head up from her chest so that she could find his neck. She reached up, deeply kissing the spot under his jaw before moving down. His skin tasted salty and was slightly rough in spots where his stubble was starting to grow. She ran her tongue back up to his jaw, kissing the bone just there. He was practically humming under her touch and she could feel the vibrations under her mouth.

The song forgotten, the world collapsed around them so that she was only aware of the feel of his skin under her mouth, the sound of her heart beating in her ears, his body hard against hers, the sight of him as her eyes fluttered open and shut.

She was so thoroughly consumed that the sound of a record scratching followed by the shrill opening of "Jump" by Kriss Kross startled her. Katniss jerked away as the music got suddenly louder and she became aware that the dance hall was thumping again

She looked up at him and she could feel her face stretched thin. She felt somewhat dazed and unsure of what had just happened. He was smiling down at her with heavy-lidded eyes. Although she was smiling, Katniss could feel the heat rushing up to her face as she realized how much she had just lost herself.

He wrapped her up in his arms again, hugging her tight and planting a single kiss to her neck. Her ribs pressed hard against his. "I should probably get back," he said regretfully.

"Yes," she said, thrilling again at the feel of her body on his. A fear licked at the edge of her consciousness, and she pulled away, kissed him briefly, and turned to walk back around the corner of the building.

Katniss made her way back towards the light outside the Barn. Just as she saw Clove exiting the hall, she felt Peeta's hand reach for her hip to pull her back to him.

"Katniss?" Clove's voice faltered on the second syllable as she recognized Peeta tugging on Katniss from behind. Understanding filled the girl's face.

Katniss froze, and as Peeta caught up to her, she felt his hand on her back, squeezing lightly.

"Hey Clove," Peeta said lightly. He pushed Katniss forward with his hand, so she passed Clove and walked through the door, Peeta's hand falling away. "Having a good evening?" she heard him say as he passed.

The music prevented her from hearing anything else, but Katniss wasn't sticking around to listen, either. She saw Prim standing by the side of the hall and headed for her.

Prim saw her coming. Her eyes were bright and her face was flushed from dancing. She reached down to hug Katniss, shouting "Hey!"

"I'm gonna go on now!" Katniss shouted back. "Having fun?

"Yes!"

Katniss nodded, hugged Prim again, and turned to go. Peeta was standing behind her. He eyed her closely and she shrugged. She pointed her thumb towards the door and shouted, "I'm heading out."

As she moved past him, he began to go with her, but she stopped him, lightly holding his arm. He looked down at her and she shook her head.

"Bye," she said, giving a small wave, and walked away.

* * *

Katniss lay in bed that night thinking about Peeta, the feel of him under her hands, under her lips. In that moment she had lost herself entirely, and it scared her more than a little bit. The thought of losing all awareness like that was something she never knew was possible. She felt like she had somehow lost control.

The thought nagged her through the night, picked at her consciousness, making her toss and turn. She realized that she hadn't been sleeping well lately. It was as if her blood was coursing through her veins too quickly, making her anxious and hot.

She wasn't sure what would soothe her.

* * *

Katniss knocked on the door of B1 the next morning. "Anyone here?" she called as she began to open the cabin door.

"Hello?" a voice answered.

"Finnick?"

"Hey, Kat. Come on in."

"I wasn't expecting anyone to be here."

"I'm on my way out," he said. He was in his bathing suit with a towel wrapped around his neck. "What do you need?"

"I was coming to check on that leak. I think I got it patched yesterday afternoon, but I wanted to double check it."

"Oh. I think it's OK? I guess we won't really know until the next storm."

"We'll, I'm going to take one last look."

"Feel free." He was staring at her with a smirk on his face.

"What?" she said suspiciously.

"Nothing."

She rolled her eyes and pushed past him into the cabin.

He cleared his throat and then said, "I just never thought I'd see it."

Katniss felt her back stiffen and blood flush her cheeks. She kept her back to him and didn't answer.

"Peeta's a great guy," he prompted.

She busied herself moving a bunk out of the way. "Mmm hmm," she said.

"I just never thought I'd see you with someone, you know? You've always just kept to yourself."

"I'm not _with_ him," she said defensively. She wasn't sure why she said it but she also wasn't sure what he was saying was true. Was she with Peeta? She didn't really want to think about it.

"Oh, OK," Finnick answered sarcastically. "You're trying to keep it secret. That's fine. The hottest camp flings are the ones that are clandestine."

At that Katniss whirled around to face him. "I'm NOT having a fling," she said fiercely. She moved the bunk back into place, dropping it heavily on the wooden cabin floor and stalked past him. "And it's none of your business, anyway," she said, pushing the screen door open so violently that it slammed back against the side of the cabin before closing behind her.

"Katniss," he called to her. "I was only kidding!"

* * *

She felt like she was walking around in a cloud. She felt awkward. She felt unreal. She wasn't herself.

He would not come to see her that night. She knew the kids were watching a movie in the field house and wouldn't get back to their cabins until late.

She had avoided the dining hall again.

Anxiety had enveloped her, and she could not turn off the voices.

* * *

Katniss knew she had to at least make a showing in the meadow Thursday night when they all came up for the campout. She waited until everyone was up and getting ready for dinner before going up. When she walked into the meadow, the sheer number of people milling around enabled her to keep a low profile.

She found Haymitch as soon as she could. "Hey boss," she said.

"Well, hello there, sweetheart. Or perhaps I shouldn't call you that?"

Katniss looked at him with one eyebrow up.

"Well, I don't want to make a certain blonde-haired counselor jealous, do I?" He smirked at her.

Blood rushed to her face, and she felt defensive immediately.

"Do you need me for the hike tomorrow morning?" she asked, blatantly ignoring his comment.

"Well, no. Not really. We should be fine without you," he said.

"Fine," she said, stalking off. She was contemplating returning to her cabin when Madge found her.

"Katniss!" Madge was smiling and putting her arm around her before she could do anything about it. "Our group is over here! Come on!"

Madge led her to a corner of the meadow where sleeping bags had been thrown haphazardly in a pile and kids were milling around, laughing and goofing off.

"Peeta's around here somewhere," Madge said hastily.

"Uh, that's OK. I'm not looking for him," Katniss mumbled.

Madge turned to look at her but said nothing.

"I mean, I'm just here. You know." Again, Katniss felt awkward. She avoided Madge's eyes by pretending to scan the meadow. "Oh," she said. "There's Prim. Is she having a good week?"

Madge wasn't having it. Katniss could tell when she quickly shifted her eyes back to Madge's and saw the look on her face.

"What's going on?" Madge asked.

"Nothing."

"Don't tell me nothing. I know that furrow in your brow. Why are you verklemmt?"

"Verklemmt?"

"Nothing. Saturday Night Live. Never mind. Why are you acting weird? What's going on inside your head?"

"Nothing?" Katniss didn't mean it to, but the single word came out as more of a question. She cleared her throat and then tried to answer Madge again. "Nothing," she said more firmly. "It's just . . . Well, people keep making assumptions about me. About _us_. And, well, it just bothers me." She looked up at Madge, willing her to understand. "I just don't want everyone talking about me and speculating about what's going on."

"So you want to control what other people think?" Katniss nodded, and Madge let out an exasperated sigh. "Really? Katniss, come on. Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"

Katniss felt her face fall. She was feeling embarrassed again, and she raised her hands to dig the heels of her palms into her eyes.

"I can't help it," she mumbled. She felt Madge's arms come around her shoulders, pulling her in for a tight hug.

"You need to get over this," she murmured.

"I'm not sure I can."

Madge sighed in her ear. "Work on it." She squeezed her shoulders once more and released her. "Now go find Peeta. You'll feel better if you talk to him."

* * *

And of course Madge was right. When she found Peeta, he discreetly ran his hand down her arm, stopping to caress the inside of her elbow before continuing lightly down her forearm until he reached her hand, which he gingerly squeezed, using his thumb to massage her palm briefly.

Just his touch changed her. It simultaneously inflamed her senses and calmed the inner voices, even if temporarily.

Later, in front of the camp fire, she sat close to him, their hands clasped together between them. It was discreet and intimate.

"Aww, aren't you two cute?" Clove's voice dripped with sarcasm, and though on one level Katniss understood that the motive might be jealousy, Katniss could only focus on the reality of the situation. Here was a woman she hardly knew making fun of her.

Katniss instantly felt weak, and anger flickered inside her.

Peeta's hand rose up her back and squeezed at her shoulder as he said, "Yeah, we are. So?"

"Must be nice dating someone with her own private cabin, huh Peeta?"

Katniss was dumbfounded. Her heart was beginning to race, and her skin felt prickly. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

"Clove, be nice," Peeta said lightly, but his voice was tinged with anger.

"Oh come on! Tell me you haven't been sneaking up to her cabin all summer! You've hit the jackpot!"

Fury overtook Katniss as she rose quickly to her feet. She glared at Clove and stalked off, but not before she heard Clove laugh and say, "Well, you got yourself a feisty one, Peeta."

She skirted the edge of the campfire, making her way back towards her cabin. She was suddenly out of breath, and she was shaking. She could hear Peeta calling her name, but she didn't stop and in fact quickened her pace. He caught up with her as she was just getting to the path out of the meadow.

"Katniss, stop!" he said, breathing heavily. "Don't do this. It's no big deal! It's just Clove!"

She was shaking her head angrily before he had stopped talking. "It's not just Clove! If she's thinking it, everybody else must be, too!"

"They aren't thinking anything," he said. He ran his hands down her arms and tried to catch her eye. "And anyway, why should we care about her? She's not even our friend! Our friends are happy for us."

But Katniss was mortified, and nothing amplified the voices in her head like humiliation.

"I gotta go," she said, pulling back and turning away from him.

She knew he was standing there watching her walk away. "Katniss," he pleaded. She ignored him and escaped to her cabin.

* * *

It took her awhile to calm down. When she got to her cabin, her breath was coming in short gasps. She closed her front door and leaned back against it, sinking down to the floor. Hugging her knees tightly, she began counting backwards. She focused on her breathing, trying to keep her breaths long and steady.

There was no way to tell how long she stayed there, but she did eventually get up, rousing herself long enough to brush her teeth and crawl into bed.

Another sleepless night. Another night of anxiety. Another night of questioning herself.

When daylight finally seeped into her room, she pulled herself out of bed. She would not be hiking this morning. They didn't need her. It was the entire camp heading out, and there were more than enough adults who knew the boundary trail.

She paced the small cabin as she drank her coffee

She couldn't do this anymore. She was exhausted physically and emotionally. She just wanted to retreat, rewind, start this whole thing over.

And she only knew one way to do that.

* * *

She found him after lunch surrounded by campers on the porch. They were all saying goodbye before heading to separate cabins to pack and head home.

When he saw her approach, his eyes lit up with relief.

She steeled her resolve, hanging back and waiting for the kids to disperse. Prim found her, sliding an arm around her waist.

"Hey, little duck," Katniss said softly. "Good week?"

"The best," she said with a bubble in her voice.

"Well, pack up your stuff and just dump it by my car. We'll head home later this afternoon, OK?"

Without bothering to hear her answer, Katniss, pushed Prim away towards Madge who was heading down the steps towards the cabins. Peeta was approaching, and she didn't want to risk Prim possibly overhearing the conversation they were about to have.

Peeta's face was guarded as he approached, but he reached for her hand anyway.

"Hey," he said.

She took a step backwards so that she couldn't feel his touch, couldn't let his presence soothe the nerves that were running through her body.

He looked at her, and the expression on his face nearly broke her resolve. But she swallowed and looked over his shoulder so that she could avoid the piercing sincerity of his intense blue eyes.

"We can't do this," she blurted out. She knew her forehead was wrinkled, and her eyebrows were so tensely furrowed over her eyes that she felt a headache coming on. But she couldn't relax. Not yet.

"Katniss," he said. His voice was patient, and he reached for her again, this time succeeding in pulling on her arm. But she kept her legs firmly planted where they were and did not move towards him.

He held her palm at arms' length.

"Katniss?" Her name was a question on is lips, and she closed her eyes.

"I just . . . can't," she said. "I'm sorry." She pulled her hand away and stepped another foot backwards.

And then for some reason, she looked at him.

His face was a mask. She had never seen it like that before – completely closed off and distant.

And in an instant, she knew it was done. It was over. She had accomplished what she had set out to do.

She dropped her eyes from his gaze, turned on her heel, and fled the porch.

* * *

**A/N** Grateful thanks to BohemianRider for lots of late-night support. She's the best.


	9. Chapter 9: Peace Comes Dropping Slow

Katniss heard her screen door slam and walked into the den in time to see Prim coming in with her pillow and sleeping bag in her hands and dragging her duffle bag behind her.

"Prim, why'd you drag that stuff all the way up here? You could have just left it by my car."

"Well, uh, Rory's coming to get me," she explained. "I know you've planned on driving me home, but he really wanted to. But I don't know when he's going to get here, so I didn't want to leave my stuff in the parking lot 'cause I think it's gonna rain again."

"Oh." Katniss felt deflated. For once she had been looking forward to going home. She needed to get away from camp.

"Besides, this is your first night all week to really spend with Peeta, right? I figured you'd be glad that Rory offered."

"Yeah," Katniss said weakly. "Right."

Prim looked up sharply, instantly recognizing the tone in her sister's voice. Katniss turned and walked back into the kitchen, but Prim followed her in. "What's happened?"

Katniss couldn't face Prim, so she busied herself putting fresh water into the tea kettle and getting mugs from the cabinet. But Prim wasn't moving and seemed determined to wait her out.

When Katniss had found teabags for each mug and there was nothing left to do, she turned to face her sister.

"I can't," Katniss said stubbornly.

"What does that mean, 'you can't'?"

Katniss sighed in frustration. "I can't be with him, OK? Not here. Not now. It's too hard. Everyone's talking about us: Clove, Finnick, even Haymitch mentioned it! Do you know what it's like to have gained the attention of the most unobservant slug of the entire camp?"

"Don't say that about Haymitch."

The accusation bit Katniss, and immediately she felt contrite and on the verge of breaking down. She turned around again, staring out the window over the sink.

"I know. That was wrong. But Prim, _everyone_ knows. And they're talking like I'm having some fling, like I'm easy."

"Is that the truth?"

"No."

"Then why do you care?"

"I care. I just do."

Prim said nothing for a moment. The kettle started to whistle, so Katniss reached to remove it from the heat and pour the water in their mugs. She felt like she needed to say more, but she didn't know what else to say. She turned to her sister and shrugged.

Prim walked to the counter and added sugar to her mug before stirring it and heading back into the den. Katniss trailed behind her, but Prim waited until they were both seated to speak again.

"How do you feel?"

"I've been stressed all week!" Katniss said desperately. "I haven't been sleeping or eating. I can't concentrate on anything. I'm just this mess of nerves all the time."

"That just sounds like you're in love."

Katniss scowled. "I'm not."

"Maybe." Prim bobbed her teabag in her cup a few times. "But, how do you feel now? Do you feel better? Nothing to be stressed about now, right?"

Katniss reached up to massage her temple. Her head was pounding.

"Are you feeling better?" Prim prompted.

"No."

Prim didn't say anything more.

* * *

Rory showed up pretty early in the afternoon, and they didn't stick around. When they were gone, Katniss found herself alone in her cabin again trying not to mope. She had been alone in this cabin for two years – happily alone. Perfectly content. So why did it feel so empty now? The gaping corners yawped at her, and everywhere she looked, she saw him. In her kitchen teasing her about her lack of spices. On her recliner reading her books. Next to her crate of albums talking earnestly about music.

On the futon. When she thought about him on top of her, her body ached. She felt old and tired.

She retreated to her bedroom, the only place in her cabin Peeta had not been. And that thought depressed her, too.

* * *

Katniss spent Saturday morning in bed. She wasn't sleeping, but she didn't want to see anyone. She found that if she just simply lay there looking at the ceiling, she could forget the turmoil that had turned her mind and heart and gut into one giant, gaping wound. She counted the boards in the paneling on the ceiling. Then she counted the knots in the wood. Then she started categorizing the knots by size and color.

She was so thoroughly engrossed that she did not hear the knocking at her door. But then she heard Finnick bellowing for her.

She slowly got up. It was past noon already, and her body was stiff from lying still.

Finnick was barely inside her door before he began entreating her to go out with them that night.

"Please, Katniss, come out tonight." He was literally begging. "I want you to meet Annie, and well, I want her to see that there are some women in my life who actually like me."

"Then you don't want her to meet me," she said darkly, walking back towards her kitchen. "I'm not sure I do like you."

He stopped her and turned her around, putting his hands on her shoulders. "Don't be like that. We're friends. We always have been, and nothing's changed that, right?"

She sighed. She felt her body sag a bit so that his hands gripped her more tightly.

"What are you doing to Peeta?" he said softly. "I thought you liked him. Don't you?"

She felt a lump in her throat as she tried to swallow, and she scrubbed angrily at her eye with her fist as she straightened up. "I'm not going to go out tonight at all if you bring it up. There's nothing to talk about."

He acquiesced, but ultimately she made no promises about going out.

Katniss got dressed and gave Finnick enough time to get back down the path to camp before setting out to find Madge. She jogged quickly over the bridge, keeping her eyes trained on the road and away from Peeta's cabin. Her heart beat rapidly, and she knew it was not from running.

Safely away from the row of boys' cabins, Katniss skirted the dining hall porch and made the ascent to the girls' cabins. She knocked briskly at Madge's screen door.

"Madge?"

"Katniss! Hey! Come in! I was about to come looking for you."

Madge enveloped her in a long hug, and Katniss squirmed, trying not to get drawn in.

Madge released her but eyed her closely. "How are you?"

"Fine."

"You don't look fine."

"I haven't slept in a week. Of course I don't look fine." She sighed. "Are you going tonight? Please say yes. I don't want to, but if you aren't going to be there, I'm definitely not."

"Yeah, I'm going. And Gale's coming up."

"Yeah?" Katniss asked. Madge nodded, her ears turning pink. "Oh Madge, that's great." She felt sincerely happy that her two friends seemed to be finding each other.

Madge pulled her over to her cot and sat down. "Tell me how you are. Really."

"I don't know what to say," Katniss said. "You can't be surprised."

"Of course I'm surprised! Katniss, you're making a mistake."

The lump in her throat was back, and her voice broke as she said, "It's too hard, Madge. This is never something I wanted." She shook her head as if to shake the idea out of her consciousness.

Madge put her arm around her friend, and Katniss rested her head on her shoulder. She let out a long, quivering sigh.

"You know he's going to be there tonight. Are you up for it?"

"No."

"But you're going anyway?"

"Maybe. Probably."

"Good. You need to."

"Do you think he's gonna want to talk?"

"Honestly, I doubt it." Katniss felt her face fall. "He's . . . Well, he's not in a good place." She paused as Katniss processed the information. "I'd offer you a ride, but Gale is picking me up on his bike."

Katniss sat up. "I'm happy for you. And that's fine. If I drive, I can leave as soon as it gets too much, and I won't drink too much. It's better this way."

* * *

Merv's seemed smokier than usual when Katniss walked in the door. She spotted Finnick immediately in the back sitting at the end of a row of tables that had been pushed together. Everyone was already there, and there was only one spot left at the table – next to Madge but across from Peeta.

She lifted her hand half-heartedly as she approached the table. "Hey, y'all," she said.

Finnick stood up and introduced her to Annie, a slight girl with curly brown hair and green eyes. Katniss made her way down the table so Finnick could introduce them. She forced a bigger smile onto her face and said, "Nice to meet you. I hear you're giving Finnick a run for his money. Good job."

Annie looked surprised, but Finnick's face fell. _Payback,_ Katniss thought to herself. She couldn't resist smirking at Finnick.

She moved back to the empty chair, momentarily squeezing Gale's shoulders as she passed him.

"Good to see you, Catnip," he said.

She sat down and shot a quick glance at Peeta. He was looking down the table at Annie with a big smile on his face. Katniss turned her attention to what Annie was saying.

"All I'm saying is I think dark chocolate is bitter. I like white chocolate better!"

"But it's not actually chocolate! There's no such thing as white chocolate! It's just cocoa butter with a lot of sugar!" Katniss couldn't help watching Peeta as he argued. His eyes were bright, and he was clearly enjoying himself.

"And anyway," Peeta continued, "it tends to harden when you bake it. Whereas _actual_ chocolate melts and just gets better."

"But dark chocolate is bitter!"

"Finnick, bring her to Atlanta, please, so she can taste my double chocolate scones. We put dark and milk pieces in them, and I promise you, it is not bitter."

Annie smiled. "It's a deal. I'm definitely interested in baked goods – especially when I don't have to bake them myself."

Peeta picked up his beer and tilted it in her direction before taking a drink. Finnick was smiling and obviously happy that Annie had hit it off with his friends.

Madge jumped in next. "Annie, Finnick says you're at UGA? Is that how y'all met?"

"Well, we met in Athens, but not at UGA. We both were giving swim lessons at the Clark County YMCA last spring, but we didn't actually meet until his last day working there."

Katniss looked around the table at her friends. She tried to smile and comment to remain a part of the conversation, but she couldn't keep herself from looking at the man across from her. He was ignoring her completely. She didn't see him look her way a single time, and he seemed completely at ease.

She guessed it hadn't meant that much to him after all.

The realization made her sit up straighter in her chair.

She became aware that Annie was asking her a question. "I'm sorry," Katniss had to admit. "I missed what you said?"

"Where do you live when not at Ridgecrest?"

Katniss explained her situation. "I'll be moving to Atlanta in, well, I guess just a couple weeks now."

"Can you believe we've arrived at our last week of camp?" Finnick interrupted. "I tell you, I'm not sure I've got it in me to do this again. This may be my last summer."

"Finnick, you said that last year," Katniss reminded him.

"Yes, and look where coming back got me! I've been in a bad mood all summer."

"I didn't think your mood had much to do with the campers, Finnick," said Madge.

Finnick colored. Katniss felt her mouth drop open. She had never seen Finnick blush. "Yeah, well," he began. "You know," he added. They all waited for more, but nothing else was forthcoming. Katniss saw his hand shift under the table where she was pretty sure he had just put his hand on Annie's thigh. She saw Annie smile slightly.

It wasn't much longer before Katniss was itching to go. She had finished her one and only beer, and she really didn't have much to say. It was hard to avoid looking at Peeta, especially since he seemed to be having no problems avoiding her.

So finally she got up, looking around the table at everyone and saying her goodnights. When she got to Peeta, she glanced quickly at him. He was looking at her for the first time of the evening.

They locked eyes for just a moment, and then he raised his eyebrows and looked away. Dismissive.

"See y'all later," she said and left.

She was getting into her car when Gale caught up with her.

"Catnip." He walked towards her with his hands stuck down low in his pockets. She turned and leaned back against her car, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Madge told me what happened."

"There's nothing to tell, really."

"That's not true."

"Gale what do you want me to say? Everyone knows what happened, and there's nothing else to say."

"I think you're wrong. I have a lot to say."

She glared at him and lifted her chin. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. You're being a stubborn shit. You're only seeing the past."

"That's not what this is about."

"I think it is." He took another step towards her and reached to clasp her arms in his hands. "Madge says Peeta is a nice guy." Katniss did not reply. "He's not Andy. It's not the same thing."

"You're not allowed to bring that up, you know."

"Yes I am. I'm your best friend, and I've known you the longest, so I get to fucking bring it up. You can't go through the rest of your life thinking you're making the same mistake. You're not."

Katniss turned and tried to get into her car, but Gale leaned against the door, preventing her from getting in.

"Get off, Gale."

"Nope. Listen, you made a mistake a long time ago. Boo fucking hoo. How many people have slept with someone and regretted it later? Oh, only most of the human race. It happened once. You're smarter now. It won't happen again. There's no reason to make decisions based on one misstep." He stepped back from the door. "That's all I'm saying."

Katniss jerked the door open and got in. She looked up at him for a minute. She finally shook her head and pulled her door shut. In her rear-view mirror, she saw him standing there as she drove away.

* * *

She got up early the next morning, determined to go hiking. She packed a small bag, left a note on her table in case anyone needed to find her, and went out. She'd been meaning to go on the yellow trail all summer.

The trail was seldom used except by the few through-hikers that came this way, but since it was on camp property, she needed to make sure it was passable at least through the summer season.

The day was hot even early in the morning. That was the gift of July - the mountains stayed cool through most of June, but in July the humidity permeated the air, and as the sun rose above her head, Katniss felt beads of sweat gather above her lip and around her hairline.

It felt good to get out. She moved quickly over the trail, exerting her muscles for the first time all week, and it wasn't long before she was feeling better. With all the rain they'd had last week, she'd neglected spending any real time outside, and she knew from experience that practice was never a good one for her. A thought picked at the edge of her consciousness – that perhaps she could have controlled her anxiety better if she'd just listened to her body. But she swatted the thought away as she focused on the trail, the bird calls overhead, and the sun filtering in through the canopy above her.

As she walked, she stopped here and there to move logs and other debris from the path. Several yellow blazes needed re-marking. She picked a few wildflowers and stuck them in her field guide so she could press them later for Prim.

She breathed deeply, allowing the air to fill her lungs and clear her mind. And as her mind settled, the line arose from the depths of her subconscious. _"And I shall have some peace there, for peace comes dropping slow."_ It was from a poem she had first read in high school, but it had become her mantra in these moments of solitude, allowing her to let go of her conscious thoughts.

Her body moved by rote as all other thoughts fell away and she simply focused on the cadence of the line, feeling her body adjust to the rhythm of the words in her mind.

After awhile, she came to a steep ascent. After fifteen minutes of climbing, she scrambled up the last few yards, finally breaching the top of the rise. Going a few steps further, she reached the lookout that would be her stopping point for the day. She stood still as her breathing slowed and she scanned the horizon. From here she could see the camp nestled into the side of the ridge she had just traversed.

Reaching in her bag, she pulled out her water and took a long drink. She was hungry for what felt like the first time in days.

* * *

When Katniss returned to her cabin, she found a message scribbled on the note she had left on her table: _K – Come find me. H._

She showered and put on clean clothes before heading back out to find Haymitch. Registration for the final week of camp was about to begin, and people were already milling around.

She found Haymitch in his office gathering the registration materials.

"Hey, Haymitch," she said, "I got your note."

"Hey. How was the trail?"

"Good. I was worried that last week's storm might have washed out the pass at Cane Creek, but it was fine."

"Good, good." He tapped his papers on the desk to straighten them before putting them down to rifle through some mail on the desk. "This came for you in the afternoon mail yesterday. Sorry I'm just now getting it to you."

Katniss took the legal-sized envelope he was holding out to her. Her name was handwritten in an old-fashioned scrawl, and on the back the return address showed the Camp Ridgecrest logo.

"It's from Snow," Haymitch said.

Katniss nodded. She stared down at the envelope.

"Go on, sweetheart. Open it up."

Taking a deep breath, Katniss ran her finger under the flap, ripping the envelope open. She unfolded the paper, skimmed the formal heading and began to read:

_Dear Miss Everdeen,_ (Katniss cringed at the use of the title Miss)

_I am pleased to notify you that the Camp Ridgecrest Board of Trustees will be extending your scholarship to cover your final two years of education. Please find enclosed a check to cover tuition and fees for one semester at the Georgia Institute of Technology, and if you continue to maintain at least a 3.5 grade point average, we will continue to support you through your matriculation._

_We recognize that you will no longer be able to inhabit the cabin near the meadow and work as regular maintenance staff throughout the year. Instead, in exchange for your tuition, you will need to visit camp at least two weekends a month where Haymitch Abernathy will keep an agenda for you. You will also be required to meet with members of the Board of Trustees quarterly so that we can be kept updated on your progress._

_We are happy to continue our association with you and look forward to the knowledge and expertise that you will surely bring to Ridgecrest in the future._

_Sincerely,_

_Corin Snow  
Chairman of the Board  
Camp Ridgecrest_

As she read Snow's name, she let out a long, slow breath and looked up at Haymitch. She couldn't hide the smile growing on her face.

"Congratulations," he said.

"Haymitch, thank you. I know this is your doing."

"I didn't do anything..." he began, but she interrupted him by impulsively reaching up and hugging him.

He clasped her back briefly before letting go, and she found herself embarrassed by her uncharacteristic display.

"You deserve it, sweetheart, and I can't say I'm sad that I'll still see your ugly mug around here occasionally."

"Twice a month, I guess," she said.

"And this should help out things with boy wonder, right?"

Katniss felt her face freeze. She didn't say anything.

"You know, despite the fact that you think I don't notice things, I am the eyes and ears of this camp. Don't think I don't know what's going on, girl."

"Haymitch..." Katniss began, but he interrupted her.

"Now listen. You know I don't go butting into your business, but let me say just one thing, and you can ignore it or tell me to shut up once I'm done.

"You've been hiding here too long. It's good for you to get out. It's too safe for you here. You need to live and figure out what you want from life. You can't do that here."

She frowned slightly and looked away, but he put his hands on her shoulders to draw her attention back. "You need to take some chances. And I have a feeling that boy out there is a good risk for you to take."

He stepped back, gathered up his papers, and headed for the door. "And that's all I'm gonna say."

She stood there in his office looking down at the letter in her hands. Haymitch called to her from the front door. "And close the door on your way out, sweetheart."

Walking back to her cabin, Katniss focused on the good news: she was going to Georgia Tech. She could register for classes. It all seemed suddenly real to her. She felt her shoulders relaxing and her spine straightening as stress she hadn't realized she was carrying seeped from her body.

She watched families milling around as she made her way through camp. The porch of the dining hall was already crowded, and she could see Haymitch slumped in his chair, giving the impression of barely being alert.

She didn't know what the coming year would bring, didn't actually know if she'd be back full time next summer or not. She knew that in order to graduate on time at Georgia Tech, students usually had to go at least one summer.

This could be her last week of full-time employment at Camp Ridgecrest. It was hard to imagine.

* * *

With those thoughts in mind, Katniss faced her final week with renewed resolve. Checking cabins and other sites for maintenance needs felt suddenly more urgent, knowing she wouldn't be there much longer to oversee things day-by-day.

Her to-do list suddenly got longer than it ever had been for a single week.

And so she had many hours to herself, hours that she found her mind returning to Peeta again and again. At first she tried to resist, but by midweek, she had stopped fighting it.

Katniss had also gotten tired of eating cereal and pasta alone in her cabin, and when she thought more about it, it got her dander up. No need to avoid the dining hall any longer.

So at lunch that Wednesday, she stalked into the dining hall with a slight scowl on her face and her eyes focused only on the few steps in front of her. She got her tray and sat with the other grubs, only marginally listening to their conversation.

Eating quickly, Katniss dropped off her tray and then found Madge eating a table near the entrance to the dining hall. She was working that week with Thresh, and he smiled and waved at her as she approached.

Madge turned to see who it was and then scooted over to make room for her on the bench. "Sit," she said firmly. "I haven't seen you all week."

Katniss sat. "Yeah, I've missed you," she said quietly.

Madge looked at her and gave a small nod of approval.

After the campers had cleared out and Thresh had gone to play his guitar on the porch, Madge turned to Katniss. "OK now, give me the update."

"There's a lot to tell," Katniss said, taking a deep breath. She told Madge about the letter from Chairman Snow and what that meant for her. She had been able to register over the phone the night before, so things were more settled now than they had been all summer.

"Good," Madge murmured. "Good. One less thing to worry about."

"Yes," Katniss agreed. She sat quietly a moment, trying to get the next words out. "And, ah, I've been thinking. About Peeta." Madge nodded but waited for her to go on. "I think I've made a mistake." Katniss could barely get the words out. "And I don't know what to do," she said in a hoarse whisper.

"Go talk to him, Katniss."

"I don't know if I can," she worried. "I can barely say any of this to you!"

"If it's important to you, you'll find a way," Madge asserted. "Is it important to you?"

"Yeah."

"Then you need to go. We've got some free time now before the next activity starts." Madge scanned the dining hall. "And he's not in here. Maybe you'll find him in his cabin?"

* * *

She knocked lightly on the cabin door. "Peeta?"

She didn't think he was there, but something made her push on the screen door and step inside.

The cabin was empty as she looked around. His bed was closest to the door, and she looked at it, realizing that it was the first time all summer she'd seen where he slept. Blue striped sheets poked out from under a worn navy quilt. On the wall next to his bed, he had carefully tacked the picture of his grandparents that Sae had given to him. That day felt like years ago.

And hanging adjacent to his pillow was a charcoal drawing, a landscape. Katniss took a closer look, leaning over his cot. Sketched in delicate strokes, Peeta had drawn the spot where they had picnicked in Atlanta. She looked at the familiar tree line that almost encircled the spot with the lake visible in the distance. The blanket and picnic basket were there, and just in the corner was her silhouette as she stood staring out at the lake. The lines of the drawing were deliberately smudged in some places but sharper in others, rendering the perspective perfectly.

She knew he had drawn it, but she was also struggling to remember if he'd ever told her of his artwork before. She sifted through memories before landing on the right one: the junior high campout. That was it. When he listed his talents, he'd said he could paint a picture.

The sound of the screen door opening made her whirl around. He was standing in the doorway looking at her.

"Hi," she said, moving away from his bed.

His face was passive but tightly controlled. "Hi," he said, coming into the cabin. He paused a moment before saying, "What are you doing here?"

Katniss swallowed. What was she doing here? She turned back towards his bed and motioned to the picture on the wall. "I didn't know you could draw."

"There's a lot about me you don't know."

She looked at him bleakly. "Yeah."

He waited another minute before asking again, "What do you want?"

"I miss you." She tried to push the words out before she could second guess herself, but she could feel her face flush immediately. Her breathing felt shallow.

He turned away from her and rubbed his face with his hands. "Katniss," he said, her name drawn out in his voice. He sighed. "I don't know if I can do this with you again."

She nodded. She had expected as much.

He turned and looked at her. "I don't know if I really understand you. I mean, I was trying, but you made it pretty difficult."

"It's one of my best qualities."

"Oh, now you can make a joke when last week, you could barely make a coherent sentence."

She crossed her arms and waited.

"I don't know." He walked towards the closet, "And I can't really talk now anyway. I'm just changing shoes before we go creek hiking."

"OK," she whispered, heading for the door.

She was almost through the screen when she heard him call her name. She looked back. His back was to her, and he was leaning one arm against the wall.

"I'll think about it, OK?"

She closed the door quietly behind her.

* * *

Katniss didn't hear from him for several days, and she was glad to be busy. She threw herself into her work and resumed pushing thoughts of him out of her mind whenever they surfaced unbidden.

She also started to think about packing. Though there would be several days of work to do after the last campers left, she began mentally cataloguing what she would bring to Jo's and what would return to her mother's house in Ellijay.

On Friday afternoon as the campers were saying their last goodbyes, Katniss left campus to pick up boxes at the local liquor store. She was carrying them back up to her cabin when she heard Peeta calling her. She turned, trying to keep the boxes balanced.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey." She looked at him closely, trying to divine what he was going to say to her. His eyes were guarded.

"Looks like you're starting to pack," he said.

"Yeah. Big plans for Friday night."

"So I was wondering if I could come by tonight? To talk?"

She could feel her face getting warm. "Yes, of course," she said. She shifted, adjusting the boxes.

He began backing up. "OK. I'll see you." He turned and walked back towards his cabin.

She watched him for a minute before turning back up the path.

* * *

She was sitting on the floor packing books when he knocked on her door. She had almost succeeded in clearing the books off the shelves and was sorting them into boxes.

She looked up at him through the screen. "Hi," she said. "Come on in."

He looked down at her on the floor surrounded by stacks of books, and the smallest hint of a smile played on his lips. It was the most she'd gotten from him in over a week, and it made her stomach flip over a bit before she tamped the emotion back down.

"Looks like you're making some headway," he said.

She blew a few strands of hair out of her eyes as she looked at the piles. "It feels like they're multiplying."

She stood up slowly, stretching her cramped legs. "Have a seat. Can I get you anything to drink?"

"No," he said, sitting down stiffly on one of her kitchen chairs.

She retrieved her water glass from the side table, took a drink, and then sat down on the futon, tucking her bare feet up under her. Her heart was beating fast, and she could feel it in her throat. She looked at him awkwardly, unsure of what was next.

He cleared his throat. "I, ah . . . I wanted to talk to you because I don't like things being uncomfortable between us. I hate the feeling that there's any ill will."

Katniss did not like the sound of that. It sounded too much like the opening of a 'let's just be friends' speech.

He cast a glance at her and then got up, pacing in the small room, flexing his fingers a few times before finally burying them in the pockets of his shorts.

"Katniss, I've liked you for a long time – longer than you know." He stopped and looked at her squarely. "Since we were kids."

Katniss tried hard to steel her face and keep her emotions in check. She tried to focus on his words alone instead of how his words made her feel.

"But I just don't know if you'll ever get there." He began pacing again. "I'm afraid I'll always be waiting for you to catch up."

"We barely knew each other as kids."

He stopped. "Correction – you barely knew me. Katniss, I first noticed you the second day of kindergarten.""

She processed this new information.

"But despite that, it's not worth it me to try to make something out of nothing. I don't think I'll ever mean as much to you as you do to me. And if I'm always second guessing you, this will never work."

He stopped pacing and looked at her again. "How do I know that you're not going to freak out on me again? How do I know that this means enough to you to stick it out when you get scared?"

"I'm fucking scared right now, but I'm trying to wait it out!"

"That's the thing, Katniss!" His hands were gesticulating widely. "You have to talk to me. Tell me when you're freaking out." He waited a beat. "Katniss, tell me why you're scared."

She frowned, stricken. Could she do this? Her pause was long and uncomfortable. When she finally spoke, her voice trembled. "I'm not sure I can look at you if I'm going to say this."

He peered at her for a moment before sitting down next to her. Slowly he reached out and put his arm around her, pulling her head to his shoulder so that her face was hidden beneath his chin. She took a deep breath, and her senses were flooded with him. She closed her eyes.

"What are you afraid of?"

Katniss swallowed. Even without looking at him, this was hard to say, but his hands had begun running circles on her back. She allowed his touch to comfort her, drawing strength and resolve from him.

_I need to do this_, she thought. She took another deep breath.

"I'm scared I've screwed everything up so much that I won't be able to fix it," she said. Her voice was barely more than a whisper, and she felt him lean down over her to listen. "You make me feel like my worries don't matter, like everything will be OK, and it scares me to lose focus even for a moment." She paused as she tried to force the next words out. "But even more I'm scared that I'll never feel that way again."

His hands had stilled on her back. Her heart was pounding and her palms were sweating and her breaths were shallow, but she _had_ to know what he was thinking. So she braced herself and lifted her head from his shoulder so she could look at him.

His eyes were dark as he contemplated her words. She wanted to reach up and touch his face, feel his skin warm and solid beneath her shaking hand, but she could tell he still had defenses up. He stood up and raked his hands through his hair.

She sighed and sat back. She had one more thing to tell him, to show him, and she hoped it would be enough. She had never thought to show him, had thought to hold on to this one last secret, but now she was willing to give it all, spend it all, try everything to convince him to give her one more chance.

"I know you think you didn't mean much to me back then. And I didn't know you. Not really. But you changed me – whether you realized it or not."

He looked at her, skeptical.

"No, it's true." She pointed. "Do you see that picture of my dad up there?"

He looked at the near-empty shelf.

"There's a box next to it."

He reached up to retrieve it. "This?"

She nodded. "Look inside."

It was a hinged, wooden box, a little smaller than a shoe box with wood-burned designs intricately carved on the edges. "Beautiful box," he mumbled. He lifted the lid and then glanced up at her quickly when he saw what was inside. She knew he recognized it.

"Wow," he said and sat down on the futon so the box could rest in his lap as he pulled from it the white dress with yellow smocked roses. He inspected it closely before saying quietly, "I'm so glad you still have this."

"I was so angry that day," she said. "But later, I began to be glad things happened the way they did, that I didn't have to trade the dress away. I know I would have regretted losing it." She looked at him closely. "I've always wanted to thank you."

He was shaking his head. "You don't have to thank me. I was so mad at my mother. She knew you had been cheated, but she didn't do anything about it."

"You don't understand, Peeta, it's more than that. That was the first time I understood that things can work out for the best. Even when it feels like you're surrounded by despair and misery, sometimes things do work out.

"It gave me hope. _You_ gave me hope. I've never forgotten that. And I never forgot you."

He inspected the dress a minute more before folding it again and putting it back into the box. He closed the lid and looked up at her and said, "I remember how you changed."

"What do you mean?"

"It was like you stopped being a kid. I knew your father died over the summer, and when we got back to school, you had changed." He reached up and ran his hand over her forehead. "You had developed this." He used his thumb to smooth out the lines between her eyes.

She froze under his hand. "I remember wishing there was something I could do to help," he said with a shrug and dropping his hand.

"You did help us," she whispered.

He nodded slowly.

Katniss stood and walked back over to the shelf. She pulled down the picture of her father and studied it a moment before wrapping it in a sheet of newspaper and tucking it carefully into one of the boxes.

When she turned back around, Peeta was standing up. It looked like he was ready to leave, and Katniss felt the dull ache in her gut double in size. Her chest and throat were tightening up, and she knew she wouldn't be able to hold herself together much longer. Time to end this.

"Well," she said, swallowing hard and looking away from him. "I guess I just want to say I'm sorry."

He was right in front of her now, and she cast her eyes to his. He was looking at her so steadily that she felt like she could barely meet his eyes. But she could not look away, either.

He raised his hand to her face. She froze, not allowing her brain to process this action, not allowing her heart to interpret what this might mean. His thumb brushed over her cheek as she looked up at him. His eyes were burning into hers as he slowly lowered his lips.

The intensity was immediate. His arms encircled her tightly, crushing her body to his. She gasped and arched against him, and he moaned. The sound set her on fire. She opened her mouth, reaching for his upper lip, sucking on it.

"I missed you," she said, suddenly urgent to tell him again. Her anxiety fell away as she pulled back to kiss his eyes, his cheeks, his lips again. "I missed you, I missed you, I missed you," repeating it with each kiss.

He sagged into her, leaning on her as he buried his head in her neck. She felt him breathe in deeply as she strained to hold him up but reveled in his weight. For the first time she realized what the last week had done to him, and she felt guilt bloom inside her. He straightened, pulling his hands up her sides until they rested on her face as he looked into her eyes.

She could barely stand it. Like looking into the sun, she wanted to close her eyes under his piercing gaze. She felt like she was unraveling. He buried his hands in her hair as he returned her kisses, her eyes, her cheeks, and finally again her lips.

Holding onto his waist, Katniss began backing up, pulling him with her towards the kitchen. She bumped through the doorway, through the kitchen. He was smiling into the kiss as she pulled him through the back hallway and into her bedroom, stopping when she felt the backs of her knees hit the bed.

She pulled back from him, smiling as she scrambled onto her small bed. She reached out for him, and he kicked off his Converse and crawled up beside her. When he was next to her, she rolled onto her back, pulling him on top of her. His arms braced himself on either side of her head, but she wrapped her arms around his back and pulled him to her fully.

She sighed deeply. This. This was what she needed. She relished the feel of his weight on her, holding her down. He settled between her legs, and she wrapped her calves around his.

"Katniss," he was murmuring her name as his lips found her neck. "Katniss," he said again.

He pressed into her, and she shifted slightly under him until she could feel him just _there_. She gasped. Even through her clothes she could feel him hard and pushing into her. She pushed back, grinding until she heard him groan into her neck. The sound electrified her senses.

He pulled back, slowing things down. Wrapping his arms around her, he rolled, pulling them both onto their sides, facing each other, touching, but lessening the fervor of the moment. She let out a long, shuddering breath.

His hand found her hip and pushed her shirt up so he could caress the skin at her waist.

After their breathing slowed**, s**he said, "I'm sorry."

He pulled her closer so her head rested on his arm, tucked under his chin. "I just wish we'd had more time together last week," he said. "I've had this thought that if I could have seen you every day, I don't know, maybe I could have kept you from . . ."

"Freaking out."

"Yeah."

She reached up to kiss him again. "I'm sorry."

"It's over now," he said, kissing her back before allowing her to settle again. "Tell me your news."

"About Tech? Did you hear?"

"I want to hear it from you."

And so they talked – touching each other as they shared this moment: his hand on her hip, pushing her shirt up little by little, exposing more skin, her hand curling and uncurling in his hair.

They were quiet for a little while, holding each other, relishing time. She felt herself growing sleepy when his voice roused her.

"Are you a virgin?"

She squirmed, glad to hide beneath him. "No," she said hesitantly. "I had sex once. In high school. It was a bad decision."

"Did you love him?"

"I thought I did at the time, but in retrospect, no."

"What happened?"

"He dumped me. Within a few days."

"Wow," he said, gathering her closer."What an idiot. He had no idea what he had."

She kissed his neck before pulling back so she could see him, her face on the edge of her pillow. "How many partners have you had?" She wasn't sure she really wanted to know the answer.

"Three."

"Did you love them?"

"Same. I thought so. I wasn't using them." He raised his hand to her cheek. "But I've never felt for anyone what I feel for you, so I guess the answer is no. I didn't love them."

She could tell they were tip-toeing around a bigger conversation, but she was glad to keep it at bay for now. She reached up and kissed him – a soft, slow kiss that acknowledged what had gone unsaid. Pulling back, she looked up at him, raising her hand to caress his face and draw his hair back from his eye.

The stress of the week was beginning to weigh on her. She stretched, taking a deep breath that turned into a yawn. He smiled at her.

"You look tired."

"I haven't been sleeping well," she murmured, nestling back into him. "Will you stay with me?"

"Always."

* * *

**A/N **Ack! I know that end has become a cliché but I couldn't help it.

The title of the chapter and the line Katniss repeats while she's hiking is from Yeats' poem, "The Lake Isle of Innisfree."

This story is reaching its end. There is just one more chapter – an epilogue. I wanted to say thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, and followed this story. The entire process of writing it has been such a wonderful surprise for me. Writing fiction is something I thought I would never do, so the feedback I've gotten from you has been so gratifying. I can't say thank you enough.

And the biggest thank you goes to BohemianRider, who has been such a wonderful support to me over the past few months – above and beyond the confines of this story. I am so grateful to call her a friend.


	10. Chapter 10: Epilogue

**Ellijay, Georgia 1984**

When Peeta had made the long ride from his house back to the thrift store and then on to Katniss' house, the sun had been out, and he had worked up a sweat climbing the last hill to her street. His heart had thumped in his chest as he had walked up her driveway. His sweaty palms crumpled the brown paper bag he was holding as he knocked on her door.

But she hadn't been home, and that was almost an hour ago, and since then as he had waited on the step by her kitchen door, the sun had fallen behind the trees, and the day was growing colder. He looked at his watch every few minutes, unsure of what to do.

He could just leave the bag by the door. She would find it and maybe – maybe – she'd know who had brought it. But that felt too uncertain, and ultimately, he really wanted to see her again. One last time.

Peeta would never forget the second day of kindergarten. He was new to Ellijay and still trying to learn the names of the other kids in his class. The teacher had made them line up at the door of the classroom so they could go to music, and Peeta was nervous. His brothers made fun of his singing voice all the time, so he never sang in public. As they had paraded down the hall, Peeta frowned down at his brother's tennis shoes that had just been handed down to him. They were too big, and he had tripped twice already that day because of it.

The music teacher made them all sit in a circle while she taught them a song to learn each others' names. She would sing a line first, "Where is Juny?" and then the class would sing with her, "Where is Juny?" At that point, Juny would sing out his response, "Here I am, here I am!" Then everyone would sing, "We have come to greet you, very nice to meet you. La la la. La la la." Each child would be called on as they sang the simple tune and learned names.

As luck would have it, Peeta's name was one of the first called out. His heart began to race as he heard his own name on his teacher's lips, echoed in the next line by all the other children. It was his turn to respond. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. The teacher was looking around the circle and the other children were looking at each other. Who was Peeta? Who was supposed to answer?

Suddenly, he heard a voice next to him rise up above the murmurs in the room.

"Here he is, here he is!"

Peeta turned to the girl next to him. She was smiling at him, and as he stared into her soft, gray eyes, he suddenly felt reassured.

The girl continued the song then with the teacher and other children, and the moment passed, but Peeta felt like his world had suddenly changed. After that, he couldn't really focus on anything but figuring out her name. The rest of the song went by as he listened carefully. Finally the teacher called a name, and Peeta realized the girl wasn't singing along. And then she was singing alone again.

"Here I am, here I am!" Her voice was clear and ringing, resounding inside of him and filling him in a way that made his chest expand. He knew her name.

Katniss.

It was as if everyone else around them suddenly fell away, and she was the only one in the room. The song came to an end and she turned to him, somehow alerted to the fact that he was staring at her.

She looked puzzled as her eyebrows came down over her eyes, and he realized his mouth was open. His face flushed red – he could feel the heat of it – and he instantly turned towards the teacher. He was so embarrassed. He didn't look at her again for the rest of the class.

He had never even spoken to her, never thanked her.

His hesitancy towards her had become ridiculous over the years. In a small corner of his brain, he knew they were basically friends in that vague way all kids are who attend the same school in a small town. If he just said hello one day, it wouldn't be a big deal. But the larger part of his brain was too consumed by the myriad of times he had stared at her, imagined her life, seen her unexpectedly in town, all the occasions he had tried and failed to approach her, and as a result, he couldn't bring himself to make a step.

Until today. Perhaps it was the inevitability of leaving that had finally pushed him to talk to her in the thrift store. Perhaps it was the sheer luck of just happening to see her on this day, his last one in Ellijay. His mind veered away from the idea of fate. Too many bad things had happened to him in his short life to think that there was any willful hand directing his life. He was too optimistic to believe that.

But when he saw her in the Goodwill store earlier, he knew he had happened upon an unexpected piece of luck, and he had to act on it. So he had approached her, spoken to her, and then when he'd seen what happened with the dress and the book, he knew he could do something. For the first time in his life, he made up his mind to act regardless of consequences. He could help her and he would because he couldn't leave this town and know that he'd let slip by this one chance to help Katniss Everdeen.

So he sat shivering in her carport waiting for her to come home, knowing that he'd have to leave soon in order to get home while it was still light outside.

Finally he saw her cautiously pushing her bike up the driveway. She didn't understand why he was here, and even after he handed her the bag, she looked wary.

And then she was pushing the bag back at him. "I can't!" she said anxiously.

He stepped back, shocked, holding his hands up so she couldn't shove the bag into them.

"I can't take this! I can't pay you for it!" Her voice was frantic now, and he realized how fragile she was. A fear flashed through him as he realized he had not thought this through. He hadn't expected that she might not accept his gift.

"Katniss, please! I don't want you to pay me!" He tried to explain. He just wanted to help. But standing there, it was as if he was watching her unravel, and before he knew it, he was hugging her. What had gotten into him? Where did this decisive person come from? Maybe he just couldn't stand to watch her cry.

He felt awkward patting her back as she stood there stiffly, and before he knew it, he'd begun talking, rambling on about who knows what. But the entire time he talked, an alarm was ringing in the back of his mind. He had to get home. He was going to be late.

"Think of it as a going away present," he said, taking a step back from her.

Her eyes looked confused again. "But you're the one going away." He could tell that in her mind his explanation didn't add up.

"Yeah." He was getting nervous. It was late. His mother would be looking for him. "I'd better get going," he said, backing away from her and then turning down the driveway.

She followed him down and stood by as he picked up his bike and got on. He looked back at her one more time. He just couldn't believe he would never see her again.

"I don't know what to say." She was practically whispering, and her face still showed the anguish churning inside her. "Thank you."

He couldn't help himself. He reached up with one hand and cupped her face.

"I'll see you again," he said, feeling more assured than he ever had in his life. He couldn't have explained it. In that moment, he just _knew_.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, he pulled up in front of the bakery where his father stood loading a U-Haul truck. His father looked up as he got off his bike.

"There you are," he said, frowning slightly. "We were beginning to worry." He reached for the bike and lifted it up, sliding it between a dresser and the wall of the truck.

"I, uh, just had to take care of one last thing."

His father looked at him curiously. "Everything OK?"

"Yeah. "

"Well, your mother's inside. She's been looking for you."

Peeta grimaced as he read between the lines of his father's warning. He walked up the steps to the bakery slowly, holding the bell on the door so it would not signal his arrival. Lightly taking the stairs up from the kitchen, he could hear his mother on the phone.

"I will be so relieved to move back into an actual house. Really, Celia, you don't know what it's been like, living above the bakery like a bunch of immigrants. So humiliating . . ."

Peeta rounded the landing that led to the Mellark's living room and was on the third step up to the next floor and the safety of his bedroom when he heard his mother's voice.

"Peeta!"

Scotta Mellark had a disquieting way of saying his name, never actually yelling, but the tone she used sent a cold spike of fear into his gut each time.

He pivoted on the steps, "Yes, Mother?"

"Come down here."

He slowly descended the few steps to the living room which was now full of boxes, the furniture having already been taken out to the truck. His mother was standing in the doorway to the kitchen.

"Where have you been?" she asked, her voice controlled.

"I just had to, I mean, I wanted to say goodbye to a friend."

"We've been working all afternoon. Without you."

"I helped before I left. Dad said we were mostly finished."

She looked around the room. "Does it look like we are finished?" She took several steps to cross the space between them. "Is your room finished?"

"Almost," he said firmly. "I have to pack my bookshelf and then just the last minute stuff that I'll put in one last box tomorrow morning."

He saw the back of her hand coming, and he braced himself. The hit itself didn't hurt so much anymore, but when her rings raked against his cheek, he flinched as they cut into his skin. Still, he tried to keep his face composed. He was expecting this consequence.

"I'm sorry."

"Get up there and finish. And think twice before you disappear again. You don't go anywhere with my say so, you hear?"

* * *

Later that night, Peeta had packed everything but his sleeping bag and his clothes and toothbrush for the morning. His brothers had each chosen corners of the room for their sleeping bags, but he'd put his near the door. Hidden under his pillow were a sketchpad and his best pencil.

He'd been waiting all evening for a quiet moment, and as soon as his brothers were snoring with varying degrees of vigor, he snuck out of the room and down the stairs to the bakery. In the stairway he could still catch the smell of bread despite the fact that they hadn't baked since yesterday morning. The room was perpetually warm even without the ovens going.

After turning on the light, he walked past the long row of ovens and hoisted himself up on the big, stainless steel counter at the far end of the kitchen. He rested his back against the oven knowing that from here, it was hard for anyone to see him.

Pulling his legs up underneath him, he opened his sketchpad to the next clean page and started with an oval, slightly lopsided. He grounded it by sketching the graceful curves of her neck and shoulders. Next he placed the outline of her eyes and shaded her nose – somewhat angular but not sharp. Before beginning her cheekbones, he closed his eyes. He could still feel the hard plane of her jaw, the softness of her cheek under his palm. He let out a long breath and returned to his work.

He spent the most time on her eyes. The charcoal pencil was the perfect tool for bringing out the storm in them, the troubled look that haunted him. If he could just get it right.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been working. He gradually became aware of his neck straining over the pad. His back seemed frozen in place. He used his pinky to smudge one last line – the shadow that brought out the worry between her eyes – before straightening up. His back ached as he stretched out his legs. He looked critically at the picture. It wasn't quite right, but it was the best he could do for now. He'd have to try again.

Sliding down from the counter, he walked over to the light switch on the wall. He surveyed the kitchen again. He would miss so much of this place. He flicked off the light and quietly crept back upstairs to his room.

* * *

**Blue Ridge, Ga, 1992**

Peeta peered into the back of the Suburban. Between his car and hers, they had managed to pack all of Katniss' stuff and were getting ready for the drive to Atlanta.

The last few days had been busy. The counselors had divided into teams to address clean-up and lock down of each area of camp in preparation for the off-season.

And Peeta and Katniss continued seeing each other. He tried to be sensitive to her fears of public consumption, and he also made sure they had time alone every day.

They had spent that first night together waking and sleeping, wrapped in each other. They'd initially gone to sleep with her spooned up against his chest, but he'd awakened some hours later to find that he must have turned over on his side at some point. She'd followed him and was pressed up tightly behind him, one arm around his waist, her hand resting precariously below his belt. He'd lain there a moment, unsure of what to do until he'd finally rolled over. Slowly he shifted until he was facing her, bringing her hand with him, holding it in his own and bringing it to his lips.

She had opened her eyes then, staring at him vaguely in the dark room. And then her hand had traveled to his hair, pulling gently on it as she sighed. He couldn't help himself. He kissed her forehead and then her closed eyes, and then he had moved to her cheek. She sighed again, stirring, as he rolled her on her back so he could continued softly kissing along her jaw. He felt her hands tighten around him, as his lips tugged gently on her earlobe. And then they were kissing again, urgently in the darkness. Her body felt hot in his hands as she moved against him. He couldn't stifle a groan when she nestled her hips into his, seeking the contact that he also craved.

He could tell when she became aware of him hard against her. She tensed in his arms and pulled back minutely, looking at him. His hand cupped the side of her face, feeling the hard plane of her jaw and the softness of her cheek. He ran his thumb across her cheekbone, a part of her he could draw with his eyes closed.

"Should we . . . ?" Her voice stalled.

"Stop. Yes." His answer was gruff, but he pulled back lying down beside her and pulling her to him. She nestled into him, her back to his chest, and he couldn't keep from pulling her hips tight to his.

It had been an excruciating night.

He had made a conscious decision to sleep in his own cabin since then – mostly because it would have been too easy. He knew they needed to wait, but if he had stayed with her, he would have been hard pressed to hold himself back like he had that first night.

His instincts told him to go slowly. Camp was not real life: hadn't Madge tried to tell him that the first week he was here? And he realized the truth in her words now that he was on the other end of the summer. He'd only been away from home six weeks in all, and yet he felt as if he'd been gone much longer.

And anyway, he couldn't deny that he was still a bit wary of his relationship with Katniss. Hell, he didn't know if he was supposed to call it a relationship. He had tried not to think at all in those terms, tried hard not to label it in his mind but instead just live in the present and not question the future.

But it was hard. He was a planner by nature.

And then there was the issue of what would happen when they got home.

Home. He wasn't even sure what that word meant to him anymore. If this summer had emphasized one thing, it was that he needed to move out of his parents' house. He was too old to stay there, and even in the few days he'd spent there during the break, he had felt himself falling into old habits of appeasement. He was an expert when it came to the duck-and-weave way of dealing with his parents. He'd managed to negotiate their expectations for him before by placating them, avoiding them and keeping his true feelings to himself. But he didn't want to do that anymore, and he knew that if he let himself be real around them, it would only lead to the raging arguments that had replaced the physical abuse of his childhood.

After having the smallest taste of living on his own, Peeta knew he could not go back. Not for long. His first priority was to help Katniss get settled. Then, he'd do the same for himself.

He reached into the back of the Suburban, adjusting piles one last time and making sure things were secure, before closing the back gate and heading into her cabin.

He found her staring out the kitchen window, lost in thought. Coming up from behind, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back against his chest. He reached down and kissed her cheek.

"Hey," he said quietly. "How are you doing?"

She took a deep breath. "It's weird," she said. "It's hard to believe I'm leaving this place."

"You'll be back."

"Yeah, but it won't be the same."

"No." He paused. "Are you sorry to leave?"

She turned in his arms and nestled into his neck. "No, I'm ready. Just . . . nostalgic, I guess."

He ran his arms under her shirt, feeling the smooth skin of her back under his palms. She shifted, and he felt her lips briefly on his neck.

"It's weird to be at a point where I can't envision what my life is going to be like. I mean, just the day-to-day, you know?"

He pulled back and peered into her face. "It's exciting," he said.

"Yeah," she agreed, but there was a note of uncertainty in her voice that was echoed in her eyes. She looked up at him and gave a half smile. Her hands found his cheeks briefly before burying into his curls. She reached up to kiss him gently and then returned her head to his chest.

He held her a few moments until he heard her take a deep breath. She pulled away.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Yeah. Ready." Holding his hand, she walked out of the kitchen, through the living room, and out the door. Once he had exited too, she reached in and pulled shut the heavy wooden door and then closed the screen. She stepped back and followed Peeta down the path to their cars.

He led the way and opened her car door. "I'll follow you since I'm not exactly sure where we're going."

She stepped towards the door but did not get in. Turning to him, she said, "See you at Jo's place" and gave him a quick kiss.

He pulled her back to him for a deeper kiss. "See you at your place."

* * *

**A/N**

If you're interested, head over to my tumblr, .com, for some extended author's notes.


	11. Chapter 11

Hi! I just wanted to let all those who followed this story know that I have begun publishing a sequel called "Three Words That Became Hard to Say." You can find it on my profile page.

I hope you enjoy it!

Penelope


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